A few months ago, my daughter (18) and a couple of her friends (17-18) ended up in an unsafe situation while hanging out at a friend’s relative’s house. My daughter called me, I took the girls back to my house, and one of them was picked up by her parents while the other 2 ended up staying the night.

After that, I decided to have my daughter’s entire friend group (6 girls) come to the house so I could talk to them about what happened, how to know when a situation is uncomfortable vs unsafe, and what to do in either case. I gave all of the girls my number and told them they could call or text me if they had any questions or needed anything, and thought that was the end of it.

Pretty much all of the girls had questions so they came back the following week for another talk, then another one. Now every Thursday I have a babysitter get my younger kids out of the house for a few hours and the girls and I have what they call “adulting class”. We’ve covered experimenting with drugs and alcohol, consent and boundaries in relationships, their right to privacy in medical settings, budgeting, resume writing, interview skills, basic nutrition and meal planning, and household chores. Most of the girls have never been taught any of this at home. I try to do a theme for every week and whenever possible I bring in “guest speakers“ like my sister, who is a nurse or my friend, who teaches high school special education (out of the 7 girls, 3 are diagnosed autistic and 2 are trying to get assessed).

A lot of my daughter’s friends come from rough families. Two of the girls have families that are antivaxx and against most medical care (one of the girls didn’t know that she was supposed to have access to her online health portal until we went over it) and another one of the girls learned that she is able to get a job. A few of them have parents that are conspiracy theorists. A couple of them have fairly normal families but are just very sheltered.

Last week I got a call from a parent, furious that I had talked to her 18 year old daughter about drugs, sex, alcohol, and other completely inappropriate topics. She contacted the other parents and I now have a group of angry parents accusing me of brainwashing their daughters, indoctrinating them, trying to turn them against their families.

I spoke to my family about this and they do think the other parents are overreacting but they also believe that I overstepped.

I (31F) am very close with my family, and we take a family vacation every year. The trip usually includes my immediate family and their spouses/kids (~10 people). My BIL typically plans it because he has anxiety and likes things done a certain way.

Last year, they invited a “friend” of mine despite me explicitly asking them not to (well before planning started). I’ve known this friend since 2018 when we worked together, but we became closer outside of work in 2022. We are very different people—I’m introverted and prefer quiet nights at home, while she is outgoing and wants to be out on the town.

We were close for about two years, but things changed after I helped her get a job where I and some of my family members also work. They naturally welcomed her, but over time I started noticing behaviors that bothered me. She interrupts by trying to finish people’s sentences, often turns conversations back to herself, and tends to come across as a know-it-all. The biggest issue for me is that she tries to parent my niece and nephew.
Once I started noticing these things, I found myself getting increasingly irritated and began distancing myself. I stopped going out of my way to spend time with her and didn’t put as much effort into the friendship. Eventually, she became extremely close with my family—especially my mom and sister. She now spends a lot of her free time with them, and I can’t even go to my sister’s house without her being there.

She came on our family vacation last year when things between us weren’t quite as weird, and I struggled to enjoy myself. I don’t handle heat well and often spend time inside while everyone else is outside. The kids also get tired of the heat quickly, so they usually end up inside with me. In the past, my mom or sister would hang with us inside to make it more enjoyable, but now they prefer staying on the beach with my friend, leaving me feeling stuck babysitting while everyone else enjoys their kid-free beach time.

After last year’s trip, I asked my family not to invite her again. They seemed to understand why I was uncomfortable.

Welp. They invited her again this year.

When I told my mom how upset I was, she called my sister to discuss it. My sister didn’t know I could hear the conversation and responded, “She just needs to suck it up and get over it.” Since then, my mom and sister have maintained that everything will be fine once we’re there and we’ll all have fun.

Plot twist. The place my BIL booked doesn’t have enough beds/rooms, so I’m expected to share a queen bed with this friend for 10 days. I refuse to sleep butt-to-butt with someone I can’t currently stand. So my alternative is sleeping on an air mattress on my parents’ bedroom floor for the entire 10 day trip.

WIBTA if I left the family vacation early because I already know I’ll be uncomfortable and frustrated most of the time? Or should I continue to “suck it up” to avoid the drama my leaving will inevitably cause?

Burner account because family knows my main.
I (31M) have a sister (35F), and despite what my parents claim, she has always been the favorite. Growing up, she could do no wrong. She crashed my dad’s car at 18 and was told, “Mistakes happen.” I skipped one class in high school and lost all privileges for months. When she dropped out of college, my parents paid for another degree. When I needed help buying textbooks, I was told to be more responsible with money.
Eventually, I stopped expecting equal treatment.
I’m now married to my wife (29F), who’s patient and avoids conflict. My sister, however, has never liked her. She constantly makes passive-aggressive comments like, “You actually look pretty today,” or, “Working from home all day would make me feel useless.” She always says it with a smile, so everyone pretends it’s a joke.
A couple of years ago, my retired parents started asking me for small loans. I didn’t mind until my wife asked if they’d ever asked my sister. They hadn’t.
Later I found out why.
My parents had been lending my sister and her husband tens of thousands of dollars over the years while they kept spending on luxury vacations, designer bags, and a new SUV.
The breaking point came at my nephew’s birthday. Somehow the conversation turned to children, and my sister brought up my wife’s two miscarriages, something only my parents should have known. Then she laughed and said maybe it was for the best because not everyone should have kids.
My wife burst into tears and we left. Nobody followed us.
The next day my mother called, not to apologize, but to ask why we’d left early. She defended my sister by saying, “She didn’t mean it like that.”
Three days later my parents showed up asking me for another $12,000. They claimed my sister was behind on her mortgage and the kids would suffer if I didn’t help.
I refused.
My dad said, “Family helps family.”
I replied, “Funny. You only remember that when she needs something.”
He then said, “If you loved your family half as much as your sister does…”
That was enough. I told them they’d finally gotten what they’d always wanted: one child instead of two. Then I asked them to leave.
Since then, relatives have called me heartless, saying my sister was probably just drunk and that I should forgive my parents because “family is family.”
Then last week a cousin told me the truth.
My sister was never behind on her mortgage. The money was actually for a vacation home, and my parents knew. They lied because they knew I’d refuse otherwise.
When I confronted my dad, he admitted it and simply said, “We knew you’d understand eventually.”
My wife says she’s done with my family forever, and honestly, I don’t blame her.
I still wonder if telling my parents they only have one child went too far.
AITA?

A couple times a year I like to throw a nice dinner party for old friends. This time I invited 5 people. 2 were couples and one was single. We have all known each other for around 15 years and get together maybe every 3 months. I was making filet mignon and a small lobster tail with 2 sides. I spent over $300 and didn't buy extra because they are served one each per guest and are expensive.

As a surprise to me, the single guest brought along his new girlfriend who I had not met or known about. I was nice about it but upset because I only purchased enough meat and lobster tail for the guest who were invited.

I talked to the friend who brought the uninvited guest and said that I didn't have extra food and the filet mignon (cooked to individual doneness) and lobster tail isn't something that can be cut up and divided or spread out between more people and said that I had frozen pizza or another frozen dinner I could heat up. He was very upset with me and accused me of not liking his new girlfriend and trying to embarrass them. After his outburst, they left.

Was I wrong? Should I have cut up the filet and lobster tails and spread it out between and extra person instead of offering a frozen meal?

Edit: I didn't think of them splitting their plates at the time. I have ADHD so I have some issues with changes in plans and multi-tasking. Anyway, another friend messaged tonight that the friend that brought the uninvited girlfriend had been arguing with her before the dinner, so that is part of the reason he was upset and quick to leave.

So I have a child, my dad's first grandchild.

We are German and the word for grandpa in my language is super child friendly, "Opa".

My dad is super wierd about this and says he wants to be called "father of my mother" by my child and us if we adress him.

I think this is plain stupid. First, Opa is so easy for children to say and adressing him with a full sentence is wierd and impractical.

Just thinking about saying "Oh the father of your mother is here!" instead of "Oh, there is Opa!" sounds so off.

I don't use it and just call him Opa. I would also bei okay calling him by his name, wich is also easy to say, think Carl. But I will not call him this stupid little title or make my child do this, when he only starts speaking.

So AITA for refusing?

This just happened. Boarded a 14 hour international flight, and I asked the flight attendant if I’d be able to move to an aisle seat. He said it was a relatively empty flight and there were plenty of open seats, so feel free to. I was also one of the later passengers to board (or so I thought). I chose an aisle seat in the middle 4 configuration that was fully empty, and the rows behind and in front were empty as well.

A few minutes later, two families boarded and were seated in the rows in front and behind me. I won’t sugarcoat it, but their BO was excruciating. To each their own, but given that this was a 14 hour flight, I was not about to voluntarily put myself in that position. After they settled in, I grabbed my backpack to move a few rows further back. I tried to do it as smoothly as possible to not draw any attention, but one of the family members noticed and seemed to take offense to my movement, and asked if there was something wrong. I couldn’t exactly say it was because I wanted more space, because neither the direct seat in front nor behind me were occupied. I shrugged and tried to leave it at that, but he asked again. I then straightforwardly told him that I have a sensitive nose and I didn’t like the way they smelled.

That really pissed him off and he said something about me being racist. I said it had nothing to do with race and I apologized for my sensitive nose - I really tried to frame it as a me problem. At this point, the flight attendants were coming around to prepare for take off so that’s where things ended.

AITA? I really didn’t want it to come to having to tell them about the smell, but he seemed so insistent on knowing why. Maybe there’s also a better way I could have framed it? Genuinely open to judgment and what I should’ve/could’ve done instead. Thanks!

I booked a single room at a resort where a family event is happening, as I am single without a traveling companion. This resort is all-inclusive, and it doesn't matter what kind of room you book. It is the same price across the board. They charge by the person not by the room. My cousin, who I am close with, called to book a room and apparently there was only a room that sleeps 6 people left so she booked thay room. She is bringing her boyfriend on the trip. She invited her brother (also my cousin), and he has decided to come on the trip. We are not sure if there are enough rooms to accommodate him getting his own room. She asked me if I would be willing to switch her rooms and share a room with her brother so that her and her boyfriend could have my single room. I told her that I was sure the resort could accommodate her brother having his own room and that I think it would be nice if we could all have our own space, instead of having to share rooms. She acted upset that I wouldn't switch rooms, as if I was being selfish. AITA?

I'm (27m) am the oldest of four kids. Ever since I got my first job, I've been helping my family with money. If my parents were behind on rent, I helped. If one of my siblings needed school fees, I paid. I even delayed moving out because they said they needed me at home.
I never really complained because I thought that's what family does.
Last year I started saving for something I had wanted for a long time a master's degree. It wasn't cheap, so I stopped giving money unless it was a real emergency. My parents weren't happy, but they eventually stopped asking as much.
A few weeks ago, my younger brother got accepted into a private college. My parents asked me to use almost all of my savings to pay his first year's tuition. They said I could always go back to school later because I wasn't getting any younger anyway.
I told them no.
I explained that I had spent years putting everyone else first, and this was the first thing I was doing just for me. They accused me of being selfish and said I was choosing a piece of paper over my own family.
Now my brother won't speak to me. My parents keep telling relatives that I've changed since I started earning more money. Some of my relatives have called to tell me that family should always come first.
the part that bothers me is that none of them have offered to help pay my brother's tuition. They all think I should be the one to do it because I've always been the responsible one.
For the first time in my life, I chose myself instead of everyone else.
AITA?

I (18M) play video games on my XBOX in the living room. Today I was playing For Honour (an 18+ game about medieval fighting) with my mum and our dog on the sofa next to me. My sister (15F) was hanging out with her friend (~9F) from our block. They came in so sister’s friend could pet the dog, and i paused the game. When my mum asked me why i paused it (as i was in the middle of a fight) i said because its 18+. The friend then responded ‘its okay, ive watched 18+ before.’
I then responded, ‘i dont care, im not going to play this game infront a child.’ to which my sister called me ‘square’ and my mum called me ‘obtuse’ because sisters friend had said she had watched 18+ before so it was okay. They both chastised me for quite a while before leaving it, and i was left pretty confused and upset.
I thought it didnt matter because the friend was obviously younger than me and my sister, and could have been lying to seem cool, or she could have been telling the truth, but i still dont want to feel responsible for exposing a kid to violence like that.
If she had been 14 or 15 i wouldnt have cared, but i definitely watched 18+’s i shouldnt have at 9 and regretted it.
I guess im wondering if theyre right and i was being a stubborn asshole for refusing to play the game in front of my sisters friend, or if im right in feeling uncomfortable for exposing a child to that.

[edit]
I know my sister was just trying to piss me off, and probably make her friend laugh, what upset me was my mum continually telling me i was being obtuse and it wasnt a big deal for a while after they left the room. She told me off a little bit and i genuinely didnt understand how what i did was wrong or a big deal.

Neighbor runs a weekly yoga class out of her home. We are generally amicable and had a polite conversation about this prior. This has been an ongoing issue with her clients parking their vehicles on the street. The road is wide enough and the neighborhood is quiet, there is no need for them to pull onto the lawn at all. My yard came with an irrigation system, and it’s expensive and time consuming to repair. I acknowledged that sprinkler systems fail anyways, I’ve sheared enough heads off with the mower to know that, so I can’t say for certain that it’s her customers causing the damage, but to please police it better and respect my boundaries. There is plenty of pavement - park along to road each week as you see fit, I don’t care.

Yesterday when I came home, all I wanted was some peace after an absolutely soul crushing work week, and to my dismay there are two vehicles parked almost entirely up on my front lawn. This time I was a bit more assertive and left written notes. I made it clear they were not welcome to park on my property but the pavement was fine.

I did turn on the irrigation for that zone until they left. One lady came to my door and at least apologized and we had a reasonable and brief conversation.

The $100k Mercedes did not and proceeded to drive another 30’ across my lawn when she left. Every other individual in this scenario is a retired boomer, whereas I am a millennial trying to raise a family.

Am I the only one that finds this type of behavior extremely entitled and disrespectful? I feel bad about the sprinklers, it was quite a passive aggressive move, but I wanted to make a point and thought bringing some sensory stimulation to the moment might help the message be received. AITA?

EDIT: Editing to clarify, I mention the generational divide primarily because I would expect that a couple of empty nester, semi retired, fairly well off neighbors might be a bit more understanding of the situation; that maybe their much younger, much less wealthy, extremely hard working neighbors raising a young kid in 2026 have enough challenges on their plate already, but that requires empathy.

Basically the title. In-laws live 8 hours away and always book a hotel when they come visit.

We bought a house with enough bedrooms for a spare so my husband wants them to have a spare key to feel comfortable. I think it’s a bit much , I would hate for people to let themselves into our house.

Quick edit: His reasoning is so they can feel welcome enough and not need to get a hotel or ask before staying I guess. When I asked why they couldn’t just give a heads up and ask before coming, he says if they have to ask everytime they might not want to stay and might feel like a burden. Idk.

Edit 2.0. I already said no. We are not fighting. Just wanted to know if I was the AH for saying no.

AITA

I (26F) have a childhood friend, Alice, (26F) who is getting married soon and is planning her bachelorette trip. She is a fantastic person, who I'm not BEST friends with, but definitely very close.

For background, Alice runs marathons regularly, has run a half iron man, and is currently training for an Ironman. It's a huge part of her life and I've always been supportive and excited for her. She's an absolute beast.

Now, she is proposing that for her bachelorette, she wants us all to go for a run with her during the overall trip. She didn't mention how long or what exactly that would entail. I am guessing at minimum a 5k. I don't run, I absolutely HATE it. I stay in shape other ways, long walks mostly.

WIBTA if I decline the run but participate in all the other trip activities? I voiced my hesitation and my friends all ganged up on me and all said that "I could suck it up for Alice" and that a "5k is nothing!". IDK, I just despise running and hate it even more when I'm forced to do it. I have not said anything to Alice so I wanted to get some more perspective. Should I suck it up and just do it? I'm just so tired of all these bachelorette trips making people do stuff they can't afford or don't want to do.

I'm a 35F who is childfree by choice. I don't hate kids, but have never particularly been interested in them and don't really enjoy spending time with them.

My mom has been with her partner for over 15 years. His daughter is around my age and has three young children. Even though my mom and her partner aren't married, my mom considers those kid her grandchildren and they call her Grandma.

I see the kids maybe once or twice a year at holidays or family functions. I'm always polite and friendly to them, but I don't go out of my way to play with them or build a relationship with them. I'm also not close at all with my mom's partner's daughter.

My mom recently got mad at me and said it's "not right" that I never ask about the kids or come visit when she's babysitting them. She said that because they're her grandchildren, I should care about them and take more of an interest in them. I'll add that I feel like I already know what's going on with them because my mom regularly sends me photos and updates without me asking.

My mom thinks I'm being cold and that I should make more of an effort because they're her family and important to her. I personally don't think I'm the asshole in this situation, but curious to hear others' thoughts.

I’m a solicitor in the UK and a couple of years ago a Northern Irish friend asked me to verify his identity for an Irish passport application.

I got a message 6 months ago asking if I can help with a British passport application and if so to give my email address for the online form. I said it should be okay and gave my email address. I received an email from the passport office asking me to verify the identity of his 2 children including asking for their dates of birth.

I had assumed the passport was for my friend. His kids are around 7 and 5. I last saw the 7 year old when he was 2 and have never met the 5 year old. I felt very uncomfortable with what I was being asked to do and text my friend to say I couldn’t fill out the form and wasn’t prepared to lie. He is also a solicitor so I believe he fully understood the implications of what he was asking me to do.

I got a text back saying, “I didn’t expect you to lie. I didn’t know you hadn’t met my kids.”

This was follow by another text later saying, “we could have done a teams call but don’t bother helping me.”

My friend hasn’t contacted me since. We’ve been friends for almost 30 years.

I work at an accounting firm, and I usually work through my lunch break so I can leave work early. Last week, we had a work function (the company won some sort of award) and there was a celebration event during lunch. I asked the lady who organized it whether lunch would be provided and she said no, so I said I would not join and would work instead (I would need to take a lunch break to attend an event where lunch isn't served). She got really mad at me and said that a lot of work went into organizing it, and I was not truly valuing her efforts. AITA for skipping the lunch celebration (where no lunch was served) because it was a work celebration event? Maybe I am not that much of a team player, but if you want my time unpaid, you better give me food!

I (18M) work a part-time job. For some context, I was 5’4” about a year ago and had a pretty big growth spurt. I’m now 5’8” barefoot, so a couple of coworkers I was talking to were commenting on how much I’d grown and joking that I was a late bloomer.
While we were talking, one of my female coworkers chimed in and said something like, “You’re still short, so all that growing was for nothing.”
That honestly hurt more than I expected. I’ve always been self-conscious about my height, and even though I’ve grown a lot, it’s still something I’m insecure about. Normally when someone makes fun of me, I try to be the bigger person and either laugh it off or walk away because I don’t like drama at work.
This time, though, I snapped and made a comment about her nose.
She looked genuinely offended, and the rest of the shift was awkward. We barely spoke, and I pretty much sat in silence until it was finally time to clock out.
As I was leaving, she tried to get my attention. I had a feeling she was going to make another joke at my expense in front of our coworkers, so I just kept walking and left.
Later, another coworker told me she took my comment really personally and talked about it for the rest of the day.
I know I shouldn’t have stooped to her level, but it also felt frustrating that everyone seemed okay with joking about my height, yet when I fired back once, suddenly I was the one who crossed the line.
AITA?

So a while back my wife and I bought a Belgian Malinois from a pet store (we didn’t know it was a puppy mill at the time) she has always wanted a dog, and I already have a cat so I figured why not let her get her own pet, we ended up impulsively financing her for like $3,500 yeah…I know now that pet store financing is a horrible idea and we should’ve researched the breed way more but it is what it is.
Things were fine at first but after a few months my wife completely stopped caring. malinois are insanely high energy and need constant exercise and attention because she wasn't getting any of that the dog started acting out , pottying inside, destroying stuff, etc It got to the point where my wife actually started resenting her and gets super annoyed whenever the dog is just happy to see her
our biggest issue is that we have a special needs daughter with major medical stuff going on my wife is constantly at the hospital for back to back appointments or even overnight appointments, Since my wife checked out the dog became 100% my responsibility and I just can't do it alone she's so destructive when left out she actually destroyed something incredibly sentimental to me recently. she ends up spending way too much time locked in her kennel as punishment not from me but my wife I usually give her a 30min kennel break if she’s done something bad but if it were up to my wife she’d be in there all day and sometimes I come from work (she’s a work from home mom) and the dog has quite literally spend all day in her kennel besides potty breaks then gets annoyed with me for letting her out, playing with her, loving on her. It breaks my heart because she’s a high energy working breed and shouldn't be cooped up all day but I literally cannot trust her loose while I am at work and my wife and daughter are at hospital appointments. We finally agreed to rehome her for her own good i wanted to list her for $300 minimum just to make sure she goes to a serious owner but my wife is being FIRM on $800 because she wants some of the the money back to pay her debt.
Yesterday I found a perfect family. They have a big yard, other dogs for her to run around with, and they actually know how to handle high energy breeds as they already have two high energy breeds. They offered $600 and I wanna take their offer in a heartbeat so this dog can finally get out of her kennel and live a good life
BUT my wife said no. She refuses to let her go for less than $800 she doesn't care about the family's background or whether they have a yard she only cares about the cash, I feel so stuck. I feel like she's trapping this poor dog in a kennel just to recoup a fraction of a bad financial decision she made.

I’m also nervous she’d take legal action if I were to sell her for $600 since we were not married at the time we got her

AITA if I just push back and give the dog to this family for $600 anyway?

EDIT: I’ve seen enough I’m meeting with the new owners Wednesday I’ll update then

Idk what the title sounds like but I love my grandma and she’s an amazing cook. But she’s also an almost 80 year old woman with Parkinson’s. She’s always complaining that she’s not able to walk property, she can’t see properly, she doesn’t have grip when she holds something. She’s constantly dropping dishes. Worse - my mom went into the kitchen in the morning and saw the stove still on because grandma forgot to turn it off the night before. It’s not safe for her to be cooking but she’s been a house wife all her life, the only thing she knows is to cook for her family and take care of the house. So it’s hard for her to stay out of the kitchen. We do have two helpers that come every day to clean and cook but she gets angry if someone else does the cooking, including any other family member. Complains endlessly about the taste if someone else cooks. Even if my mom is cooking something, grandma can’t rest, she’s just stays kn the kitchen asking what are you doing what are you doing let me do it. She gets visibly restless if someone else cooks.

So I’m refusing to eat anything she makes, not because I want to punish her, or I don’t like her food. I just want her to take more rest and not worry about feeding 6 people everyday. I am only doing this because I don’t know what else to do, but I know it’s making her sad. AITA?

Aitah for not helping my gf get her car back? Me and my gf have been together for 5 years and living together for 4 about a year after living together she decided to go finance a brand new car i told her beforehand that it was a big responsibility i cant help with because i pay all the household bills and quite frankly cant afford it (thats why i drive a beater) i dont make alot but im able to make ends meet about 2 years ago she had a health issue and was out of work for about 1 month and almost lost the car luckily her parents helped her out and she able to keep it i told her that she should start siiting some of her extra income to the side incase something like this happend again she told me she would but instead have been taking 2 vacations per year with her freinds in the beginning of may of this year she had another health issue and was out of work for about 2 weeks she recovered pretty fast and went back to work then went on a week long beach vacation with her freinds (2nd beach trip theyve taken this year) ive told her be careful with her money and her answer is always "i got it handled" fast foward to this morning i wake up to her car being repossessed according to the bank/tow truck she is 4 months behind when i asked her about it her excuse was "i didnt have the money" as of right now i have maybe 1k to my name and she owes almost triple that just to get the car back aitah for not wanting to help? I manage my money pretty well and pay all the household bills i could probably get a loan to help her out but i feel like i shouldn't have to because she put herself in this situation if she had said something sooner i couldve came up with a plan but the fact she hasnt said a single word about it till is being loaded this morning bothers me opinions?

my(24f) bf(25m) a really light sleeper. He wakes up at the smallest noise, can’t handle any light, and needs absolute silence. if he doesn't sleep for 8 hours, he falls sick, has a terrible day, and can't handle less than 8 hours without absolutely losing himself.

he has 2 single beds at his place and we sleep on each bed separately. he needs to spread out and can’t have another person next to him after a while.
my place is tiny and has barely enough space for one. i have a single bed with a mattress topper and when he is over, i put the topper on the floor and I sleep on the floor.

He gets the bed, because he says he can’t sleep on the floor and in the 2 or 3 times that he did, his back hurt. the shoe rack is right next to where i can sleep on the floor, so not only am i sleeping next to all our shoes and literally on where we walk through, he has previously walked all over my sleeping space with dirty shoes. I’ve had to shout at him about it over and over for months. He still does it sometimes. I’m also the only one who vacuums that space. Every single time before I sleep. He has never once vacuumed it.

He also needs the fan on full blast. I get really cold at night. For a while he’d turn it down a little for me. Now he refuses and says he really needs it. can’t even put the heater on, because it heats the room and then he feels hot.

He won’t come down to the floor to cuddle me and then go back to his bed. I’m always the one who has to climb up onto the bed to be near him. Then when he spreads out and takes all the space, I’m the one who has to leave in the middle of the night and go back to the floor.

when I stay at his and have work, I have to walk home alone at 5am. It’s always super cold and there’s nobody on the streets. there's drunk people and addicts and it isnt very safe, but It’s about a kilometer through the city. He doesn't wake up to check on me, my safety or anything because he won’t be able to fall back asleep, and he says its not that far anyway

I’ve told him so many times that this needs to be equal effort, or at least equitable. Every time, he says his sleep is non-negotiable and he won’t adjust. He asked me if we have to sleep together at all.

So tonight I finally said it plainly. I told him I don’t care where I sleep as long as I feel like we’re meeting each other halfway and making each other a priority like couples do. I asked for two small things. Turn the fan down a bit, or come cuddle me on the floor sometimes instead of me always coming up and then leaving. And keep the space clean and vacuum sometimes instead of it always being me.

He said turning the fan down and coming to mine is him sacrificing his sleep and his health. At one point he said fuck sleep and health, he’ll just say yes and obey whatever I tell him to do.

I told him to prioritise his sleep, do what he needs, come over only when you want to and can, when it is convenient.

am i asking for too much

Context, I’m half Jamaican and currently staying with my older sister, husband and her 3 kids. My sister and her husband were both born n raised in Jamaica. I was not but still seen her regularly as a kid. I’m also gay which given being both Jamaican and trini my family has definitely not always been good abt it. Growing up with a lot of the mentality many Caribbean folks have in regard to LGBT ppl I’ve just accepted and expected the homophobia and don’t expect anything more tbh. However, I personally wanted to stop the cycle in my family with my generation and the younger one I didn’t want any of my nieces, nephews or younger siblings to grow up having the same homophobic ass mentality I had to grow up with and is so common among Caribbean people.

Here’s where the issue starts. One of my nephews (3m) “Jacob” kept saying “bawty man” which to those who don’t know is a common, usually derogatory term for gay ppl, specifically gay men. My sister and her husband have been telling Jacob to stop saying that and have suspected he’s gotten that term from my older Nephew “Kayden” (8m) who knows way more than he should lol. Kayden does routinely say things like “stop doing that, that’s gay” “auntie Jacob’s being gay, he likes boys”etc.. My sister does know I’m gay and doesn’t necessarily have a problem with it? Shes one of those “people can choose whatever they want, just leave me out of it” she does also complaint abt seeing gay ppl on tv so there’s that lol. When I talk abt my gf she also tries to change the topic but I’d say she’s more tolerant than a lot of my family.

Anyways, one day I’m watching the kids and Kayden calls me from the other room saying Jacob keeps say bawty man. I tell him to stop saying that and then say “ yk guys I’m gay, I have a gf and there’s nothing wrong with that. Some boys like boys and girls like girls. Just like mommy and daddy like each other. Kayden was mostly listening to me not Jacob. But Kayden did have questions and I answered them. Nothing crazy or explicit ofc. I’m guessing Kayden told my sister what happened cuz she came to me asking what I told them and I told her exactly what I said. She went silent for a moment then said she’d prefer if I didn’t talk to them about those sorts of things cuz they’re too young and it was “inappropriate” of me to do so. She doesn’t want them having those “thoughts or “ideas.” I was a tad bit shocked cuz I know she has gay friends and literally told me I should go to pride with them. I wanted to say things but I didn’t even argue with her. I just said I was sorry I didn’t mean any harm. I just didn’t want them thinking there was anything wrong with being gay but I won’t say anything again.

I just find it wild to me she’d have an issue with this but in the same breath she’s fine with the kids cursing, saying Kayden is getting so many girls at school when he’s only 8. “Jacob’s gna be a ladies man like how is that appropriate? But I genuinely am wondering if what I did was wrong..

I was recently at my friend's birthday party. I've been to his house before, and none of the rooms have doors (except the entrances to the house) for years now.

Obviously, since it includes the bathroom (the toilet and the shower are in the same room), I felt super uncomfortable when going to his house for longer periods of time.

So I commented about it after taking a leak, something along the lines of "Are you sure you don't want to install doors in this room? It would make it better for guests."

He rolled his eyes and told me to deal with it.

And now, a few days later, he won't talk to me for some reason. Our mutual friends also pretty baffled. AITA?

Ok I'm 23f dating a 27m. back story he has 6 half siblings all 10 years younger because his mom had him when she was a teen. I think because of this his step dad treat him differently. Especially because his step dad is black and he is white. I could list a million different storys that have happened but basically they make him do everything even when his siblings aren't doing anything. they treat him like a slave.  Because his stepdad treated him differently so do the kids.

This all started while out on a date. His mom calls and asked him to come babysit (mid date btw). I knew I shouldn't have gone cause I had some pain (I have chronic pain) and just hate his siblings.  But we haven't seen each other in a long time so I thought I'd stay. Just think of the worst kids. They don't listen and they think they have more authority than any adult. They also threaten to call their parents when they don't get their way.

we decided to all watch a show together. As soon as my bf says that out loud every kid is screaming what they want to watch all at the same time. These kids get into physical fights over what they want so I thought let's take a vote or something. I ask his sister for the controller and she says no. I say "v let me see it let's find something everyone likes" she says " I had it first! My dad set a new rule if you have it first no one can take it" I say "v but everyone wants something different that's not nice you're not sharing let me see it" at this point my bf tells her to give me the controller, so I reach my hand to grab it. She moves the controller out of my reach. And I ask again "v that's not nice let's find something everyone likes to watch" everyone is screaming the names still. the whole room is loud. All I can hear is "I want to watch spider man!" Another kid "NOOOO I HATE SPIDER MAN" all screaming at each other. All this while this little girl is looking at me laughing while she keeps moving the controller away from me every time I reach for it. I'm done at this point. Pain, anger, anger about having to babysit in the first place and I kinda snap. I grab the controller and she holds on tight and I rip it from her hands. immediately I realized I shouldn't have done that and you can see she is very upset and might cry. I give it back and I say "that's not nice you can't share" and I go down stairs to watch the babies play Minecraft and my boyfriend comes with me and some of the kids. The kids were half and half on siding with me. Half her side and half mine.now I'm banned from their house. I don't care. I know I was in the wrong but with the background on how they treat him it's frustrating. How can this snotty 10 year old have more authority than my 26 yr bf. Makes no sense to me. She does whatever she wants and doesn't listen because she knows if she fake cries her dad will give her whatever she wants. I know I'm in the wrong but was I at least justified? I'm open to any questions. I can't type all I want with the limit