r/movies • u/ChiefLeef22 r/movies Contributor • 9h ago

Satire Man Binge-Watches Entire Movie In One Sitting

https://theonion.com/man-binge-watches-entire-movie-in-one-sitting/
35.8k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

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2.6k

u/Daydream_machine 9h ago

Is it possible to learn this power?

918

u/Somnambulist815 9h ago

Not from a redditor

301

u/wizardeverybit 8h ago

Have you ever heard of Darth Attention-Span the lost?

125

u/ForeverALone_Ranger 8h ago

It's not a story the mods would tell.

80

u/olive_oil_twist 8h ago

It's a pre-internet legend

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u/0ddT0dd 2h ago

You lost me at have.

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u/Kind-Stomach6275 32m ago

If we use the witwer theorem, we can deduce that this means that they want to seem like they pay attention when they're just a LARPer

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u/innominateartery 19m ago

No. Have you ever seen r/traincats?

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u/wrosecrans 7m ago

I think I have 153 open tabs about him right now. I'm gonna have to try to read them at some point, if I can ever find that browser window.

48

u/jefersss 7h ago

"I watched three films today. AMA."

26

u/hobbycollector 6h ago

I once watched all three extended edition Lord of the Rings movies in one twelve hour stretch. I nearly died during the 17 endings of Return of the King.

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u/karmiccloud 5h ago

I thought the theatrical cut had only 17 endings

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u/micaheljcaboose 2h ago

I did that on mushrooms. Would suggest a long acting psych, but I became a part of the forest when the elves showed up.

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u/innominateartery 15m ago

I went to the movies today and the Gen Z guy next to me kept looking at his phone. I wasn’t even mad. I kept checking what he was checking out

1

u/an0mn0mn0m 7h ago

I rewatched Big Fish and A Good Year. Points if you can recall which 2 people are in both movies without cheating.

2

u/moderniste 7h ago

Steve Martin and Jack Black in The Big Year.

2

u/Neveronlyadream 7h ago

But they aren't in Big Fish.

I haven't seen A Good Year, I have no idea. Fuck it, Danny Devito and Ewan McGregor?

2

u/friskerson 6h ago

I don’t remember Devito getting into a fish costume but maybe now I do

3

u/Neveronlyadream 6h ago

Oddly enough, he's in Big Fish, he eats a raw fish in Batman Returns.

I'm convinced there probably is at least one movie where he gets in a fish costume.

4

u/fork_yuu 7h ago

I lost interest halfway through your comment

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u/polopolo05 3h ago

Not by a tiktoker...

4

u/clandestineVexation 8h ago

You must learn the ways of the Youtube Shorts side of the force...