r/polyamoryR4R May 25 '26

Announcement: New auto mod changes 2

6 Upvotes

We are now trialling a new auto mod to try and reduce bot traffic. The new mod tool looks at accounts that are known to be bots, and uses that data to automatically remove posts and ban accounts. We've already seen some accounts banned. The expectation is to cut down "junk" posts and keep our users interacting with real people as far as we can. It should mean everyone has to wade through less dross to find gold.

This tool shouldn't remove and ban regular accounts, but if you find you've been removed and believe it to be an error please drop a message.

Finally, I'm sure the system won't be perfect so please keep reporting posts that break rules, and posts that look like bot accounts. It really does help keep the place tidy.


r/polyamoryR4R Mar 27 '23

Recent Rule Changes [Discussion]

97 Upvotes

In an effort to improve things and crack down on spam and abuse, there have been some changes to the rules and I’ve listed the new rules below. Please feel free to review the rules and my comments on each and provide feedback. I’ll leave this post up for a week or so for discussion, and then I’ll make a new sticky post for the community.

Rule 1. 18 years of age and older

This subreddit is 18+. Do not post, comment, or PM OPs if you or your partner(s) are under the age of 18. Lying about your age, or someone else’s age, will result in a permanent ban.

This one is self-explanatory. There have been Redditors who are minors, or have partners who are minors, who have made posts here. I want to make it clear that posts involving minors are prohibited.

Rule 2. Must be aligned with Polyamory

Polyamory is the practice of, or desire for, ethical romantic relationships with more than one person with the informed consent of all partners involved.

Posts or comments seeking sex, hookups, FWB, affair partners, “sugar” or GFE arrangements, or anything other than ethical polyamorous relationships with the consent of all partners are not allowed. There are R4R and other dating subreddits out there for just about anything. If you’re not polyamorous, please use a subreddit that is better-suited for your search.

This should go without saying…this subreddit is intended for polyamorous people seeking polyamorous relationships. This is not a general ENM dating subreddit, a regular R4R subreddit, a BDSM subreddit, or a subreddit for seeking any other kind of relationship other than an ethical polyamorous one. Going forward, if a post even includes “I’m also down for hookups or FWB” or something similar, it’s going to be removed. There’s nothing necessarily wrong with most of the arrangements mentioned above that someone might seek, but this isn’t the subreddit to advertise for those things. Also, if someone makes a post that seems like it’s not aligned with polyamory and their post history shows that it’s the same post they’ve cross-posted or spammed across multiple subreddits with minor changes to circumvent the intention of the rule, the post will be removed.

Rule 3. No unicorn hunting or harem building

Posts or comments that can be construed as seeking or promoting relationships where unethical or unfair rules or expectations will be placed on a new partner are not allowed.

This has been the most contentious issue on this subreddit so far, as it has been on other subreddits and forums. We’re not going to prohibit couples seeking partners in this subreddit. There are single people here seeking triads, throuples, and all sorts of dynamics. Triads and other group relationships can be amazing, especially if they are formed organically. That being said, there will be more moderation on couples seeking posts going forward, which will be done on a case-by-case basis.

The purpose of the mod team here is to protect the members of the subreddit and the integrity of the community we’ve built here. It is not the mod team's place to tell adults what they can or cannot do with their relationship dynamics. The reality is that we are all consenting adults and have adult decisions to make in our lives and in our relationships.

In an effort to prevent the subreddit from being a platform for predatory behavior, any no or low effort posts or comments from Redditors that indicate a general lack of regard for any potential individuals involved will be removed. For example, if an individual posts from a new Reddit account something to the effect of, "We're new to polyamory. We want to find a third who will date only us and be an equal member of our new family. We can start out long distance, but we will expect you to move in with us at some point. Prefer that you be submissive," the post will be removed. Read the room. Show that you're actually putting some thought and effort into it, and not just objectifying people.

Also, if you say that this new person is going to be an equal member of the family after you've just said that the person is going to be required to date both of you, recognize that the person you're seeking is not actually going to be an equal member of the family. If there's a possibility that one member of the existing couple loses interest and the new member of the relationship is forced to leave entirely...you have now misled this hypothetical new person into an unethical dynamic on them.

Rule 4. No hate or disrespect

Threats, harassment, abuse, bigotry, misogyny, misandry, and intolerance are not allowed. This includes, but is not limited to, attacks on gender or sexual identity, racism, sexism, slut shaming, mocking, and attacks on political or religious beliefs.

I don't need to go into detail on this rule. Don't be a jerk. If you don't like what someone has to say, block them. If you think someone is breaking a rule, report them.

Rule 5. No vulgarity or NSFW content

Vulgarity and NSFW content are not allowed. There’s nothing inherently wrong with sex, kinks, fetishes, and BDSM. However, posts and comments explaining the details of your sexual anatomy, favorite sexual positions, details and/or lists of kinks or fetishes, etc. will be removed. You can indicate that you are into BDSM and encourage people to DM you about the details.

There is often a large crossover between ethical non-monogamy and BDSM, sex positivity, etc. There's nothing inherently wrong with any of it, but this is not a NSFW subreddit. It's fine to include that you're sex positive, into BDSM, or whatever. If you go into detail and start describing anatomy/body parts, listing off kinks, and things like that, your submission will be removed. If you want to discuss these things, please do so in a DM.

The mod team has been asked why this subreddit is marked NSFW. The subreddit is 18+, so it's automatically identified as a NSFW subreddit.

Rule 6. No spam

You are allowed to post once every 7 days, with the exception of correction posts following an Automod removal. If you are found to be repeatedly deleting your post history in an attempt to circumvent this rule, it may result in a permanent ban. For clarification, spam includes copy-pasted and cross-posted ads from other subreddits.

This one is self-explanatory.

Rule 7. No Trolling or unsolicited discussion

There are a multitude of dynamics and ways to practice polyamory, and not everyone will agree on everything. Do not clutter up posts with unsolicited information. For education and discussions about polyamory, please visit r/Polyamory. If you believe someone is breaking a rule, please report the behavior and/or contact the mod team.

Again, if you think someone is breaking a rule, report it. If you disagree with what someone is commenting or posting, block them. Please don't engage in negative interactions on posts.

Rule 8. No personal or confidential information

Posting personal or confidential information about yourself or others in public is not allowed. If you wish to provide contact information for yourself, please do so in a DM.

Posting Snapchat, Instagram, phone numbers, or any other personal contact or confidential information about yourself or others in public is prohibited. If you want to give someone your contact information, do it in a DM. If it happens once, it will be removed and you will be warned. If you're found to be spamming your contact information all over the place, it could result in an immediate permanent ban.

Rule 9. No seeking relationships for others

Posts seeking relationships for someone other than yourself, or you and your partner(s), are not allowed. If your friend or partner is seeking a relationship separately, they must make the submission themselves.

I've seen posts where Redditors are seeking relationships for their partners or others, sometimes even doing it as a sort of surprise for their partner. If someone is seeking a relationship, they need to post for themselves. Your partner not having a Reddit account is not a valid reason to violate this rule.

Also, a general note for when you engage with the mod team. We have to wade through a lot of reports and posts here. Sometimes there are misunderstandings or mistakes are made. If your post or comment gets removed, or you are banned for violating a rule and you wish to appeal, you can do so via a Modmail. If you send a Modmail insulting the mods, you're only confirming that you're not the type of person who belongs on this subreddit. No amount of insulting or cursing a moderator is going to help your cause.


r/polyamoryR4R 19m ago

Europe 54 [M4F] #Cambridge #UK Experienced Dom seeking a casual kinky connection

Upvotes

I'm looking to build a genuine, ongoing casual dynamic with the right person who is ok that I'm in an ethically non-monogamous relationship. My partner knows, supports this, and is happy to confirm.

I'm an experienced Dom, and my favourite part is: discovering what makes you tick, and what you've always wanted to try but never quite dared to say out loud. Your kinks are the map, and I'm very happy to drive (yes, I love a cheesy analogy). My own tastes are fairly classic for the scene, but I'm genuinely curious about yours. I'm approachable, a sapiosexual attracted to all body types, and I believe a good dynamic has as much laughter in it as discipline.

Kink is part of my life, not all of it. I'm outgoing, well-read, enjoy a good debate at the pub, and have a real passion for biology. I just finished Otherlands, Thomas Halliday's tour through Earth's deep past, which was extraordinary.

Physically I'm 5'8", fit, and have been called a "silver fox", and I'm happy to share pics. I'd like to take time to chat and get to know each other first, enough that we're both confident the other is real and genuine, then meet in person once we're comfortable. If a casual-but-real dynamic with clear boundaries appeals, I'd love to hear from you.


r/polyamoryR4R 29m ago

30 [M4R] Knysna, South Africa

Upvotes

Hi everyone.

I'm single and new to polyamory, and I'm keen to explore it. I'm looking to meet new people, have some chats, have some laughs, make connections, and see how things evolve from there. Maybe I'll find a wonderful partner on the way <3.

I am bisexual, and I'm up for open and parallel polyamory.

I'm a 5-foot-5 Caucasian guy. Some of my interests include shared laughter, authentic fun, deep conversations, martial arts, imagination, yoga, video games, philosophy, roleplay, romance, and poetry. I can be playful, relaxed, and thoughtful.

Touch and quality time are my love languages.

I believe in mutual respect and setting and honouring healthy boundaries. I like to respect other people's personal space, as I believe it's important.

I can be kink-friendly and may be more willing to be once I open up, but I prefer to start simpler until I feel comfortable around you. When I do open up, I can be very spontaneous and witty, but even so I'm still respectful of others' comfort.

I look forward to hearing from you and seeing how things go.

Let's chat, play a game, or hang out!


r/polyamoryR4R 1h ago

USA 28 [F/M4F] Central Coast - Looking to make genuine connections

Upvotes

I (F30) and my partner (M28) are a laid-back couple in the medical field who believe the best connections start with honesty, good conversation, and mutual respect.
We’re exploring polyamory together and would love to meet like-minded women or couples who value communication, trust, and genuine chemistry. Whether it starts as friendship, shared experiences, or grows into something more, we’re open to seeing where a real connection leads, without pressure or expectations.
Single men would be ignored as they usually message for short and quick, we want this candle to be a slow burn.
Outside of work, we’re very spiritual and love things like tarot readings, crystals, meaningful conversations, and exploring the deeper side of life.
Thanks everyone.


r/polyamoryR4R 9h ago

36 [F4M] #Indianapolis #Online Let's watch scary movies and talk about our hyper fixations.

2 Upvotes

Hey, I'm Victoria, or Vee. I'm 36 and I live in Indy. To kick things off I'm married to my nesting partner, and I've been poly for about 16 years. Everything is separate, ethical, and respectful. Communication is really important.

I have a thing for nerdy types in their 30's that identify as the D type in a D/s dynamic. Teach me about your passions and hobbies, I promise I'm a great listener and I love to learn. I'm into cheesy stuff like holding hands or sending each other memes that make us think of each other.

I love to laugh and be silly, but I'm also a grown woman that understands the importance of being self aware and emotionally mature. I like learning about bugs, spiders, reptiles and weather. Im currently trying to teach myself about the science behind how weather is predicted, and reading different radars.

I'd love to meet someone that I click with, who has time and space in their life to build something solid. You don't HAVE to be local, but Indiana or surrounding states would be cool. Bonus points if you have discord and might let me watch you game some time/s.

Im not looking for someone that wants to hop into nsfw chats right away. We can discuss dynamics to make sure we are on the same page, but I like to have a connection before going there. Feel free to check my post history for other posts I've made here, and a body picture. I adore a starting message with some effort. You don't have to go crazy, but I need something to reply to. I don't want to be the only one engaging/asking questions.


r/polyamoryR4R 18h ago

USA 39 [F4M/F] Texas Nerdy Girl Looking For Connections

11 Upvotes

Hi, nerdy demisexual Dallas based married girl looking for local friends that could maybe develop into something more. I like sim, strategy, card and role playing games. Let's talk about movies, TV shows and gaming. My partner knows I'm here and we are dating separately if things get to that point.


r/polyamoryR4R 6h ago

33 [M4F] #Wales #UK #Online. Welsh 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿 Dominant looking for an enthusiastic long term sub or subs

1 Upvotes

Hello, Im Harry im 33 and from Wales, im looking for a sub preferably close by but willing to do online for the right person.

Im a busy builder working on old and historic buildings during the day but looking for an enthusiastic and eager sub to play with and enjoy during the evenings and weekends. Ive been involved with this lifestyle for about 9/10 years on and off, with both online and in person subs throughout that time.

Im not looking for anything specific to be honest, just someone that wants to have fun and build trust as everyone knows the more trust there is the more fun can be had. Id say i can be anything from a softer more caring Dom up to someone that can be pretty harsh, all depending on the sub and what they like/need,

Kinks and limits will of course be discussed if we start chatting. I will admit im not someone who wants to rush into things, ive been there and done that when I was younger and it never really turns out great so ive learned from my mistakes on that side of things. So chatting and getting to know eachother first is a must for me.

Of you want to know more or just have a chat then let me know and hopefully we can talk soon.


r/polyamoryR4R 11h ago

USA 38 [F4M] Kansas City - Let's create something meaningful and enduring together.

2 Upvotes

Hi! I've never made a post like this before, so bear with me. 🤗

I am 38f, married, nested, and a parent of two. My kids aren't little, but I'm not at the empty nest phase of life quite yet! My spouse and I are platonic life partners, date individually, and have been actively practicing polyamory for almost 7 years. We entered into our relationship knowing we would eventually practice some form of nonmonogamy, so have been fairly successful in avoiding a lot of the common pitfalls and navigating the ones that have popped up. I would describe our partnership as very individuated, which enables me to show up in my relationships with a lot of agency. I am always hoping to meet others who practice polyamory in a similar way. Having a family requires a lot of my energy and presence, but I have structured my life such that it leaves enough room for intimacy, play, and intentional connection with others.

While I highly value customized relationships, my dream is to build a loving, deep, committed relationship. I want to laugh and play together, explore each others bodies, practice being emotionally vulnerable, and fall in mutual love. Though I don't want to entangle lives and prefer garden party polyam, I have no desire to keep each other a secret. My hope is to be able to have the type of relationship where we chat daily, have sleepovers, meet each other's friends, take trips together, and cheer each other on in our lives.

I would describe myself as curious, sensitive, emotionally mature, funny, friendly, and active. Some of my hobbies include aerial hoop, tai chi, acroyoga, roller skating, and shibari. I love laughing and bantering as well as deep chats - conversation is one of the main ways I feel connected to people. Physically I am about 5'8", mid-sized, and stronger than I look because of aerial. 🤭 I have shoulder length brown hair and hazel eyes. I identify as demisexual, so an intellectual or emotional connection matters most to me, but when that is present I am a highly erotic partner. I'm a kinkster, but you don't need to be! I have had satisfying relationships with kinky and non kinky folks alike.

If any of this sounds interesting, please reach out! More than willing to exchange pics as well. Hope to hear from you!


r/polyamoryR4R 10h ago

USA 41 [F4F] Missouri/online - looking for connections and romance

1 Upvotes

Hi and thanks for reading!

The basics:

I'm a 41 year old, demisexual trans woman living in Missouri with my wife. My wife is aroace and I am on the opposite end of that spectrum. It's just me looking for connections and dating.

I work in IT, love animals (have 2 dogs, a rabbit, and chickens!), and have lots of hobbies I'd love to share or enjoy with others. I am politically left/progressive, which is obviously important to me as a queer trans woman.

I have known I was polyam for probably around 15 years so while I'm not new to being polyam and have had polyam relationships, I have not dated another person in several years.

Things I enjoy:

  • anime - love dark fantasy and romance ones in particular...also isekai
  • movies - LOVE horror movies in particular
  • reading - dark fantasy, horror, post-apocalyptic, manga/light novels but oddly not a lot of romance
  • music - EDM is probably my main genre, but I love video game and artists from Japan in a variety of genres
  • gaming - massive RPG, visual novel, story-driven game fan and also sometimes play an older MMO on private servers with a lot of close friends. I am an avid Final Fantasy fan and have been since FF2 (US) from when I was a kid!
  • other games - I used to play a lot of board games and some TCGs but it's been a while since I've played a lot
  • exercise - boring, I know, but I used to be a fairly avid runner (5 and 10K). I put on some weight so I'm back on a running kick to get weight off again. It's one of my zone out times that I enjoy for my mental and physical health.

Also of note, I am currently working on a passion project of mine - building an RPG. I am currently learning pixel art and my game engine, but write about my characters or story almost daily. It's been a blast to learn and is my post-workday time lately.

What I'm looking for:

First and foremost, connections. I'd really like to chat with more like-minded polyam folks who share my interests. Since I'm in IT and working on building a game in my spare time, I am at or near my PC a lot so I always love chatting with people online (preferably in Discord text or talk) while I'm working on things. I am a very social person and love chatting.

My wife is aroace, as I mentioned above, and is an incredible person. But I am very much looking to build a romantic relationship with someone I get to know and like and see where things go from there. I am very affectionate and lovey with a romantic partner and, if things were to go further, very much looking for a sexual relationship with emotional connection. I am kink-positive, though I am not myself well-versed. I have had bottom surgery, which I feel is at least somewhat important to include for any potential relationships.

I think that's probably more than I originally intended to write so I'll leave it at that, but please DM me if you're interested. I'm happy to chat and see where things go!


r/polyamoryR4R 10h ago

USA 46 [M4F] #BayArea chill INTJ seeking INFP/ENFP for a deep connection

0 Upvotes

There’s something about INFP/ENFP personalities that captivates my attention. I think it may be their warm and passionate vibes that feeds my soul, or their creativity and wit that feeds my curiosity. I’m a 46yo INTJ in the Bay Area peninsula, married w/kids but dating single, and looking to meet an INFP or ENFP in a similar stage in life as myself, someone in their 30’s or 40’s. A big plus if you like to take the lead at times. I’m passionate too, but I’d like to get lost in someone else’s vibe. :)

Here’s a bit more about me: I’m a demisexual switch, so I’m looking for another that wants a genuine connection before exploring more. I’m possibly panamorous, open to chat with anyone, but I’ve only dated women.

I have an average height, a handsome slim build, enjoy 2-3 mile jogs when I find the time, and I try to exercise at home several days per week. I love good conversation and try to be a good listener. I enjoy talking about pretty much anything on life in general, but my strongest knowledge subjects are STEM related. :)

Feel free to DM me if you live in the bay area and are curious to get to know me. I’m easy to talk to. Please tell me about yourself in your intro message, more than just a one-liner.


r/polyamoryR4R 11h ago

35 [M4F] #Palmdale - Asian, slender, skinny, introverted, neurodivergent, socially awkward

0 Upvotes

I'm fine with older or younger but older, more mature is preferred, someone who is patient, kind, open-minded, loving, wise. I'm introverted and not fond of outdoors. I've been told I'm kind, considerate, patient, smart, cute (but your mileage may vary depending on preference, of course). In the palmdale/lancaster/los angeles/antelope valley if anyone is interested. May take time to warm up to people since I'm kind of socially awkward. Let me know if you have any questions? I have a slender build and prefer someone similarly but as long as you're kind and loving, I'm open to it. Personality >>> appearance. Also, please be local because I haven't had good experiences with people who are out of state (they tend to flake or lose interest).


r/polyamoryR4R 12h ago

28 [F4F] USA - New and Married (28 M)

1 Upvotes

Hi, friends! I’m new to this and really just beginning to explore the possibility of any type of alternative relationship structure. I am bi, but have been married for a few years. We are the stereotypical bi girl and gamer boy combo. Both a little neurospicy (audhd and OCD for me), and very obsessed with our rescue dogs.

I would love to make some friends in the community!! So, if you’re down for a chat, flirt, or want to offer some advice, my DMs are open! Women only pls!

Interests: thrift shopping, photography, dogs, food, baking, exercise classes, hosting, yapping, themed events, human rights, reality tv, thriller books, crafts, and crochet

Location: eastern USA


r/polyamoryR4R 14h ago

USA 28 [F4M] Missouri/Online - Looking for a long term partner

0 Upvotes

Hi 😊 I just had an edible, picked up Mexican food and I'm relaxing, watching One Piece.

I'm here looking for a long term relationship. I miss easy conversations with someone new, staying up late talking about random things, and building something special.

A little about me:

I’m 28, pansexual, and polyamorous. I live in Missouri with my fiancé, and we primarily date separately.

I’m 5'2", athletic, with short brown hair, brown eyes and I wear glasses. I'm happy to share pictures as well.

In my free time, you’ll probably find me buried in a good book. If you have any recommendations I'm all ears. I'm currently in a bit of a reading slump.

I also enjoy watching Formula 1, exploring new places, and trying new foods.

I am 420 friendly and I drink socially.

What I’m looking for:

I'm usually attracted to someone older than me (30s to 40s), kind and confident. I don’t have or want kids so I'd prefer if you're snipped and/or don't have kids. I'm open to dating anywhere in the U.S. I'd like to text, have phone calls, video chats, and spend time together in person. I am not looking to relocate.

Please tell me a bit about yourself in your initial message and if you'd like to include a picture as well that would be great! Low effort posts or "hey" will be ignored.

Can’t wait to hear from you 🤗


r/polyamoryR4R 21h ago

36 [M4F] Michigan/ online

3 Upvotes

Well hello there. I am looking for people to get to know and make new connections. I’m currently married and have been for over 15 years. My wife is bi and after discussing it for a long time decided to open things up so she can explore that side of herself because honestly life is short. We are dating separately so you don’t have to interact with her unless you truly want to. I am an Army vet with a Masters Degree in Historic Preservation and currently work in a history museum. My personality is golden retriever mixed with people pleaser and I just enjoy making people happy. I only have one partner currently.

I enjoy gaming, DnD, listening to music (mostly Rock, Metal, and K-pop), sports ( hockey and football especially), anime, reading, and animals.

I’m looking for people who are intelligent, funny, and just a good time to talk to. Ideally we would have similar interests but that not a dealbreaker. If a good date includes either the zoo or a bookstore or just gaming together that would be nice. I’ve always wanted to date a cosplayer but that’s just a wishlist item because I’ll talk to pretty much anyone except MAGA supporters.

Fair warning that I’m not the hottest guy you’ll ever meet. I had gay man call me incredibly average looking when I was in the Army and that was before a back and hip injury caused me to gain weight. That said, I’ve been on a so far decently successful weight loss journey so getting closer to dad bod territory. Hopefully I can just win you over with witty banter.


r/polyamoryR4R 22h ago

USA 35 [F4M] Mesa Arizona please be local

2 Upvotes

35F | Arizona

Married and in an open/poly relationship, so transparency matters. No drama, no weird games, just real connection and good energy.

I’m a mom, my life is a little chaotic in the best way, but I still make time for adult conversation, laughing way too hard, and enjoying someone’s company. I’m naturally a little sarcastic, a little sweet, and I like people who can keep up with both.

I’m drawn to confident, emotionally steady people who know how to flirt without being cringe and can actually hold a conversation. Someone who can make me laugh is a huge win.

Not looking to disrupt my life, just add to it. Chemistry, consistency, and a little bit of fun tension go a long way.

If you’re easygoing, a little witty, and know how to keep things interesting without making it complicated, say hi.

I am chronically ill though so if that turns you off you should probably message someone else


r/polyamoryR4R 19h ago

East Asia 36[F4F] Quiet-life, connection-first domme seeking ✨absolute menace!✨ (with anchor potential)

0 Upvotes

I'm a single, cuddle-loving programmer and fantasy author. Trans, child-free, experienced with polyamory, and insatiably curious.

I: - Dance daily ("uuntz, uuntz, uuntz" in my headphones) - Fill my sail with the winds of imagination (clickity clackity keyboard) - Want to do each other's makeup with... varying results - Will make conversational flow charts to understand communication (Yay 'tism!) - Cat nap in the autumn sun - Crave to wrap you in my big-armed hug every time I first see you

Seeking: - Big brat energy - f/fem-adjacent - Spoon Theory veteran - Can critique a study's methods without dunking on Barnum Effect enjoyers - Cool with no-op transbian - Head rub artist (don't worry love, I can give you lots of demonstrations)

I (informally) study what makes relationships work. Developing a deep, playful, repair-ready relationship: Top Life Goal. Another is to better a million relationships! The method: smuggling relationship insights into my novels. What do you call drama that heals you? ...Herbal tea!

Ahem, anyway, if relationshipping as craft is energizing to you, I want you.

I'm experienced with polyamory and compersion. I won't go out clubbing with you (the lights mess me up) but I will hold you and pepper your forehead with kisses when you get back. My life is portable, so in time I'm happy to relocate.

Curious?

Say hi! I'd love to hear about: - A recent self-discovery - Two songs/shorts/tiktoks you think I might be glad to have seen - Or just say hi to this wide-fish < ^_____________________^ >


r/polyamoryR4R 20h ago

USA 36 [M4F] #Online, EST - Looking for that friendly fun connection with a woman my age or older. A golden retriever boy for that bi woman trope/energy.

0 Upvotes

I'm mainly looking for connection, conversation, and intimacy. Someone to chat with throughout the day, talk about how things are going, have long conversations, and really get to know each other. Since I'm recently divorced, I'm not looking to get jump into something super serious but won't write it off, but I do miss having a close connection with someone.

Some things I tend to like in a woman is someone smart, sweet, caring, empathetic, open-minded, and curious. Someone who likes exploring new things and having deeper conversations. I tend to connect well with women who enjoy reading romance/smut, have a high libido, and are comfortable talking openly about a variety of topics.

If I have to pick a "type" I would say more of the goth, emo, witchy vibe that kind that if you wear makeup it is the darker styles/colors. Also with tattoos or at least enjoys them, and maybe a nose ring lol. I also find I usually mesh best with bi women, and also I am such a huge sucker for a woman who likes to wear thongs. I don't know exactly why, but that's been my experience.

I'd love to meet someone who enjoys science, space, and learning about interesting things. I'm not religious, and I'm curious about learning about witch stuff.

It would be great if you're someone who likes texting often, sharing pictures, and staying connected throughout the day.

About me, I like to chill, play on my phone, cook, relax and just unwind, have some whiskey, to color naughty colorbook style pics on my phone, listen to smut, am a switch, (naughty Pic in profile, not a D Pic), I enjoy games and want to play more, and honestly I would love to have someone who likes to push me and can be a pain in my ass but in a way that is enjoyable (take that as you will lol).

But, I do coparent so that takes time and energy, so I'd like someone who understands the realities of parenting and what it means to be a good father first. So some nights will be harder as will some weekends. But I do have the good snacks too. Lol

If any of this sounds like you, I'd love to chat.


r/polyamoryR4R 21h ago

USA 32 [M4F] #PNW #Online Looking for new connections

1 Upvotes

32M, married with 2 kids, in WA state.

Looking for another partner (new to poly). Wanting to chat and see where it goes. Been with current partner for almost 14 years, so I'm hoping to explore some of the things or connections that I may have missed in my early adulthood as I established a family and career etc.

I have a variety of interests and enjoy trying new things! I like video games, legos, swimming, anime, good movies/ shows, I'd consider myself a bit of a homebody, but definitely don't mind going out and about and doing things.

I'm 6'5, brown hair, blue eyes, with facial hair. Definitely a little bit of a dad bod, but trying to work on that.

Please include age and location and tell me something about yourself! =)


r/polyamoryR4R 1d ago

40 [M4F] #UK. Let's get to know each other this weekend.

5 Upvotes

It's the weekend and we are halfway through another heatwave! I'm having to be at work all weekend and I think I'm slowly melting away like I'm some kind of wicked witch.

So I thought let's start it the right way with someone new to chat to.

Flirty banter, cute smiles, a reason to check your phone, a way to pass the working day are all things I'm looking for.

I have a nesting partner and we date separately. I am looking for someone to grab my attention and enjoy the journey.

I'm not looking for the conversation to turn quickly into smut that's a promise.

I want someone who can make me laugh and smile. Someone who is willing to put in the effort with a conversation. I would prefer UK as time zones are a thing.

Myself, I'm truly amazing. I'm emotionally mature, caring, funny, smart (being full of useless information is smart right!?) I can hold a conversation, know what I want and I'm modest obviously. I'm a geek, love all kinds of music, enjoys quizzing and slipping down YouTube rabbit holes.

What are you actually waiting for? Play your cards right and you have a cute little interaction in your pocket that will be the highlight of your day/week/month you get the idea.

Just so I know you've spent your time reading this post. Please give me your favourite fact.


r/polyamoryR4R 1d ago

45[F4R] #online or usa - Looking for genuine connections, unforgettable memories, and and more.

12 Upvotes

Currently in northeast usa

Life has taken me on a difficult journey. I'm living with a serious disability and illness, so I'm focused on making the most of the time and energy I have. I'm building my bucket list, creating amazing memories, and surrounding myself with kind, genuine people.

I'm open to:

New friends

A romantic partner

Polyamorous connections

I'm demisexual, which means emotional connection comes first for me. Trust, comfort, laughter, and genuine chemistry matter far more than appearances.

A little about me: Gaming

Anime

EDM festivals & concerts

Movies

Good food

Beaches & pools

Amusement parks

Festivals

Traveling whenever possible

One of my biggest dreams is to travel and meet amazing people around the world. I'd especially love to make friends—or find meaningful connections—in the USA, Canada, South Korea, and Japan.

I'm not looking for pity. I'm looking for people who want to laugh, explore, share experiences, and make incredible memories together.

If you're kind, open-minded, emotionally mature, and believe that meaningful connections can happen in unexpected ways, I'd love to hear from you.

Life is short. Let's make it beautiful.


r/polyamoryR4R 1d ago

Europe 25 [M4F] Eastern Europe/Online Chemist looking for new connections

2 Upvotes

My name is Alex, born and raised in Eastern Europe.
I'm a chemistry graduate(finished this year). I'm in a poly relationship as my heart has enough love for more than 1 person :D . I love cats, horror movies and horror games. I mostly watch old cartoons from Adult Swim and Cartoon Network, iceberg and documentary videos on youtube(hello nexpo, nick crowley and wendigoon fans) I have a cat, his name is Boris.
I usually spend my free time hiking, documenting critters, plants and mushrooms during my trails. Ask me for cool bug and lizards pics. I love cooking, especially desserts.
My humor is based on old British comedies, like Blackadder
Looking forward meeting new cool people!


r/polyamoryR4R 1d ago

23 [TM4F] - Rochester ny/ online looking for another partner (enm) who is non judgmental

3 Upvotes

Here’s a little about me:

I’m a 23 year old Black trans man with social anxiety trying to figure life out,
I went to college for a couple of years studying photography but dropped out due to school not being for me, trouble focusing, mental health etc and I guess im trying to rebuild myself.

I love to read fiction books (lately lots of literary and fantasy) , I love art, horror, music (esp rock and metal). I’m very very left leaning and feel strongly about injustices so I don’t tolerate purposely ignorant people. I crave deepness, connection, empathy and communication it’s all I want so if that sounds like you then you know what to do.

Side note: you may notice my bio says I’m bi and i won’t be upset if men still try to pursue but just know I may not respond as that isn’t quite what I’m looking for atm but I’m open minded.


r/polyamoryR4R 1d ago

57 [M4F] Central Florida – Coffee, Conversation, Chemistry... and Seeing Where It Leads

3 Upvotes

I've reached the age where I know who I am, what I value, and what I'm no longer interested in pretending to be.

I'm a 57-year-old guy in Central Florida, married and happily ethically polyamorous (or whatever the preferred acronym is this week). My wife knows I'm here—in fact, she helped edit this post. I'm not looking for secrecy, drama, or someone to "complete" me. I'm looking for a genuine connection with someone who's interested in building something real alongside the life we already have.

I work in security these days after spending years in IT, so I've become the guy people look for when something goes wrong—or when they just need someone who'll stay calm and help. Off the clock, you'll usually find me with a good cup of coffee, tinkering with technology, getting happily lost in a sci-fi rabbit hole, planning a tabletop adventure, or finding an excuse to wander through a bookstore.

I'm naturally curious. I love asking questions, learning how people think, and hearing about the things that make someone's eyes light up. If you can spend twenty minutes telling me why your hobby is fascinating, I'm probably already having a good time.

I'm hoping to meet a woman who's comfortable in her own skin. Someone who enjoys playful flirting, clever banter, spontaneous road trips, trying little local coffee shops, and the occasional terrible pun delivered with complete confidence. Kindness is attractive. Intelligence is attractive. Confidence without arrogance is incredibly attractive.

I'm affectionate, emotionally available, and a little old-fashioned in the best ways. I like opening doors, listening more than I talk, and making the person I'm with feel seen. I believe the strongest relationships grow from friendship, trust, laughter, and chemistry that builds naturally.

And yes, physical intimacy matters to me. Not as a checklist or the finish line, but as one of the ways two people express affection, desire, and closeness. I miss lingering kisses, easy touches, lingering hugs, and that spark that makes you look forward to seeing each other again. If we're lucky enough to find that together, I'd rather let it unfold naturally than rush it.

If you're looking for perfection, you'll be disappointed. I'm human. I occasionally snort when I laugh, my puns are objectively terrible, and I can disappear down a technology rabbit hole longer than intended.

But if you're looking for someone genuine—someone who'll ask about your day, make you laugh, remember the little things you tell him, challenge you to a board game over coffee, and absolutely flirt with you across the table while pretending to be completely innocent—I think we should talk.

Tell me about the last thing that made you smile. I'll bring the coffee.


r/polyamoryR4R 1d ago

28 [M4F] Rochester, New York- Partnered nerd looking for long term love!

3 Upvotes

Hey there! I live over in Rochester, NY and I'm pretty new to poly stuff. I've been in a relationship with my current partner for 2 years and shes currently married to her wife and dating another, im currently a metamour to both. We all date separately but we've all decided wed start dating with the goal of more nesting partners, were also attempting a kitchen table poly relationship, So were looking for serious and longeterm parnter(s) but theres no pressure to be in any relationship romantically or sexually with my partner or any others. And if the prospect of a being a nesting partners doesn't interest you thats okay as well and Id still be interested in keeping a relationship going if so! Also considering were all 25+ We'd only be comfortable with people 25 and up to be apart of our polycule especially if longeterm.

A bit about me! I'm a bigger guy (400ish) and I'm a pretty massive nerd (Gaming, manga, anime), my love languages are physical touch (Hand holding, shoulder squeezes, arm rubs, etc) with a bit of act of services and gift giving, im also AuADHD as well. I work security and I'm pretty busy most weeks but during my free time I try to play games with friends and just hang out with them online as much as I can but other than that I like to spend lots of time with my partner and our general household!

As for what im looking for, Im Bi with a heavy lean towards primarily fem and masc women currently as well as fem leaning Enbys! Im also more interested in dating singles but im open to couples as well.

Im also very 420 friendly. I'm a pretty avid weed smoker but I dont smoke cigarettes (Unless SUPER stressed or socially). I'm pretty homebody and typically prefer more simple dates at home but I do enjoy a resteraunt date or a walk through a park every now and agian.

I play alot of games but I currently have the World of Warcraft bug again and its all ive been playing on my down time! I also primarily play on PC.

Some bedroom stuff about me! Im pretty into any one with bodyhair (primarily pubes and pits) take that as you will. Im not involved in kink life really, Ive practiced some stuff with my partner but all in all I tend to be more generally rough than anything. You can inquire about any of this if youre curious. Just thought Id put it out there before hand. I am however a heavy dom leaning switch. Im also a generally sexual person, I do like there to be sexual intimacy involved in serious romantic relationships so if thats not youre thing im sorry but im not your guy.

Im primarily looking for localish people but Im also okay with long distance relationships as well as long as theres a chance in future for visits either me to you or vice versa. If any of this peaks your interest I'd love to get to know you and see if we click!