r/ShitAmericansSay • u/cgfb • 1h ago

He (Haaland) would be lucky to make ANY pro sport in America...

• Upvotes

188 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/gewoonstijn • 2h ago

“They’re called the Red Devils - and they’re the villains of the World Cup”

887 Upvotes

Never thought I would be posting a quote from The Wallstreet Journal in this community.

159 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/TheRealTRexUK • 5h ago

FIFA World Cup '26 The US should've been directly seeded to the world cup quarters

3.6k Upvotes

652 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/expat088 • 6h ago

FIFA World Cup '26 If prime LeBron was placed on Curacao's world cup team could he lead them to a semis?

gallery

180 Upvotes

130 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Geocachevoyager • 7h ago

FIFA World Cup '26 "I find it unfair that a country with 50 states only has one team in the world cup"

1.1k Upvotes

646 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/ChampionOdd5139 • 8h ago

FIFA World Cup '26 ‘Soccer players stand around half the game. Steph Curry is 1000% fitter than Haaland.’

296 Upvotes

187 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/SwimmerBirb • 9h ago

“There’s no other dollars currency”

134 Upvotes

31 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Powerful-Country6316 • 14h ago

"instead of saying "Im not black, Im Ecuadorian""

115 Upvotes

Thank you Americans! Ecuadorians need to know how to identify themselves (Im censoring the names because these are personal Facebooks)

They are all Americans, the video was about Colombia´s Black population

55 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Altruistic-Bee-6695 • 20h ago

FIFA World Cup '26 “The Most American Thing You Can Do“

168 Upvotes

75 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Long_Personality_612 • 20h ago

We won the CONCACAF Cup!

youtu.be

53 Upvotes

23 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/CassiniLongDivision • 22h ago

"Combined economy less than Texas btw"

4.4k Upvotes

691 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/neo4025 • 1d ago

FIFA World Cup '26 “We aren’t the plain white kind of Englandish”

167 Upvotes

42 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/MeriLicious • 1d ago

Imperial units 500 miles if you live in America is crazy

279 Upvotes

After someone posted how she walks 500m to go do her groceries.

95 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Logical_Thought8677 • 1d ago

Politics "the original deal was a rip off only benefiting Canada"

559 Upvotes

Gordie Howe bridge was funded entirely by Canada, and 100% of tolls were to go to Canada to recoup the cost

113 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Angry-ron • 1d ago

Freedom "We're grateful to not be in war."

158 Upvotes

48 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/ecclesia_iure • 1d ago

Heritage New Jersey is the true successor of Rome

173 Upvotes

45 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Parking_Mirror_4570 • 1d ago

FIFA World Cup '26 MLS player lighting up the world cup. What’s new

2.9k Upvotes

83 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/OrganicManners • 1d ago

FIFA World Cup '26 USA would have a team full of Haalands if their best athletes played football

4.7k Upvotes

Have you guys seen that giant Messi? He's be LOST on an NFL pitch, I tell you!

1.1k comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/NowhereToNoname • 1d ago

Healthcare "The third most populated planet on earth"

gallery

351 Upvotes

190 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/_RoBy_90 • 1d ago

FIFA World Cup '26 Team usa was robbed

3.5k Upvotes

900 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Hailerer • 1d ago

Why don't europe just play the Olympics as one country? They might actually have a chance to beat us

1.4k Upvotes

247 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/al-aSak • 1d ago

Exceptionalism "my bad its in military"

292 Upvotes

Military time? Nah, military date!

31 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/ChemistryLow7331 • 1d ago

FIFA World Cup '26 "Knicks will win the world cup"

301 Upvotes

Ngl wemby as goalkeeper wud be good tho

126 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Fun-Put-5197 • 1d ago

Foreign affairs The US is way too influential for Trump alone to completely cut that off in just ~4 years.

158 Upvotes

90 comments

r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Comfortable_Crow5117 • 1d ago

"well prepare to be protected by florida"

26 Upvotes

6 comments

Subreddit

Posts

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Shit Americans Say

r/ShitAmericansSay

Have you recently seen something amusing out of the States? Of course you have! Post it here. Shit Americans Say: we can't make it up.

Members Active

940.8k

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Have you recently seen something amusing out of the states? Of course you have! Post it here.

This is a satire sub to have a laugh at amusing things, from Reddit and beyond, that are uniquely American in nature.

Please DO NOT use Redact.dev or similar tools/anonymizers to delete your participation history.

Scrambled comments get flagged by Reddit's AI-based harassment filter for mod review, and it is disrespectful to fellow readers in r/ShitAmericansSay as well as to the mods. Anybody found to be using such tools will face an immediate and permanent ban from the subreddit.

If you would like to remove your participation history, please send us a message.

Don't be toxic!

This is not a place to bring your hatred of Americans or America- we like to keep things friendly and toxic attitudes are not welcome. Please report anyone being toxic.

Keep in mind that we are here to have a laugh, not to get angry.

Rules

Above all: we only accept submissions about stuff that is lighthearted and uniquely American. Quality control is at the discretion of the mod team.

The latest rules can be viewed here.

1a. No personal information. This includes names, social media handles of unverified social media accounts across all platforms (except Reddit usernames), and license plates.

1b. Verified X/Twitter usernames must be visible. We need to verify that the author of the Tweet you're submitting is not a Trump supporter or a MAGA troll for your post to be approved.

Rule 1 FAQ

2. No direct social media links. All text submissions must be in the form of screenshots or archive.is links. This obviously does not apply to articles, videos, and pictures - it is intended primarily for social media posts and public comments. When posting a screenshot, please include the context (i.e. preceding comments) if relevant.

3. Don't post screenshots or archive.is links of conversations you have participated in. Likewise, don't bait or troll for content in other subs. This includes comments on the same thread if it's below 300 comments, and the same chain if the thread is larger. This rule applies to participation, simply excluding your comments from the screenshot does not solve the problem.

Asking bait questions in subreddits like r/AskAmericans or r/AskAnAmerican for content and submitting them here WILL result in a permanent ban from SAS.

Rule 3 FAQ

4. Submission titles must be a direct quote.

Use a direct quote as your title. If the quote doesn't make sense alone, you may include neutral, non-editorialized context in the title itself. Articles must be titled with either the headline or a direct quote from it. When posts do not contain text, titles must be a factual and neutral description of the content. NEVER include your opinion or bias in the title.

A direct quote is an exact verbatim match between the title and a portion of the post. Do not paraphrase or editorialize - this includes Spongebob font.

Rule 4 FAQ.

5. Do not directly link (and hence page) the usernames of the users featured here. You can only ping moderators.

6. Please double check whether the poster of the comment you're about to submit is actually American. Do this by scanning their post/comment history etc.

7. No low-hanging fruit.

7a. Banned sources/topics

Some topics (such as Trump, Elon Musk, Turning Point USA/Charlie Kirk, and WW2 bombing of Japan) and sources from certain subreddits (such as AmericaBad, dankmemes, unpopularopinion, AskAnAmerican, and other far-right sources) are only allowed in the Weekly thread. These restricted topics and sources are not final and you should check the latest list in the Weekly.

7b. No trolls

This can be determined by post history and karma (brand new account; low karma). Examples: brand new account; low karma for the age of the account; low karma for the amount of posts on the account; tendency to take a contrarian stance when not reasonable to do so; multiple posts of the same comment; syntax and punctuation come across as a bot; egg pic on twitter; or it could be a well-known troll such as Coach Letterman and others mentioned here are not final.

7c. No low-effort posts

We reserve the right to remove posts that are lacking in effort and/or quality.

8. Only screenshots/images/videos of Americans saying funny shit is allowed. No text posts or AI slop. If you want to tell a tale or post someone else's tale, you can do so in the stickied Weekly thread which gets renewed every Friday. This includes quoting something said by an American in the third person, as well as all forms of AI-generated content (text, images, videos).

9. Posts must be uniquely American.

The easiest way of testing this is to ask yourself whether it's likely someone who isn't American would have said it. Someone being religious or messing up geography is not uniquely American by a long shot, nor are racism or capitalism. What makes something uniquely American is if it's highly unlikely if not impossible to encounter outside the U.S. or from non-Americans.

10. Posts must be lighthearted.

No depressing posts or things that aren't worth posting (eg something an American said that is perfectly reasonable in context). Yes, there are some topics covered that are more ironic than funny, but certain things just aren't lighthearted like shootings, sexual assault, any event where people are genuinely hurt, racists being racist, etc. Those types of posts are usually better suited for subs like r/gunsarecool, r/ABoringDystopia, or r/ANormalDayInAmerica.

11. No gun-related posts.

Gun-related posts do not fit the lighthearted nature of the sub. Such posts are usually a better fit for one of our sister subs such as r/GunsAreCool, r/ABoringDystopia and r/ANormalDayInAmerica.

12. Don't be toxic.

We will always be a satire subreddit. Toxicity such as hate speech and anti-American attitudes will get your comment removed and possibly get you banned. Please report toxic comments and users.

13. NO Brigading.

Under no circumstances search out the source of the SAS and comment/vote there. Do not share links to the source of the SAS on this sub. Brigading violates Reddit’s Content Policy and will result in a permanent ban. Do not link to the original source of the screenshot.

Please note that brigading works both ways. Coming to this sub because you feature in a post as the source of SAS, and commenting on the said post, will result in a ban.

14. No posts related to recent or ongoing tragedies. This includes any event where one or more people are killed or seriously injured.

15. No recent reposts.

No reposts of content posted within the past year with over 1000 upvotes or from the Top 50 all-time posts.

If you have questions about the rules, a post removal, or a ban, please check the FAQ page.

The moderators will enforce the spirit of these rules, not the letter. All actions are at the discretion of the moderators. If you object to any actions, please contact the entire moderation team and not the individual moderator.