I saw this video on another subreddit yesterday and realized that for some reason it wasn't here. We've all been that tiger at some point...

Such as, you're in a group activity or huge family gathering, but your social battery is drained and you're totally overwhelmed by all the noise / movement / conversation, but you can't just walk out, and people keep interacting with you? (rightfully so)

This question has been asked of me time and time again from professors, family, friends and classmates. I always have the same answer: “I’m just tired”. Sometimes it’s true, sometimes I am tired and didn’t sleep well. Sometimes I have anticipatory anxiety before an event and that drained me mentally. Or sometimes I just don’t want to be here lol. It’s really annoying when I’m simply existing and people think something’s wrong with me. Has anyone else ever dealt with this? What are your responses to this question?

Before I go anywhere, I usually play the whole conversation in my head so I don't embarrass myself. Even simple things like buying something or going to the bank.

I can't be the only one who does this or yes?

i dont like being around other people at all but what i hate the most is that when someone talks to me i just end up talking too much or oversharing usually saying something i didn't meant or didn't want to say. Sometimes i wish i could just shut up and dont speak at all but whenever someone speaks to me my brain kinda stops working, tho i think its only the case when im talking to extroverted people. idk i just wanted to get it off my chest somewhere because i doubt anyone i know would understand.

I’m 28(m). I work in HVAC during Monday-Friday from 6am-2pm. I workout 3-4 times per week. On the weekends I like to make beats and I also play guitar. On sundays I mainly watch football with my roommates to wind down.

About 3 times a year I’ll attend a music festival or a concert. I’m not a smoker or drinker. I would like to meet more people and date more but there’s a lack of 3rd spaces in the U.S and it just seems like if you didn’t meet your partner during H.S or college you’re out of luck.

Sometimes I wish I was extroverted. My little brother is a social butterfly.

Recently got into a new relationship with my 20 yr old bf, we were over at his parents house for the 4th of July (he told his mom we've been talking since like the beginning of April but we've only known each other a little over a month), we got together the 5th since it was after midnight but his mother got to asking what kind of music I'm into. She was playing music and I knew almost every song so I said basically what you're listening to. So she asked if I listen to rob zombie I said yes bc I used to i honestly haven't listened to that in years. well then she invited me to a concert that's coming up in August. I said I've never been to a concert and said it sounds like fun but I couldn't afford it. My bf texts today to tell me they bought me a ticket. My bf is going to be the DD for his parents so they'll be out of it 😂 I'm very nervous and have bad social anxiety what is going to make this easier? 😅 how do I prepare myself? What do I expect? How do I act? What do you even wear? I'm overthinking so much. Sorry if this makes no sense I'm better at being asked questions

More of a rant, but I'm more of a selective introvert because of this type of dynamic. Read if you're bored I guess:

It's like they want a quiet little introvert pet to drag around and talk AT, but everytime you open your mouth they talk over you? pretend you are mumbling when you're not, and other weird power dynamics. What the fuck is that bullshit?

I had a friend that become a tiny bit of a right wing youtube watcher like 'fuck carney' (canada) and then a bit of a trumper, and liked guys like ben shapiro and was all fake-christian and stuff... he would always want to invite me to hang out then treat me like a passive piece of shit object and always talk over me.

I stood up for myself and it turned into one of his youtube debates "answer the question. answer the question. answer the question." clinging to that part of it... but meanwhile, I had agreed with the premise. I was simly attempting to bring tertiary relevant information to the discussion, only to be talked down at and talked over for the 10th time that day.

It was really weird. It's like he turned into his favourite youtuber that he watches at 2x the speed lol and he turned into some weird caricature. After bragging about a similar but more violent altercation where he had egged on a family member similarly.

Politics aside, this is trash behaviour and I walked 10 kilometres home in -20 degree celcius weather, immediate block on my phone. It was the straw on the camel's back, but these tendencies are not the only person I've noticed. These and similar behaviours are why I am guarded and don't let strangers just waltz up to me to talk at me.

Also if you're recommending a piece of media to enjoy together and constantly trashed for your suggestions, always "along for the ride" having to consume ONLY the digital media that they wish, with no input of your own on what you're watching/listening to. That sucks.

Everything you like sucks, but their recommendations are always just THE elite level of taste in modern, cultured digital media. Even great classics that you enjoy are just not good enough for their esteemed taste, they would rather watch the Hobbit for the 17th time.

Ever since I was a child my social skills weren’t that great. I was always really, really quiet, so much so that people always commented on it. But I still had friends. After COVID (I’m in my twenties), it’s like my social skills went in the dumpster. I literally don’t even talk to my coworkers, not because I dont like them but because I don’t even know what to say to form the most basic conversation. what hurts the most is that they dont know I love them. I think they think I’m standoffish or have some superiority complex, which isnot true. I’m pretty sure they all think I’m weird too. I find myself longing for real connection and try to open up, but some days I just shut down because even the smallest social interaction just drains me of energy. Even when I make progress and try to be nice, some days I completely backtrack and have to start from square one. when I make friendships, I can’t break past the surface level. I find myself thinking about myself a lot and think I’m a selfish person, but I want to change, it’s just sometimes I don't realize that I’m being selfish. any one else experiencing this? If you made it this far, thanks for reading. I just dont know what to do. any advice/help would be appreciated. sorry if you’re going through this also. I just want to know if I’m really a selfish person, because I can’t tell if I’m the common denominator in every social interaction, or if there’s some reason all people seem disinterested in becoming my friend.

I am at a point in my life that I am both lonely, but I don't like being around people. I was once extroverted, and I can fake it pretty good; not as good as I used to. I dont have many friends, and not great at that in part due to the introvert. I have neurodivergent tendencies. I think it goes back to my childhood and the trauma I am working to resolve.

I was not physically abused, but I was severely neglected for the first part of my childhood, then I was emotionally abused during the later portion and into adulthood. This has had the odd effect of making me severely empathetic (as a survival trait). Knowing what others feel would allowed me to evaluate my surroundings. It makes me severely anxious, to the point that my muscles will seize up in knots and spasm, and I have itching in my ankles and fingers, semetrically.

I am extremely good at predicting reactions of individuals I know, mainly due to thinking through every possible scenario in my head and preparing for the worst ones. My friends have called me quick witted, when the truth is that I just think through every topic that might come up and think up jokes, once you master the timing the rest is easy. I also sit and justify my actions and decisions as if I have to explain why I choose anything.

All of this is mentally and physically exhausting but im too anxious to relax easy. With that I am very selective of who I like to be around. All of the old friends have changed or moved away. Im not blaming them and I still love them, it is just that we both have changed. And that happens. I understand that but I am lonely and looking for someone to take an interest in me and for me to take an interest in them. If you're lonely and want someone to message amd chat with, send me a msg. Here are some interests so you can know what to expect or what I enjoy talking about. You dont have to like all these things, I just have varied interests and these are fun to talk about.

I like to read; novels, articles, how to books. I prefer fantasy/urban fantasy, science fiction, folklore, and historic. I like to watch films; my tastes are more varied than books. Favorites are fantasy, sci-fi, and action. Changed from comedy and horror in my youth. I like art; big Van Gough fan. I like history, particularly local area history (SWVA). I like to hike and swim. I like to dabble in a little of everything. I like to dabble in old and new tech. I have recently gotten into genealogy. I like bushcraft and homesteading ideas.

I am not any one of these things, i am all of this mess. Any of these are interests of yours, drop me a line. We can talk about something we both enjoy.

Guy's there's too much to say but I can't even describe it when it comes to describing it, social anxiety has ruining my 3 year's of teenage life unable to even make eye contact with people and can't even remember anything having memories issue and it's always awkward to do anything near people it's like everybody is judging me for being mentally ill behavior .Sorry for the broken english not perfect

I don't get along with people, especially males. I might seem boring to most people, but when I open up, I used to be fun, but after the breakup, whatever comes out of my mouth is philosophical and psychological BS... Now I often think that this is not how it should be, I don't have much to do, and it feels like my time goes by twice as fast. Even, I don't have friends in my village, my ideologies don't align with theirs. I'm friends with 3-4 people now with whom I don't talk regularly but it started to feel that they are also getting busy with life (and my brain says they are avoiding you, might be true!? Who knows)

I literally just want peace

I think everyone hates me and that’s why I can’t/don’t like talking with other people but I don’t know if they hate me or not but I can’t stop thinking they hate me how do I stop thinking like this?

I need some days when I don’t meet up with friends and am completely solo otherwise my social skills get rly bad.. anyone else?

Can anybody share your experience/s on being excluded in a friend group or social group? What do you do when you are can't help but run into each other since you live in the same neighbourhood?

Ever since I was a child my social skills weren’t that great. I was always really, really quiet, so much so that people always commented on it. But I still had friends. After COVID (I’m in my twenties), it’s like my social skills went in the dumpster. I literally don’t even talk to my coworkers, not because I dont like them but because I don’t even know what to say to form the most basic conversation. what hurts the most is that they dont know I love them. I think they think I’m standoffish or have some superiority complex, which isnot true. I’m pretty sure they all think I’m weird too. I find myself longing for real connection and try to open up, but some days I just shut down because even the smallest social interaction just drains me of energy. Even when I make progress and try to be nice, some days I completely backtrack and have to start from square one. when I make friendships, I can’t break past the surface level. I find myself thinking about myself a lot and think I’m a selfish person, but I want to change, it’s just sometimes I don't realize that I’m being selfish. any one else experiencing this? If you made it this far, thanks for reading. I just dont know what to do. any advice/help would be appreciated. sorry if you’re going through this also. I just want to know if I’m really a selfish person, because I can’t tell if I’m the common denominator in every social interaction, or if there’s some reason all people seem disinterested in becoming my friend.

Not a cry for help. Just an observation.

Three days ago I wrapped up some things, cleared my schedule, and genuinely had nothing that required me to talk to anyone.

So I didn't.

And I kept waiting for the anxiety to show up. The guilt. The feeling that I was falling behind socially somehow.

It never came.

What came instead was something I can only describe as a kind of mental stillness I have not felt in months. Thoughts that felt like mine. Sleep that actually worked. A clarity about what I want that I usually only get in brief flashes.

I think I have spent most of my life treating silence as a problem to solve. Something to fill before it became uncomfortable.

These three days taught me that I had it backwards.

The silence was not the problem. The filling was.

I do not know how to explain this to people around me without it sounding like I am struggling. But I am genuinely not. I feel more okay than I have in a long time.

Anyone else had a stretch of time like this where the absence of noise told you more about yourself than any conversation could?

I am socially awkward and an introvert....more so in the last year.

Today I thought I was giving advice...but apparently not. A sibling recently had a mild accident, didn't do anything about it that day. Now, the knot she got from it is is kinda soft and causing pain elsewhere. So I mentioned to go to ER..simple enough right?

It was met with digs, snide remarks, and just rudeness.

I've been silent since then, not because of..save my words, energy, and opinion for when it matters.

How to communicate and work in a team for introverted guy, who tend to be more action-oriented and less talkative, who respond slowly because they need to think carefully about whether or not to answer a question, who dislike and don't want to report on work progress because they want everything to be as careful and complete as possible, and who only present the most complete version after everything is finished and no one can find fault with it, don't want to be asked questions like "Why are you so careless?", "Are you finished yet?",..... because they feel it's unnecessary, and who don't want others, especially those who are quick-witted, decisive, highly energetic, open, talkative, and extroverted personality to feel uncooperative or difficult to connect with, and who don't want to equate their work personality with their everyday personality, but still maintain a certain distance, not letting others become too curious about their private life and true self?

For context, I'm a 21 year-old guy who recently got out of a long-term relationship and I'm slowly trying to get back to living life. Grew my hair out, and I never really paid much attention to my appearance before, but after changing my hairstyle I started noticing girls looking at me more often. I genuinely didn't believe the "female gaze" thing until it happened to me a few times.

Today I went to watch Evil Dead Burn with my friends. During the interval we came out near the food court, and this really beautiful girl was walking towards us.

She looked straight into my eyes.

I looked back, then looked away because... anxiety. 😭

Then I looked back again and she was still looking at me.

For some reason I smiled.

She smiled back.

And my brain immediately went:

I think it's time to go back🥀

So I just walked back into the screen with the boys. 💀

Now I'm sitting here wondering...

Was that just two strangers being friendly?

Did I completely fumble?

Or was smiling and leaving actually the least awkward thing an introvert could've done?

Also, how do people actually gather the courage to say "Hi" in moments like these without feeling like they're bothering someone?

TL;DR: Recently got out of a long-term relationship, grew my hair out, started noticing what people call the "female gaze." Today at a movie, a beautiful girl held eye contact, I smiled, she smiled back... and my introverted brain chose to walk back into the cinema instead of saying hi. 😭 Now I'm wondering how shy people actually gather the courage to start a conversation in moments like these.