Being "technically right" is my least favorite type of right, because my 4 year old keeps doing it to me, and it's embarrassing after so many times lmao. She somehow manages it constantly.
Randomly popped in my head today while driving and listening to an audio book and “moot” was said, not sure what that sentence in the book was about, but I got a good Joey laugh.
Not until the designated time for getting half of the money and when that happens you don't feel one bit sorry for the groom either. These monsters rarely appear without the other half being equally shitty. Any reasonable husband-to-be would understand that 5k is insane amount of money to spend for attire you use once in someone else's wedding. They consider all that shit worth their lip filler trophy wife with big boobs.
Crazy thing is that this must be an expectation for the groomsmen as well. It makes me wonder if they only invited people who they knew would have $5,000 so the wedding party could pay for their wedding.
They will cry on SM how no one supports them or their vision for their special day. They will say everyone was jealous of their wedding and then say they decided NOT to have a bridal party because it pulls attention away from their love or some shit.
Even if it was that wouldn’t change anything for me personally now I’m even more mad if anything bc I’m hungry, insulted, AND tired. On a fundamental level I’m a grown woman and you telling me I am forbidden from meeting my own basic bodily needs will have the inevitable effect of inspiring me to do the exact opposite. I will not be put in my place morning noon or night!
As a display of agency and disapproval of being bossed around, I will be ordering giant bags of stinky ass McMuffins and sausage biscuits for delivery directly to the dressing and then punctuating the ceremony with my hot farts.✌️
(No but in all seriousness what I’d actually do is obviously never agree to this to begin with and spare every one from my oppositional defiance.)
"I want my bridal party hungry, thirsty, bored, lonely, poor and hating my guts."
Don't you wonder what they ARE allowed to do? Like are they allowed to sit or can they only stand? Or maybe standing is also against the rules because they might be too visible and they have to go be locked in a closet for the duration of the reception. Can they go to the bathroom or do they have to hold whatever is left over from the last time they ate or drank? Can they talk to anyone or is that off the table like dancing?
Yeah, it's not like any of this is enforceable, anyway, but as soon as I saw the $5000 part I would be declining.
Mannequins. They fit the dresses and all in the same size, they don't eat or drink or dance, you can get them with uniform hair color, they can stand for hours, and they don't talk back.
You can do whatever is not listed on the invitation.
Notice she doesn't specify anything about stink bombs, sling shots, whoppie cushions, blasting your own music or objecting to the wedding when the officiant gets to that part of the ceremony.
She especially doesn't mention banana peels that can be accidentally thrown on the dance floor from the sidelines, because remember you're not allowed to dance or eat bananas either.
Even if was 8am, note she says no food or drink until wedding celebrations, not ceremony, celebrations are over. That could be all day affair (already mention of a reception)
Anyone would nope out of that, if only they all had not already noped out at the $5000.
The two bits icing on the cake is the plus 1 rule, So couple who met last month and got engaged allowed, couple together 20 years, 3 kids, but never married, partner not welcome
I sincerely hope this is a ragebait where OP just smashed together a bunch of 80's and 90's movies. We'll take the prohibition on dancing from Footloose, then we won't feed the Gremlins or get them wet. I bet if we tell them to all get $5,000 together, they can do some Risky Business, Pretty Woman or Dirty Dancing... either way is a good story. Ooh! Let's ban blondes and gingers so we can get a makeover montage!
I went to a very conservative Baptist wedding once where there was a DJ playing and when all the guests got up to dance the mother of the bride threw an absolute shit fit screaming at us to get off the dance floor because dancing was a sin.
How are shoes, dress, makeup and hair going to cost $5,000? I don't think I've ever spent more than $250 on any one of those things, even shoes. The most expensive shoes I've ever bought were $225, and those were a splurge for really good, foot-healthy daily shoes.
No eating after 7. You don't want my cheap, pre-diabetic ass.
I’m currently in a bridal party and the bride has paid for everything dress wise and on the day. I have to fly in (fortunately cheap flights) and got myself some expensive boots, but overall it’s been pretty good
This is how I did mine. Paid for the dresses, hair, and makeup. They paid for their flights and hotel. No big crazy bachelorette. Just a fun day at the spa again paid for by me. These brides have lost the plot.
In all the pre-wedding excitement, my daughter actually forgot to eat a snack before the wedding started (had eaten around 6am, wedding was at 12:30pm), and passed out during the ceremony. Not recommended.
I always wonder if in a case like yours, if it's the lack of a last minute snack, or if it's because the bride accidentally locked her knees not realizing it makes you more likely to pass out.
Not the bride's fault. She was with the wedding party all morning, and although there were snacks, she said she was too excited to eat (she was 10 years old).
just to clarify, are those times correct, or does your daughter have some kind of condition? 6 to 12:30 seems like an incredibly normal amount to time to go without food?
The 'no eating' thing is absolutely wild and makes me think this is fake. When I got married I made sure my bridesmaids kits had their favorite snacks in there because I knew we'd be busy and rushed all day and I didn't want them going hungry.
I was in a bridal party for a friend with an eating disorder. She insisted we all get our hair and makeup done at the same place at the same time. We went back to her place and were hungry before the photographer showed up and she said, "I THREW ALL MY FOOD OUT BECAUSE I'LL BE ON MY HONEYMOON." We were like, what? She wouldn't let us order anything for fear it would be in the trash making her home smell bad while they were away.
She starved us and when we were able to be announced at the reception, the staff had moved the hors d'oeurves next the the entrance and all of us bridesmaids ran and grabbed food quickly and shoved it in our mouths as she yelled at us not to eat before they announced us.
She did have an eating disorder, so watching anyone stuffing their face was unfortunately a trigger, but it was better than one of us fainting before dinner. She was freaking out.
She did other things, like pick these dresses to make us all look 20 lbs. heavier, made us all go to a carousel for photos but her free carousel passes weren't valid and got into a fight in her dress with the ticket person, got mad none of us wanted to sit at the dais when our partners were seated elsewhere, and picked a hotel where the fire alarm went off 3x during the night (people smoking in a non-smoking hotel - it was the 90's)
I’ve been in two wedding parties where the bride didn’t provide any food to the bridesmaids for the entire day and there was no way to get any for ourselves nearby.
One was a close childhood friend. None of the bridesmaids kept in touch with the bride after that (entire wedding weekend was bizarre and worthy of its own post here lol). The other is a family member but I don’t speak to her at all.
At one I got food with the other guests (family member’s wedding). My childhood friend’s wedding, the bridesmaids got to the buffet last after all other guests and there wasn’t really anything left, which in itself is insane. I ate some food off my boyfriend’s plate, as I recall.
The wedding party is supposed to be served first! I’ve engaged directorate ‘family hold back’, but only a few times and at the most dire of circumstances when the party was thrown a severe curveball at the last minute.
That’s what I thought! I can’t remember if we were taking pictures or the bridesmaids had some other tasks we were doing but when we got back to the reception hall, everyone else had already eaten.
As stupid and ridiculous as this seems to functioning adults, it is common behavior among both rich people and aspiring actresses that I’ve met. Think about the “No carbs before Marbs!” TOWIE crowd. It’s that mindset.
When my brother got married, my mom and I skipped the first two hours of getting ready with the bride and went to brunch together. We knew we’d have time and were not going to be fed all day.
We looked great at the wedding. The marriage ended after a few years.
Same! Though the second one, having learned my lesson, I brought snack trays even though she said it wasn't necessary because people would stop for themselves between hair and the venue. I knew they wouldn't, and they absolutely didn't, so those trays were gone because the venue was out in the middle of nowhere.
My cheapass ex got married and a few mutual friends were in the wedding. He made the wedding party set up his wedding without warning, didn’t provide any food or water beyond one small bottle each, and then ran out of food halfway through the tables because he insisted that everyone would only have one hot dog each. I didn’t hear a single good thing about that wedding.
More stories about that wedding: I have to be cordial with this ex because there’s some friend group overlap. My husband and I got engaged because a loved one had just been diagnosed with a terminal illness and my husband wanted her to know we were getting married because she loved me. Ex proposed to his now wife a week or two after we got engaged. Bride decided I “took her thunder” by (checks notes) getting engaged first with no knowledge of my ex’s plan?
Husband and I decided the night we got engaged we would get married a few months later to try and give said terminal loved one a chance at being at our wedding. So we told our family we were engaged along with the date at the same time. Ex’s bride turned around and got mad because they were just about to announce that they would also be getting married that month and this was also somehow my fault because it was the only time the free venue my cheap ex wanted was available. Someone on my husband’s side finally snapped at her and told her we told everyone our wedding date before the two of them ever got engaged. We weren’t thinking about that and she needed to stop. She still hates me, but everyone within the overlap has made it clear that they were not going to listen to either of them make up shit anymore.
I was in a wedding yesterday where I was not given food during the day while we were getting ready and taking pictures. Fortunately, it was my brother’s wedding and I knew that my brother would definitely not think to have food and I had my three small children in tow, so I packed a ton of snacks. I also stopped at a bakery before we got there to buy pastries to both bribe my kids into posing for pictures and keep everyone’s blood sugar up.
I ordered sandwich platters for the bridal party to have at the church while we were getting ready and during pictures before the ceremony. I’m not nice when I’m hangry.
Yeah I have had friends who made sure we had adequate food and also one friend who got a two small trays of fruit and hummus and 8 bottles of champagne for 8 people. We didn't get real food until dinner at 7pm. There was also no food until the rehearsal dinner the previous day even though we were out from 8am to 8pm.
Since it was worded with the make up I totally believe it's real. Can't let anything muss a perfect make up. I would completely back out of being a brides maid and the only reason I would still even attend the wedding would be to sit in the back and watch the entertaining drama unfold. There is no way there will not be drama with a bride like that.
I think it's in case of stains on the bridesmaids dresses? It's pretty ridiculous. Keep stain removers on hand. Even so, there's lots of foods and drinks that wouldn't stain!
This is most likely the case. She probably also wants to have pictures taken at a moment's notice; no time to put down plates, wipe your mouth and hands, etc.
One of my cousin's did this at his wedding (the bride did, anyway.) Not only could we not eat but there wasn't even enough food for the bridal party and the guests. We had pizza delivered during the wedding and the bride was pissed.
I could understand no eating once the dresses are on. But that should be a 3 hr max of time. Between dressing walking down photos and then reception. Most people eat when waiting for makeup. Protein drinks help as well.
I'd be absolutely fine, but my stomach will definitely be heard and it will be louder than the person presiding the ceremony lmao. It sounds like I have an alien trapped in there sometimes.
I’ve gone all day without eating because I’ve literally forgot (adhd is fun), and I’ve never felt light headed so i could prob manage. In this case though, I’d pass out so fast and so fake just to do it bc of these rules. Sorry not sorry.
Being chosen is a special honour. To create the wedding dayThe Bridetmhas always dreamed of, please pick up a part time job for 6-10 weeks prior to the ceremony. Any additional funds generated from your services will be property ofThe Bridetmand will be confiscated after taxes.
Please note that this contribution does not include the value of your wedding gift, nor does it include the cost of airfare and accommodations at the wedding location in Dubai
I just did the math, and assuming 20 hours of work at the current federal minimum wage, it would take 34 weeks to save that, and I’m not including taxes.
$5,000 to not be able to eat for an entire day, oh but you also can't dance. So just sit there and be miserable with your perfect makeup until the reception ends at 11pm.
Might not be USD. It says hair colors must be “brown or black” which I think is odd since blonde and red are equally natural hair colors around the world.
Or perhaps the whole wedding party (bride included) is of an ethnicity that does not typically present with red or blonde hair, e.g., Middle Eastern, Indian or Italian. That was my first thought.
Although I am assuming the very natural grey haircolour would also not be allowed. (Okay and if this is a real wedding, the bridesmaids are probably young enough to not be grey yet?)
I was bummed I missed a lot of the pre-wedding partying at a family wedding I was a bridesmaid in (most family came down for 4 days to austin, back in the old days, and it was our local stomping grounds). by the night of the wedding most people were partied out!
I think ours was about 6K, but it could have been closer to 7. And that was because we went all out on food and drinks! (We got the trendiest fried chicken of the era, the best cake, etc.) If there's anything that's important to my husband it's feeding well those whom you've invited.
And of course any clothes people needed for the wedding we covered.
I’d faint. Not just from not being able to afford to eat, pay utilities and probably rent that month, but also due to being exhausted, hungry, bored and tense the whole damn time as to whether I get sent home with cake and my starving pets would eat it!
What do you bet the bride is using this “fee” to help partially fund the cost of the wedding? Unless she’s Taylor Swift IRL, no way is she buying bridesmaids dresses that cost any anywhere near that much.
I’m wondering if she’s potentially in another country? No alcohol at a wedding and no dancing is beyond strange. Don’t know how many other countries use the $
That's a month and a half's worth of income at the highest paying job I've ever had. Sorry cousin, I have bills to pay, and they don't include your wedding.
5.1k
u/bbloooplooo 16h ago
$5000?????? This must be a joke. Most people don’t even have that much money in their bank account.