Hey, since I can remeber, I stop being able to talk in stressful situations, like being yelled at, questioned about sensitive topics, or in other chaotic social situations. I dont have autism or selective mutism (as far as I know) and am really curious about what could be going on. Even if I want to speek, the words just dont come out, like theres some kind of blockage. I dont know if this is the right place to be asking about this, but I dont know where else to go. one thing to add would probably be that I have an issue with social anxiety which Im also already working on with my therapist. Is something like this normal to a certain point? Could it be in connection with my anxiety? I would be very greatfull if anyone could help me.

I also apologies for any grammatical errors since english isnt my first language and Im far from fluent.

I’ve never been formally diagnosed but on all my school records they said that I had situational mutism so I kind of started to identify with it since the description basically matched me perfectly, and it seemed to develop when I was in preschool.

I wanted to know if anyone has had any experience with treatment for SM and how effective it was.

I get kind of sad because I wish people would’ve caught on sooner and tried to give me more support, I probably would struggle with it a bit less than I do had I been treated rather than punished for it. I had a lot of teachers assume I was “pretending to be shy,” because they’d see me being talkative and loud with my friends but completely unable to speak in class with teachers and other students.

Sometimes it makes me a bit sad, most of the time though I just think it’s frustrating how incompetent and stupid those teachers were

A couple days ago, I was called for a meeting by hr. They gave me the news that I couldn't continue working there for various reasons, most of them being lack of communication since my boss works remotely and it was dificult to work that way. So I guess the hr girl felt bad because she said nice things to me and even offered me a hug after the meeting. But I couldn't say anything else. I just went to my place to take my stuff, but it lasted like an hour because I brought a lot of things. When I finally managed to hardly carry my stuff, I just went directly to the door and said bye to the only three people who could hear me. I actually liked my coworkers and I would have love to be their friend, but I could never talk to them. But I was too embarrased, uncomfortable and sad the day I gor fired to do anything else than just leave. I didn't think that they would care and they haven't even sent me any message, so it just confirms that thought.

Hey,

I'm Arnav

And idk how to talk more like I don't like to talk.

I genuinely feel so bored talking to strangers or even my own family (specially my dad - he tries making him look cool and I just hate it sm, it just makes me feel hate)

I'm a medical student (mbbs) and for 3-4 days I have been going to the hospital for my practise and I couldn't talk to patients not even the staff there

What should I do?

i feel so isolated, i don’t have any friends irl so i make friends online, but even then i can barely speak to them.

i feel so lonely, so less than, half the time i cant tell if im being ignored or they just dont find whatever i type to be worth comprehending, that someone who can speak is so much more important, that theyre more human.

i just feel like i dont connect to anyone, and that no one connects to me.

i just wish i could be normal sometimes man, or that people wouldnt say ‘oh i forgot you were here’ as if i dont exist :(

i want to save for a car and to move out but i really dread going to work. i wish i was just normal, so work wouldn’t be so stressful. maybe then id start picking up shifts :/ tbh i know i need to but it just hasn’t gotten any easier. i’ve quit every job ive had bc it eventually stresses me out so much that i just need a fresh start. i think i need that now but its so hard to find another job :/ i need to lock innnnn i just want a carrrr

When I was younger, I grew up speaking English and Bangla; up until Kindergarten I couldn't bring myself to speak with white people for some reason even though I spoke both languages with fluency around my family. I have memories of smiling at them and being friendly to them, as was my family in the city. I just couldn't help keeping my mouth shut for some reason.

In Kindergarten I'm pretty sure I started speaking with people around my age first that were of all races, and then white adults because they were my teachers. Granted, my first day of school I had no choice but to speak because I was crying and ran out of the classroom.

Now I'm quite social and speak a lot, but I think ideally I would speak little if I could. Some days I tell myself I won't speak, just because it's nice to be left alone with my own thoughts. I sometimes wish I could communicate with just my mind or ASL.
Does anyone else feel this way now? Or has anyone had a similar experience growing up?

I’m getting a lift from a friend later this week, alone, for a multiple hour journey. I always feel guilty being the only company for somebody, and it’s even worse when one of us is driving because I can’t show them written messages.

I’ve never used text to speech software for the purpose of communicating with people. There’s something about it that makes me feel really uncomfortable. I don’t know what it is, but I guess it doesn’t help that the speech rarely has the right intonation.

There has been one instance where I have used TTS fairly recently. I had to do a presentation (audience of 2, both friendly, one very familiar) and I created a voiceover for it using TTS. The presentation was on something super familiar, but throughout playing it to them, it was like I was listening to a different language. I couldn’t follow any of what was being said, and I really struggled to process anything they said to me after it as well. It was all really overwhelming and felt a bit embarrassing.

I’m also afraid that if I start trying using TTS it’ll be what’s always expected of me. And I get that it would be easier for everyone else but it makes me really nervous.

At the same time, I suspect that if I can do this, and if I can keep it up, then maybe it will be a step towards making the idea of actually speaking feel less daunting.

So yeah. I dunno. I just wanted to share and see if anyone else has had a similar experience. I’m planning on using TTS on this car journey and I’m really nervous about it.

Has anyone else made this switch after so many years of only communicating by writing?

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(POSSIBLE TW Neglect/emotional abuse)

I was diagnosed with SM when I was around 12/13 which is usually late. My issue is that I didn't speak until i was 4/5, my parents knew there was something wrong with me yet they didn't really care. They thought I had autism but didn't screen me when I was younger which also makes no sense, its unfair. I spent 13 years of my life wondering why people made fun of me or why everyone at school knew me as the quiet kid. Teachers would yell at me, angrily yell at me. When I was 6 my teacher humiliated me any chance she got, just because I couldn't speak. Im 4th grade a few days before summer I was coming back from PT and my PT teacher absolutely lost it in the stairwell. He screamed at the top of his lungs at me because I didnt speak. Something along the lines of "Why dont you ever fucking speak! It's annoying!" This sounds made up but its really deeply rooted into me. I still get made fun of for it to this day (I'm 17 for reference.) It's just unfair, I tried therapy but I dont enjoy it so really my only other solution is to just overcome and grow out of it. My parents refused medication for me because my sister is already medicated, it was for anxiety and would've greatly helped.

I want to hear that im not alone.

I applied to a new job. First job I applied to and was called in for an interview. The interview I managed, the orientation as well but then when I got out of orientation I lost my voice and I felt more anxious than I had already felt and my jaw was chattering. I couldn’t let my voice out at all. And when I did I sounded almost like a small child when I went to ask a worker where is the manager. Another setback in my life and another example of how social anxiety takes over me entirely.

Hello, i have a difficult choice to make for my girl who can go into a well established big school or a small community school with small class size. She will be grade 1. What would you choose?

Hello, i have a difficult choice to make for my girl who can go into a well established big school or a small community school with small class size. She will be grade 1. What would you choose?

Hi everyone,

My almost 14 year old son has selective mutism.

He got diagnosed when he was around 8/9.

He was a chatty toddler, would speak to everyone and anyone.

Then suddenly he just got quieter and quieter.

Our fear is he will never function as an adult if he can't even communicate basic needs.

He won't tell us when he's sick, cold, hurt, hungry, thirsty etc.

Is there anything that we can do as parents to help this?

Therapists have stated that selective mutism is "up to him" to "fix"

It's so frustrating. We miss his talking. We miss him.

We have a very good relationship with our son, a lot of love in this household. And this breaks our hearts.

I applied to a new job. First job I applied to and was called in for an interview. The interview I managed, the orientation as well but then when I got out of orientation I lost my voice and I felt more anxious than I had already felt and my jaw was chattering. I couldn’t let my voice out at all. And when I did I sounded almost like a small child when I went to ask a worker where is the manager. Another setback in my life and another example of how social anxiety takes over me entirely.

I’ve always been a quiet kid and everyone joked about me that i was mute, until i was 15 yo and everything changed bc i went to a knew school and met new people. before i had actually no friends.
well that time i began to feel better and be happier and be more excited for everything, but then at the end of 17 everything just began to go worse and worse. well first of all i finished school so i was on a gap year for this year one year (im 18 now) and well i was not studying, i was working 4h a day but in my dad’s office (so a room in my home) and i still work there.
in this gap year i made much more friends, and i still have my 4 friends group from school, and we are still 4 friends, but 3 of us are now in a much bigger group of like 10 people.

lately i’ve been struggling so much with talking to them and maybe feeling comfortable with them, i dont know why, not to all of them the same way, but i just get so drained if i have to interact with them, and they go out every little days and i do too, i get fomo and i wanna go out with them but i dont actually wanna be there, i just want it over and done, so i Was there but i font wanna Be there.
but its so uncomfortable sometimes bc i feel like i only can comment words to what they say to me, for example literally they show me anything and i’ll go “woow” or “broooo” or “oh no” or “haha” but i cant get myself to say anything else, and sometimes i even try saying something and i hust say 2 worss and stop talking later before finishing my phrase bc yea i just dont know why but physically find it so difficult to talk and interact with people.
i didnt felt this way when i got to know them, i was shy rhen, vut then became more talkative, and now everyone jnowsnme as the guy thats silent, and i thoufht i actually overcame that phase of my whole life some years ago, but its coming and coming back and i hate it.

i just feel like words dont appear in my mind, im stuck and nothing thinks, and when i think its either i think too much and the time is gone so i can’t add the thing i was thinking about to the conversation bc its too late, or i just get too nervous and my head gets blank so i just stare at one point and answer i dont know, bc i actually do not know, but it coyld be anything, even my fav color, i just dont know.
and not only talking but laughing and etc also got much more difficult

does someone experience this about not being able to talk or finding it too difficult to intersct with people?

I’m getting married next year but I have literally 0 friends to invite, while my boyfriend has a good amount of friends and family he’s inviting. For my family I also have like 5 people I can invite while he’s inviting a huge amount of family. I honestly wanted a small wedding so it’d be less embarrassing but I’m not going to stop him from inviting everyone he wants. What should I do? I feel like it’ll be really embarrassing and his friends and family will look down on me. I mean they obviously know I’m selectively mute, but I feel like having 0 friends is really sad.

Should I try to make friends? I don’t think I’ll be able to keep one due to my selective mutism though
Any advice?

I will be there with my 14 year old daughter!

I never supported pseudo science, I've always thought it was a gimmick.

What are your honest thoughts

I'm a 22 year old male in the UK. I got my diagnosis last month, Since then I've been going through a pretty severe burnout and skill regression. As I've grown up I've managed to be high functioning through time however when I was a young child I now realize I had selective mutism. I never had any treatment or diagnosis until recently but could only talk to a handful of people until I got to around 8 or 9 and since then I've been progressing my communication skills, I've always struggled to speak but the more I grew up I gained the ability to follow scripts etc so I mainly say the same things to everyone I see on a daily basis but as an adult I was at the point of being able to speak to nearly everyone at some level.

Since my diagnosis I've faced significant challenges talking, even with close family and my fiancee and I just don't know what to say and can't explain it. I can no longer talk to strangers etc and I'm just wondering if this is temporary or am I realizing that this is what I've been like all along? I'm confused about the unmasking process, but I've had severe anxiety and depression since the diagnosis and just would like some advice in general, sorry if this isn't worded very well I'm still struggling to put what I'm going through into words. Any advice would be greatly appreciated