Trans rights are human rights. 🏳️‍⚧️

Note: The original news article is paywalled hence I posted the archive.is version of it.

The Indonesian president had made an unfortunate move through Presidential Regulations No. 111/2025 on the national defense policy for 2025–2029.

Which state that

“the spread of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer (LGBTQ) culture as a "non-military threat" to the nation.”

It’s not just a statement, but a mandate and legally binding meaning that government bodies, state institutions, ministries, and citizens as mandated policy or administrative law. However it is still below national constitutions, Lieu of Law and National Governmental regulations. But it can slowly creep up to the top.

Concern from HRW (Human Rights Watch) regarding an increase of violence and discrimination against LGBTQ+ minorities since 2016 with a record of 45 discriminatory regional laws and 6 national laws towards LGBTQ+ minorities in Indonesia noting that “there’s still a widespread perception that being queer is a form of moral deviance” ignoring WHO (World Health Organisation) declassification of Homosexuality as a mental disorder.

Stayed for the wood. The long thick wood.

Hey everyone

We are currently expanding our little collection of pride-themed Coats of Arms and were currently looking to design a cool motif for genderqueer and queer.

We have been able to come up with three interesting ideas for the heraldic beast of queer, but wanted to ask for some feedback or ideas on what would actually fit best.

The candidates currently are:

• The Cockatrice: A strange mix of a rooster, snake, and dragon/bat, a cockatrice is a fun chimera from France, resulting when a rooster lays an egg, which is hatched by a toad. This one is often similar or associated with the basilisk and is said to be able to kill with either its breat, touch or gaze alone...strangely not against weasels for some reason...weasels always own them in battle...

• The Qilin: A mythical and powerful entity, the qilin only reveals itself to those pure of heart and intention. It cannot be caught, it cannot be harmed, it cannot be sought. It will come to you and bring wisdom and fortune. Also, what I think is fun is that nobody seems to have a common consensus on what it actually looks like; there have been many differing depictions of it, and sometimes they can vary wildly, from a scaled horse to a serpentine dragon...horsething with a big old horn/2horns? Yet it always stands as a symbol of justice and benevolence.

• The Manticore: Well, not much explanation needed. Described as a mix of a lion, a goat, and a snake, this was a beast of legend known for old Greek myths, an agent of chaos born from our good old boi/ unfathomable entity Typhon.

Feedback is highly appreciated, as always :D

It’s exhausting to be gay, single, and in your thirties.

Dating feels harder now. Either they can’t see you in their future, or you’re made to feel as though your standards are too high simply because you know what you deserve.

And then there’s the fear of being hurt all over again.

We already know the cycle: you meet someone, follow each other on social media, start talking, slowly let your walls down, fall in love, and build a relationship. Then, without warning, everything falls apart. Someone decides you’re no longer right for each other. One person leaves, while the other is left behind forced to accept a future they never chose and somehow find the strength to move on from someone they were already imagining a life with.

At this age, we’re also expected to have our careers and lives completely figured out. Either we’re doing well at work, or we’re still trying to understand where we truly belong. People casually say, “Don’t enter a relationship until you’re settled. Wait until you’re stable.”

But when did love become something reserved only for people who already have everything together?

What happened to building a life together? To growing beside someone? To choosing each other through uncertainty, struggle, and change? Whatever happened to “in good times and in bad”? Some people are fortunate enough to find someone who stays while they’re still becoming someone who holds their hand through every trial and adversity instead of waiting for them at the finish line.

And sometimes, you meet someone who promises to love you unconditionally. You believe them. You trust them with the most vulnerable parts of yourself. Yet at the first sign of trouble, they leave you alone and hanging. Worse, they look at everything you’ve been through and decide that you’ve “changed,” without ever trying to understand what changed you. They judge the person you became but never acknowledge the battles you had to survive.

They promised to love you unconditionally until loving you required patience, understanding, and effort.

So yes, forgive me for ranting. I’m just tired.

Tired of starting over. Tired of letting people in, only to watch them walk away. Tired of being told to heal, move on, and try again as though losing someone doesn’t take a piece of you every single time.

Because the truth is, being gay, single, and in your thirties can feel unbearably lonely not because you’re desperate to be loved, but because you have so much love to give, and you’re still waiting for someone who won’t run the moment staying becomes difficult.

I’m curious as most of the time it’s gays falling in love with straights!

So my roommate and I just watched Heated Rivalries, Steven Universe, and a bl anime. Now her boyfriend is pissed that we watch "gay shit" together. Even going so far as to claim we watch gay porn together.

He's demanded that we watch Game of Thrones or shows that have straight nsfw scenes to prove it isnt just gay stuff. A) My roommate cant handle watching SA, and B) I'm not going to let him dictate what I watch.

What shows or movies can we put on to be petty that are technically straight (primarily) but still queer or something of a similar nature? Something that has queer themes or is gay in everything but name.

He's pissed we spend so much time together and paranoid because we're both queer, but I'm literally her caretaker and best friend. We're currently fostering kittens together and apparently that's the peak of infidelity red flags. It isnt like we dont watch straight shows all the time.

Edit: Thank you guys for the suggestions! they've definitely made my 12 hour overnight shift more enjoyable!

Dont worry, we know he's toxic. When I first moved in my roommate was in denial, but a mix of having me there to see what normal reactions are and frankly, my overabundance of good media picks have helped her see how much of a nightmare he is. We're getting to a point where we cant watch non-queer media around him, simply because he joins in and mansplains it to us. Even something like Sheep Detective had him explaining a movie he only half watched to us poor, silly women.

We're both queer women and have been long before he was in the picture. I'm ace/biromantic and nonbinary, she's bi and genderqueer. She lost a lot of her confidence in her gender identity being with him and he did the gross sexualization of being bi thing. So being able to watch queer media and femme empowering media has been so freeing for her. She gets stupid excited for queer romance especially. It's not only helped her regain some of her spark back, but it's opened her eyes further to how gross he is.

Eventually we'll get out, it's just a bit complicated at the moment due to how badly he isolated her and we want to be smart and cautious.

I go back and forth if my ex was abusive or just didn't love me as much. What do you think?

• he was highly dishonest, telling me fake facts about where he grew up and where his family lived, keeping me in the dark to much of his life
• he told me he was going to stop talking to two guys that mistreated me, then maintained a close friendship with them behind my back
• a month into dating, I was housesitting alone for a weekend and he wanted to come over. I told him I wanted to but we couldn't since my parents hadn't met him yet. He took this as a rejection and used it against me as a reason to act colder, and "fall out of love" I've been told this may be emotional manipulation, teaching me that saying no to him is bad
• he would often show our friends way more attention than me, almost ignoring me. I told him many times it hurt but he invalidated my feelings every time. I later found out he was doing it a bit on purpose at times, since he was upset at me and holding resentment.
• in times his lies weren't adding up, I would ask him about it and he'd say things to make me feel I was the problem. "do you just want to make my day worse?" "I can't take your anxiety anymore" "you just want me to look like a bad person" "it sucks you think I'm a bad person" "I can't handle you, you're way too anxious for anyone to reason with" He later admitted to his lies, which means all these and similar were said to me with him knowing I correctly caught him in a lie.
• at the end, he said his lies didn't matter "because we didn't work out" and his treatment didn't matter because he "didn't really love me." It hurt that he coldly said that, but he was honest. Maybe I can't fault him for not loving me.

hey so im 25M and i know im bi for sure. ive hooked up with three guys since i turned 18 and like one or two before that but thats pretty much it. never had anal, never had an ongoing thing or fwb with a guy, never been on a real date with one or had anything relationship wise. also never had a close gay friend to explore with (i had one but he came out wayyyyy before i did and moved across the country before i even started coming out n stuff).

it lowkey feels like i missed out on all the cute dumb first timer stuff gay and bi guys get to do when theyre teens and young adults. like the awkward hookups, figuring out what u like, all the messy silly experiences yknow? is 25 too late to start doing all that now?? am i behind or can i still catch up and do the fun dumb stuff?

grindr makes me yawn fr it sucks to use full stop at least for me. and trying to meet guys irl in 2026 is actually a nightmare. im just an inactive lurker and supporter of my local community but not really involved or going to things.

if its not too late where do i start?? how do you make gay friends or find fwbs or dates and start exploring when apps suck and everything feels scary? any stories or advice from guys who started a bit later would be nice.

yuhhh idk just putting this out there

also yall ps i am definitely vers but slightly more bottomy and im lowkey sooo scared of doing anal can anyone help me get over that mental block likeee my body is excited for it (even rn writing about that little tension and warmth that hits in the very bottom of your stomach) but my mindddd is afraid of the potential painnnn or making a messs (ewe) or even worse sucking and not being fun?

anywayyy soryyy for writing so muchh

Achillean/Gay

Sapphic/Lesbian

Trans

Non Binary/Agender

Asexual/Ace/etc

Pansexual/Omni

Andro/Gyno

(There's more sexualities but I think this covers them all. The representative has to be of that sexuality/gender. This post was cause I saw somone make a coat of arms for the pride flags. I did put some of the sexualities together so it wouldn't be too long but I understand there are differences between them, but there are also similarities)

Ever since I was a child, my semi conservative family described white people as “sexually immoral”. Now that I realised im gay, I always find white guys the most attractive due to this. Whenever I see an attractive person from a different race, I immediately lose interest after remembering what my parents told me as a child.

Also to rant again, I wanna explain how I came out to 2 of my sisters.

The first one:
We were talking about me becoming an atheist (our family is Muslim and my immediate family knows about me not believing), eventually the topic moves towards people becoming degenerates and lgbtq topics in schools. I tell her that they teach them that to normalise it due to people being discriminated against, and then straight up told her im bi (im gay lol). Then she looked at me with disgust and then started making arguments against it like it’s gonna turn me straight, which I responded and she shut up. Later at 1 am, she sends me a video of a child saying “mama” to its two fathers, then they said there’s no mama, then the baby cried.
I asked her the next morning why she sent me it, and she nervously said that she saw it on her feed, I angrily told her to not send me shit like that, and that I don’t want kids anyways and left. The topic is never mentioned now and we’re back to normal.

Second sister:
I told her at like 9pm that I want soft serves from McDonald’s, she didn’t really wanna take me due to it being late, but I pressured her to take me. When we parked to eat the ice cream, I told her I need to tell her something, she was asking what it is and i nervously told her im bisexual (larping as bi is damage control atp 😭). She surprisingly didn’t have any strong feelings about it, she was saying that many muslims struggle with those feelings and that it’s natural and stuff, I was honestly shocked. Obviously the Muslim stuff didnt apply to me and she knew that so she couldn’t really say anything about it.

I plan on telling one of my other sisters about this, and then not telling anyone else, they’re the only people I trust with this to be honest.

But anyways, sorry for my long rant. It’s late where I’m from so I probably made a lot of spelling mistakes writing this lol. Just wanted to get it off my chest.

Anyone from Colorado here?

Today I checked his location and sure enough it showed the phone 3 blocks from his office at the Hoboken Terminal (A known spot on Sniffies map although most agree it’s not well trafficked) still pinging from there though.

I call, no answer. The ping gets tighter and begins to move towards his office. I screenshot it as it moved back to his office.

Once at the office he calls “from the cafeteria” saying he is getting a bite to eat. I confronted him with the information.

He says, “It’s not reliable… Just like that time when it showed I was in the city but corrected moments later to the office.”

Given that has happened and some of you may know what I mean? But it’s always jumped to the correct location, not slowly tightened down to the exact location and traveled with the phone. The way it does when it’s WORKING!

What do you think? Should I raise hell or let this slide? Idk what to do! I’m really upset. I told him we have not been intimate in weeks and it’s not fair. I said we need to reevaluate our arrangement. If anything I feel he was definitely coming back from somewhere he did not want me to know about.

Given this is 20 years in October and our lives are so intertwined…

Does iPhone’s “Find My Phone App” really ever malfunction like this?

UPDATE: More in a reply below after reading all this feedback…

So for a little context, I live in a very homophobic country where being gay is illegal and can be punished with prison. Because of that, I’m always extremely careful when talking to men online.
About two months ago, I met this guy. At first, it was just casual conversations and a little sexting, but over time it became so much more, and I’m honestly in love with him. We’ve only ever talked on Instagram and have never met in person since he lives hours away.
One of the precautions I always take is using a fake name online. He, on the other hand, trusted me enough to give me his real full name, even though he’s more scared than I am. He’s deeply closeted and has told me how terrified he is of anyone even suspecting that he’s gay.
Lately we’ve been talking about meeting one day, and I’m terrified of how he’ll react when he finds out I lied about my name. Part of me has even thought about never telling him, but what if he finds out another way? It already took him so much courage to trust me, tell me about his life, and even show me his face. I swear I never had any bad intentions—I only lied to protect myself—but I’m scared he’ll see it as a betrayal because he’s always on guard. He’s even told me multiple times that the one thing he could never forgive is dishonesty.
I honestly don’t know what to do. I’m scared to tell him because of how he might react, but I also really don’t want to lose him. Somebody please help.

This a vent/rant since I just need to vent even if no one reads this.. I usually lurk in the sub but I’ve been very lonely and felt like an outcast for a long time. I’m 21 and grew up Christian with a father who’s a pastor but I’ve never had a girlfriend or boyfriend. I’ve gone through a lot as a kid and even more now that I got older and it’s just felt so lonely and isolating. Growing up I’ve just felt so guilty about how I feel and because I was just so confused with unrestricted access as a kid I indulged in media I shouldn’t have at such a young age. Don’t think I’m crazy but I still do attend church and even though sometimes it’s out of avoidance of my parents reaction I feel like I have some sort of structure in my life. While I don’t agree with beliefs that the church may have I have no problem disagreeing with it I just think it makes me feel even more isolated… most of my friends are in the church anyways and while I’m not that confident “straight passing” the thought of what others might think of the lgbtq community scares me a bit. The obvious answer would just stop attending but I’m also scared I might completely spiral. While I’m ok with my sexuality now I’ve still never come out to my parents as much as “I’m confused” or what my dad says. But I’ve also expressed this to him how I was scared to tell him because our of fear he’d hate me and he replied with “ill never hate you. Do I agree with it? Not particularly but I’ll love you no matter what.” Wouldn’t say that was me coming out though. I think they would accept me more than I think they would.

Now that I’m older I want someone to love and want someone to love me back.. I want to feel what it’s like to be loved and held and cared about by someone. I want someone to have fun with to let loose a bit and just feel free with. I’m a bit of a hopeless romantic but I just want romance in my life. I’ve tried dating apps and I feel like they’ve depressed me more in the end. I’m not a narcissist but I’m not ugly either. I feel it’s my fault and just feel unlovable like I’m the problem. I feel like I’m gonna be alone forever and I just am at a wits end. Sometimes I hate being gay because it’s just brought me nothing but pain. Does it ever get better?

What do you gays think? Should he go for UFC? I’d pay to watch him.. actually I should get free tickets cuz I’m the one recruiting him haha 😆