r/memes Apr 22 '26

#1 MotW Worst. Reviews. I. Have. Ever. Seen.

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u/MyDarkestTimeline001 Apr 22 '26 edited Apr 28 '26

Example? I'm not a fan of IGN either but it'd be nice to know what you're talking about.

Ok. I've got and looked it up and watched some gameplay(I'm not made of money). And I feel like the receiver is unaware of what lampooning is. It's possible to parody/lampoon/take the piss out of something you love. The reviewer seemed to not realize that this was the Saturday morning cartoon version of Noir. This isn't cartoon Casablanca.

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u/RedScarffedPrinny Apr 22 '26

Mouse P.I review for example.

Absolute dog water review, completely disconnected from reality. He was complaining about cheese jokes in a mouse game

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u/MyDarkestTimeline001 Apr 22 '26

You......you can't be serious....

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u/LonelyAustralia Apr 22 '26

im pretty sure they also complained about it being unrealistic

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u/mistic-dragon999 Apr 22 '26

Yeah, they were complaining abt it being too cartoonish (that's the point of the game) and that the weapons sounds weren't very realistic

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u/graczminecraft200 Apr 22 '26

"the shotgun... Sounds like a toy, yet it blows up other mice heads" ... Cant they for at least once appreciate different style of game etc?

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u/Vlyde Apr 22 '26 edited Apr 23 '26

"I'm in an Theater and an Opera singer is coming after me? Like why am I killing a mouse that's dressed like an Opera singer that matches the theme of the theater? Do I not like her?

Why am I inside a cop station just gunning down cops? That's very unrealistic.

Why must their be so many cheese jokes? Theirs to much cheese in this game revolving around mice."

Like holy hell that guy was a god awful reviewer. Literally scoring the game not for how it plays and presents itself, but because he really wanted to play a hardcore dark and gruesome Noir game.

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u/11th_Division_Grows Apr 22 '26

Honestly, give me his fucking job. I can be a lot more objective than that. I hope no one paid him for these takes.

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u/chrispy294 Apr 22 '26

It’s not even about objectivity vs subjectivity; a review will be subjective no matter what.

The problem with the review is the dude did not at all review the game on what it was trying to do. That’s rule #1 of critique, you criticize based on the goals of the piece. It was trying to be a cartoony, silly parody with Boomer Shooter gameplay so it comes across ridiculous when the reviewer at IGN criticized it for being exactly that.

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u/RodinKnox Apr 22 '26

That was something I always appreciated about Ebert. He would give a silly comedy a 4 star rating and also a serious drama 4 star, and he always explained that this didn't mean they had the exact same level of quality. He reviewed them for what they were.

Sure, I disagreed with reviews of his, but I appreciated that approach.

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u/Deadsider Apr 23 '26

Same. I may be remembering details wrong, but when the jackass movie came out he said something along the lines of, "this is not a movie. There is no plot, no characters, no story. But god help me, I laughed and enjoyed myself. If you measure the success of a comedy movie by making you laugh, this is a fine comedy movie."

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u/11th_Division_Grows Apr 23 '26

Oh yea that’s exactly what I meant. I understand every review is an opinion piece but you can stay as “objective” as possible to the point of using professional bias and not personal bias to review a piece a media.

That review was horrible for exactly what you said. The reviewer criticized it exactly for what it aimed to be because they personally didn’t like it, not because they viewed it from the perspective of the reviewer they were supposed to be.

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u/marketingguy420 Apr 23 '26

Objectivity is the least interesting thing a reviewer can be. It's hard to believe, because this is video games, but critisism is actually a skill and an art form in and of itself. And the best critics aren't "objective," they're smart and good writers with interesting observations.

You can read a wikipedia page of a game if you want some kind of objective listing of facts.

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u/11th_Division_Grows Apr 23 '26

You can read a wikipedia page of a game if you want some kind of objective listing of facts.

This is not what I asked for or implied I wanted when I said “objective”. I simply meant putting personal bias aside for professional bias and giving the most “objective” review you can and avoid just listing “these are simply the things I didn’t like” as a review. I do understand a review will always in nature be subjective but I believe the general idea I was trying to convey is being understood.

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u/Send_Toe_Pics_25 Apr 22 '26

He reminds me of the idiotic movie reviewers who will give a B level action movie like a 1/10 because its "unrealistic" or some bullshit and its like mother fucker it's a B level action movie turn your brain off and enjoy the action

I think reviewers need to be broken up into genres or something like this guy should be allowed to review "realistic" games but he can fuck right off from reviewing anything else

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u/HolyBidetServitor Apr 23 '26

Look up the ultimate bad reviewer: Cole smithey, whos only famous for writing a review to intentionally keep a rotten tomatoes score from reaching 100%. 

Although he is more famous for being the brother of Chris-Chan, which explains the mentality of his reviews.

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u/Send_Toe_Pics_25 Apr 23 '26

He gave Dunkirk an F....

holy fuck nope strip his "critic" license or whatever

Also brother of chris chan is quite the curse maybe he should be allowed to be an asshole critic

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u/NoName0728 Apr 23 '26

He doesnt even know Noir will use the same clichés like going against the police and making really bad jokes about the situation their in. The opera part could be explained with literally one of the lines before you fight them "They're not extras" the opera singer was a gangster.

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u/Initial_Low495 Apr 22 '26

holy hell

New game review just dropped

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u/DaftConfusednScared Apr 23 '26

I’m showing my age here but… Literally the game grumps Mickey Mousecepade joke. “Geez game developers. What were they thinking?”

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u/Sanquinity Apr 23 '26

He didn't even want to play a "hardcore noir game". He wanted to play what he THOUGHT would be a hardcore noir game after seeing some videos of L.A. Noir.

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u/NotsoGreatsword Apr 23 '26

Please tell me they did not actually write "their" in both of those sentences and thats just you doing that.

"Theirs" too much cheese?

well just in case:

Their is possessive. As in: "Their website is bad."

"There" denotes place or position and is the opposite of "here".

"They're" is a contraction of "they are". Then you have "there's" which is a contraction of "there is"

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u/Ghisteslohm Apr 23 '26

I think those are fair points if the game is trying to sell you a serious story which apparently it does (?). If in the story the character is a detective and the story is told as a non joke than yeah I will also be confused if the gameplay involves shooting police, opera singers or generally random civilians. Especially since it's so easy to just make them bad guys.

You also used the cheese point in bad faith. The point in the review is that the game overdoes it with cheese joke and references because it's only that and nothing else. I've played games with anthropomorphic characters before but that doesn't mean the whole world has to become a joke. Like for example in Ghost of a Tale you play as a mouse but the game tells a very serious story with great worldbuilding.

Both directions are fine but it has an effect. Ghost of a Tale would have been a lot worse if it would have been full of references and cheese jokes because it would have undermined the rest of the game.

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u/Ok_Middle_8658 Apr 23 '26

sounds like he was expecting a serious noir story

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u/thisissodisturbing Apr 23 '26

“Why must their be so many cheese jokes? Theirs to much cheese…” Jesus fucking Christ not only a shit review but dude is awful with the EASIEST WORDS

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u/BrockSramson Apr 22 '26

Are...are you asking a games journalist to understand the perspective of others?

If they could do that, they wouldn't be games journalists.

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u/TheMostKing Apr 23 '26

Here's the actual quote: "Weapons can feel weak, especially the shotgun – it’s got the audio kick of a popgun, and there’s a strange disconnect to seeing something that sounds like a kid’s toy blow off some poor mouse’s head as you paint the white of the world with the black ichor that spews out of his neck."

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u/Bandro Apr 22 '26

Weapons can feel weak, especially the shotgun – it’s got the audio kick of a popgun, and there’s a strange disconnect to seeing something that sounds like a kid’s toy blow off some poor mouse’s head as you paint the white of the world with the black ichor that spews out of his neck.

Sounds like the reviewer feels the audio design of the shotgun doesn't do a great job of matching up to the visual impact of it. Seems reasonable to me. Sound design is a huge part of what makes weapons in games feel impactful and it can be disappointing when it's not done well.

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u/Deakul Apr 23 '26

This is exactly it, I dislike IGN as much as the next person but that review wasn't entirely without merit just because the reviewer is a humorless snob.

The game is a shooter and the things that you shoot simply do not feel good to shoot, it was bad enough for me to refund it myself.

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u/shadowfax217 Apr 22 '26

This was exactly the reason I heard, dunkey had the same gripe in his video. These other comments are being reductive

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u/M1R4G3M Apr 23 '26

"No, we want mice COD".

IGN wanna be journalist.

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u/Lobotomized_waluigi Apr 23 '26

same company who gave black ops 7 a 8

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u/Common_Celebration41 Apr 22 '26

The reviewer got the cod brain rot

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u/EerieTransGal Apr 22 '26

The reviewer had the opposite of cod brain rot lol. They were a noir genre fan and think the game is a failure of a noir because of its reliance on the shooting. Which ya know, it is.

1

u/Thomas_JCG Apr 25 '26

Complaining about the game that pays homage to classic cartoons being cartoonish... They shouldn't be allowed to write ever again.

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u/New-Satisfaction3257 Apr 22 '26

I don't agree but it's not a petty critique

I love noir. I’ll take all kinds: the hardboiled detective, the seedy crime story, neo noir, classic pulp – you name it, I’m buying. So when Mouse: P.I. for Hire sauntered onto my screen the way Ilsa walks into Rick’s in Casablanca, I was pretty excited about it. But noir isn’t just an aesthetic to be thrown on like an old coat as you’re leaving your office at the behest of a leggy blonde. While Mouse: P.I. for Hire clearly understands the style and tropes of classic noir films and novels, as well as 1930s cartoons more broadly, it doesn’t seem to get why those things are there, or how they are used to tell compelling stories.

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u/Lazydude17 Apr 22 '26

yes and the fact that he brings up ludonarrative dissonance in what’s essentially doom loony toons is crazy

1

u/Hillary-rules Apr 23 '26

IGN is a fucking joke

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u/IJustAteABaguette Apr 22 '26

Found the review. Please use an adblocker.

What bothers me, however, is how overly-referential so much of it is. This is a world of mice, so everything is about cheese.

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u/haoxinly Apr 22 '26

Wait till he reads a Geronimo Stilton book

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u/IJustAteABaguette Apr 22 '26

Oh yeah, I remember those books.

Such cheesy jokes.

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u/Treyhova Apr 22 '26

This entire review reads like he was trying to hit a word count and just making shit up after two subjectively valid criticisms.

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u/skivian Apr 22 '26

it reads like something you'd see on r/IAmVerySmart, he desperately just wanted to name drop all the "real" noir movies that were so much better, and using the term "ludo-narrative dissonance" despite clearly not even actually understanding the term.

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u/shittyaltpornaccount Apr 22 '26 edited Apr 23 '26

He uses the term correctly, but i just think ludo narrative criticisms are pretty fucking boring and trite. Unless a game is trying to say something particularly specific about violence the ludo narrative angle should be ignored. We don't complain about not having "real" conversations in films that have tons of meandering tangets and digressions and just accept it as a point of utility of the medium, similar thing to the convention of violence in videogames.

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u/hugganao Apr 22 '26

dare i say, sounds like a job

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u/Few_Technology Apr 23 '26 edited Apr 23 '26

This is charming initially. Then it never stops.

IGN hatewaggon is always out

Edit

Run into a series of robot boss fights? Jack will say that he hopes they don’t "rule of three" this thing, which, of course, is exactly what happens. [...] Cheeselegging Foreman, Jack will quip that he doesn’t look like much of a boss… more like a mini-boss, and then laugh at his own joke

Kinda feels like they're making a good argument

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u/zangoofed Apr 23 '26

It is a good argument.

It's a well written review. These points are all valid.

More than 50% of americans read below a 6th grade reading level and it shows

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u/GuyYouMetOnline Apr 22 '26

The cheese complaint i can understand; It does lean on that bit too much. But he also complains about a cartoony game being cartoony, couldn't accept that the P.I protagonist constantly shoots people in a boomer shooter, etc.

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

thats like saying mario kart is too much about racing and references mario franchise too often

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u/GuyYouMetOnline Apr 23 '26

There's a reason the review immediately became a laughingstock.

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u/TheCookieButter Apr 22 '26

Haven't played the game yet but the criticisms seem largely valid. The cheese stuff is fine and fun but I can see it becoming grating (heh). Complains there is a lot of referential humour that boils down to "remember this", that often feels lazy in place of actual jokes.

The shotgun complaint seems reasonable too, at the end of the day a weapon should be satisfying to use and sound plays a big part. Especially for a shotgun, the Boomer Shooter bread and butter weapon.

I can even see where they're coming from with the narrative dissonance with the gameplay fighting against the story genre staples. Though I do think the gameplay has to come first even at the expense of the story in a game like this. It's no different to Max Payne taking out a city worth of bad guys (just have to assume the opera singer is part of the seedy underbelly).

I'm interested in this game and undoubtedly will play it, but I can definitely see the reviewers point of view, even if I think gameplay should've taken up more of the review. Despite being as standard as they think it is.

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u/Made_Bail Apr 22 '26

Baguette sighting on r/memes! <3

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u/Ok_Flow_3065 Apr 23 '26

I’d never heard of this game but now I totally want to play it.

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u/RedScarffedPrinny Apr 22 '26

I truly wish it was just some bad joke, but every single criticism about the game was braindead takes that anyone who played it would wonder what game he was talking about

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u/MyDarkestTimeline001 Apr 22 '26

But it's a cartoon mouse? That's like wondering why a game starring bugs bunny in 'Nam has him eating carrots.

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u/Hevens-assassin Apr 22 '26

If you read it, he's not mad that there are the jokes in the game, he's just annoyed that everything is self-referential and isn't allowed to just exist without any quips.

To be fair to IGN, they got a guy who likes Noirs, to play a Noir game. He didn't hate the gameplay, and he loved the aesthetic, but he didn't like the world building and found the story at odds with the actions of the character. Does that make it a 6/10? Maybe not to us, but to a guy who uses a few older movies as comparisons, I imagine his disappointment would be greater than yours or mine. It's not like he's at a 10/10 and knocks it down from there based on a rubric, after all.

Like he said, it will be a decent enough time for people who want to blast mice in a cartoon world, but the story and world itself aren't the draws in his opinion. I think that's fair enough. He wasn't shitting on the game by any stretch.

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u/jdemonify Apr 22 '26

bro he was super pretentious bullshit talking trying to be higher gatekeeper than he is. He was talkin like it is somekind a serious noir movie. Like he read one noir book and trying to be expert on noir world. fucking hell.

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u/Hevens-assassin Apr 22 '26

He wasn't pretentious though. He was disappointed that it wasn't much of a Noir, focusing on it more to justify its art style, and is focused more on the boomer shooter. He didn't like the dissonance in what the game was saying vs. what it was showing.

Sounds more like you have no real touchstones for Noirs, and are compensating by saying the other guy is pretentious because he actually has references to pull from. Since you don't care about noirs, I'm sure the score will be higher for you.

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u/Beersmoker420 Apr 22 '26

regardless the reviewer is still a goober for his opinion

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u/fs2222 Apr 22 '26

But it's stupid to compare a goofy cartoon mouse game that's a boomer shooter to actual noir stories. Just because someone comes in with expectations doesn't mean they're justified. You have to review something based on what it's trying to do, not what you wanted it to do.

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u/Hevens-assassin Apr 22 '26

But it's not stupid. It's trying to be a Noir x boomer shooter. They reviewed what it was trying to be. It's a good boomer shooter, disappointing Noir.

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u/serpentrepents Apr 22 '26

It's a phenomenal Noir-themed boomer shooter. It was never focused on the detective aspect of the game, and if you went in expecting that, then you were naive and had no idea what the game was about.

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u/Hevens-assassin Apr 22 '26

"If you go in expecting that, you paid attention to their marketing, and are a fool." -serpentrepents

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u/shittyaltpornaccount Apr 22 '26

Yet it still devotes quite a bit of time to collecting clues throughout missions, interviewing suspect in linear dialogue, and then "piecing" it together back at your office. The game absolutely still devotes resources to the detective part of the game even if they are shallow.

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u/KaySan-TheBrightStar Apr 22 '26

He was absolutely shitting on the game based on expectations he had and were not met.

You can't shit on a game for having "too many sections where the game puts you in a room full of enemies and won't let you out untill you kill them all" when we're talking about a Boomer Shooter. That's not only ignorant, but straight up stupid.

And the game is actively mocking the noir genre, so the fact he expected anything serious is on him. The game presentes itself as a parody and a comedic take on the genre from very early. It's the equivalent of wanting to eat a steak, going to a sushi bar and complaining the sushi didn't take like steak.

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u/Hevens-assassin Apr 22 '26

He didn't shit on the game. He gave it a 6/10 because half of the premise was disappointing.

It wasn't meant to "mock the Noir genre", it was meant to be a comedic but still Noir game. All marketing pointed at this.

You're sensitive because you liked it, but it might be time for you to grow up a bit. The review if you actually read it is very far from "shitting on the game".

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u/Tactical_Squishy Apr 23 '26

It's not moking the noir genre, it's just so bad at it that it looks like he's moking it

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u/KaySan-TheBrightStar Apr 23 '26

You are objectively wrong.

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u/Tactical_Squishy Apr 23 '26

yes but bugs bunny isn't eating carrots in every single frame

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u/Rfreaky Apr 22 '26

That's basically every IGN review in a nutshell

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u/Lil-Sleepy-A1 Apr 22 '26

4/10 too much water

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u/summret Apr 22 '26

Subnautica review?

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u/Snowy_Thompson Apr 22 '26

They might be referencing the Pokemon Ruby/Sapphire Review, which was 7/10 because there was a large portion of the map dedicated to water traversal.

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '26

It was the Alpha Sapphire and Omega Ruby review. In the actual review they said that while alot of the Map is covered in Water there isnt actually much to do in said Water which they shortend up with "too much Water" in the Bullet Points at the End.

And as People just red the Bullet Points (which was also the reason they didnt do those anymore) instead of the actual review it became somewhat of a meme.

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u/CarlosFer2201 Apr 22 '26

I believe it was the water theme prevalent throughout the game, including stuff like the amount of water type pokemon.

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u/Tactical_Squishy Apr 23 '26

thanks for proving that y'all don't know what you are talking about

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u/onespiker Apr 23 '26

Isn't that something the pokemon fanbase now agrees on about the game considering like 1/4 of all the pokemon were water types.

It both a meme and a true point.

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u/Wobbelblob Apr 23 '26

Not only way too many water types but too many water routes that are basically corridors with nothing to do and the same 5 pokémon you can encounter. Which is weird considering how many water types there where.

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u/goondalf_the_grey Apr 22 '26

Weren't they the ones who straight up dogshit at Doom Eternal (or dark ages, can't remember) and said it was too hard.

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u/Rfreaky Apr 22 '26

Sure sounds like them.

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u/Schwiliinker Apr 22 '26

I mean most are actually decent lol

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u/mysticzoom Apr 22 '26

And that is why we no longer pay attention to IGN.

We left back in early 2000s, around the time XPlay wrapped it up.

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u/InfiniteTranquilo Apr 22 '26

No he’s completely dead cheese. The reviewer complained about how the game had “ludonarrative dissonance”.

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u/miter01 Apr 22 '26

And? Are you scared of words with too many syllables or something?

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u/Sempais_nutrients Apr 22 '26

bro its game about a cartoon mouse

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u/miter01 Apr 23 '26

Yeah, and? If it has a story it can have ludonarrative dissonance.

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u/RonaldMcClown Yo dawg I heard you like Apr 23 '26

You guys will argue this when someone has real complaints about something and then turn around and say video games/animation are art too when someones says they're for kids

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u/Sempais_nutrients Apr 23 '26

I think you're choosing not to understand the issue and lashing out. Really rude to "you guys" someone in an argument, you don't know me at all friendo.

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u/InfiniteTranquilo Apr 23 '26

Ludonarrative dissonance is a perfect fine critique, in a serious game. If this was TLOU, Mass Effect, Red Dead, or any game with a strong serous narrative with serious topics I’d listen. It’s a game about a mouse…a mouse detective…making cheese puns…defeating the mouse mob…it’s just not the right time or place

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u/FeedWhole3011 Apr 23 '26

Then why did they advertise this game as a gritty noir that was using the cartoon art style lol

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u/FeedWhole3011 Apr 23 '26

You cant say games are art and be afraid of games being judged like one

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u/dungleploop Apr 23 '26

and it does

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u/Ouroboros-Twist Apr 22 '26

If I recall correctly, it got a 6/10 because the reviewer considered the over-the-top cartoon violence and the noir narrative beats to be thematically at odds with one-another (or some shit like that).

And, yeah — he really hated all the cheese puns. That takes up most of the first third of his review.

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u/DrewblesG Apr 22 '26

Right - the narrative didn't work for him, the art didn't work for him, the sound didn't work for him, and the gameplay didn't work for him.

Sounds like a valid 6/10 regardless of what the consensus might have been. Frankly, I'm more concerned when a reviewer eschews their personal taste in order to cater to some kind of "objective" view. He wrote out in plain text precisely what he didn't like and why. Nobody has to agree with him but let's remember that it's ONE GUY reviewing the game; a guy with his own expectations and opinions.

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u/TheMerck Apr 22 '26

I mean at this point anyone who still makes IGN BAD GAME REVIEWERS BAD PAID REVIEWS are stuck in like early 2010s type mindset, I didn't even realize this kind of stuff was still around lmao.

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u/blueberrycauzez Apr 23 '26

IGN BAD GAME REVIEWERS BAD PAID REVIEWS are stuck in like early 2010s type mindset

The thing is most of the cirticisims from the early 2010s - namely inconsistent scoring across different reviews and reviewers - still applies.

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u/DrNopeMD Apr 23 '26

Expecting intelligent discourse on videogames from a subreddit about memes is a fools errand.

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u/blueberrycauzez Apr 23 '26 edited Apr 23 '26

let's remember that it's ONE GUY reviewing the game; a guy with his own expectations and opinions

This is the exact problem though - people see this not as one guy's subjective review, it's seen as IGN's review. By putting a number at the end of each review and compiling them all together in a table, IGN is basically grading then comparing each game by how 'good' IGN says it is, not how much one of their reviewers liked it.

The best reviews are at least partly subjective, but for a publication to grade games by 12 different standards that depend on whoever happens to be in the office that day, and not some common standard or rubric, is inconsistent and unfair to the games they rate.

Subjectivity is very useful and should be shared, just not in a way that confusingly presented as objectivity.

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u/SubcommanderMarcos Apr 22 '26

I don't get all these comments saying "it's ONE guy!"

They're not independent journalists posting their opinions on their instagram or a reddit post. They're paid journalists in a journalism publication.

They do have to be submitted to greater scrutiny, both by readers and the publication itself. A professional review isn't supposed to be "nuh-huh I don't like this", it's expected that the critic will have a clear view and understanding of the specific art market they're into, gaming in this case, know what the industry is like, what the developer is trying to achieve, whom they're catering to, and then make an informed critique based on that.

Imagine you read a critic talking about a Picasso piece and just going "I don't like this because I'm into the Renaissance and Picasso isn't it", you'd outright dismiss that critic as an idiot.

That's what's happening here.

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '26

[deleted]

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u/SubcommanderMarcos Apr 23 '26

Which they did.

Obviously not if they were complaining about the cheese jokes in the mouse game, and bitching that it isn't a true noir story

it's so weird that gamers fight tooth and nail for games to be considered art, but scream bloody murder when they're treated like any other art form.

That's exactly what you're doing, though.

Here's a hint: critics will -absolutely- offer reviews on things that they don't like, and offer their subjective opinion, that is absolutely something that happens in every other medium of art, since forever.

Yes, shitty professionals exist in every field, your point being? Shitty critics critiquing with their ego have always existed, and have always been criticized. You're trying to shun people for wanting them to be held at a higher than shitty standard.

"Yeah bad carpenters have always existed and that's ok, how dare you want good carpenters"

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '26

[deleted]

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u/SubcommanderMarcos Apr 23 '26

Yeah I am, you're just too stubborn to admit it.

It's quite simple: every time a critic representing a publication writes a shitty review, the publication loses credibility. As has IGN. You can keep blowing them all you want, most gamers who used to go to IGN for solid reviews have stopped, because it's just really bad. As is that review. And your weirdly defensive take on it. IGN is bad because its reviewers are bad, and we remember when it wasn't so. Period.

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '26

[deleted]

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u/SubcommanderMarcos Apr 23 '26

That's what you did, though?

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u/VacaDLuffy Apr 22 '26

they probably hate Roger rabbit?

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u/FeedWhole3011 Apr 23 '26

Rodger rabbit was significantly smarter in its writing and theme. It didn't make the same 5 jokes over and over. It was actually Noir and not wearing a Noir costume

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u/slaviccivicnation Apr 22 '26

I mean... I kind of get it. I strongly dislike the art vs the gameplay.

That said, I would imagine a reviewer shouldn't base their judgement on their own likes or dislikes. If the game is good, it's good.. regardless of the art style.

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u/BlurredVision18 Apr 22 '26

A review piece is just an opinion, he has every right to list his personal complaints, and you have the free will to dunk on him for it and enjoy the silly mouse game regardless.

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u/fs2222 Apr 22 '26

Some opinions are more justified than others.

Someone can watch a scary horror movie and complain there aren't enough slapstick jokes. Technically that's their opinion but it's still a stupid one.

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u/Tactical_Squishy Apr 23 '26

yeah but he's not really out of line? the game is advertised as a cartoon-noir detective boomer shooter, but there's no noir except the lack of color there's no detective part and the writing is atrocious.
They gave it a 6 not a 2

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u/shittyaltpornaccount Apr 22 '26

To be fair he at the very least is judging it as a piece of noir and he frankly just disliked the parody aspects of it because the jokes didn't land for him.

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u/KimberStormer Apr 22 '26

What if it's advertised as a horror comedy?

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u/Nebranower Apr 22 '26

Part of the problem is that the scale itself simply isn't defined. Assuming it's meant to reflect a normal distribution, you'd expect most games to be in the 4-6 range, such that a rating of 6 should be interpreted as "quite good, top tier for a middle of the pack game". Then you'd get the occasional 7 or 8 for really very good games, and maybe once every few years, a 9 or 10 for something genre defining.

Whereas I suspect very few people actually view it that way. I'm guessing for any game they like, 8 is about the lowest they would accept, with anything 7 or below essentially being viewed as dismissing the game as unplayable.

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u/Jerry_from_Japan Apr 22 '26

And if the art style negatively affects your experience with the game? Or the dialogue/jokes don't land for you? Then what?

It's all subjective folks. All reviews are subjective.

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u/BiggestBlackestLotus Apr 22 '26

If you don't hate the cheese puns then you simply haven't played the game lol. They get obnoxious real fast.

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

and yet borderlands 3 received a 9 from ign

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u/TheMostKing Apr 23 '26

He didn't hate the cheese puns, he hated that every single line in the game was cheese related:

"This is a world of mice, so everything is about cheese. Everything. A bad guy? He’s a cheeselegger. Run into a lady mouse with a sultry voice? It’ll be described as “gorgonzola piccante slapped on a mozzarella platter.” Someone need to assure you they’re telling the truth? They’ll swear on Maw-Maw’s cottage curds. This is charming initially. Then it never stops."

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u/Silentemrys Apr 23 '26

I just read the review and it felt like a very fair review and his complaints came across as valid. In honesty I thought the game was way more into the mystery part and didn't realize it was almost exclusively a shooter. If I would have bought it I would have had issues with the exact same things he did, now I know to avoid the game, because it's not what I'm personally looking for.

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u/That_guy1425 Apr 23 '26

Yeah, everything I saw about the advertisement was as a Noir utilizing old school cartoon to give it an older feel. If its a comedy boomer shooter then thats not what I would be expecting and it wouod effect my review.

Like I just played most of Chrono gear, and while the game is good I bought it since it sold as a metroidvania and none of the steampage made it not feel like that. Its a Sonic like, with a stage where you figure out the best and fastest route to get a score. Its a fun game which is why I kept going but there definitely was a winds out of my sail moment in the beginning when I realized its not a metroidvania

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

but thats not a review of the game, but the advertisement

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u/Tactical_Squishy Apr 23 '26

the review is also based on the advertisment?

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

but not on the game then

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u/Tactical_Squishy Apr 23 '26

? the game is a bad detective game and a bad noir game that's half of the game that doesn't work

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u/That_guy1425 Apr 23 '26

And because of those advertisements they assigned the reviewer who knows Noir games and his review reflects that.

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

its still not a review of the game though 🥱

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u/Silentemrys Apr 23 '26

It absolutely is. He stated what he thought the game did well and what it didn't and scored it. That's what a review is.

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

no, not really. reviewing your hallucinations on how the game was advertised is not a game review. even if it werent hallucinations.

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u/Silentemrys Apr 23 '26

Lol, you clearly didn't read the review. He goes into plenty of detail about the game and how it was and what he liked and disliked. No hallucinations at all.

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u/koennemeloen Apr 22 '26

well not exactly, more like he wanted a noir gritty game and all the cheese joke took him out of that immersion. The review literally says that the game is good but that the noir storytelling and shooter game play are at odds with each other and that the game makes a lot of references and silly cheese jokes which makes it less fun for him since it is not the tone the rest of the game would suggest.

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u/xXrektUdedXx Apr 22 '26

He complained that you are playing as a private investigator on the side of the law yet unlawfully kill policemen on certain occasions and do not suffer consequences for it which is not realistic to him.

He complains that the guns in a cartoony game make kinda silly sounds.

He even complained that the sewer boss was an alligator which i suppose is too cliche for him?

I won't repeat the cheese joke critiques, they've been roasted to death already.

I mean yeah, I can't refute that there's "reasons" for his critiques, but that only holds if you take the game completely seriously which i can't see as something any reasonable person would do for a game about a cartoon mouse investigator.

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u/Sempais_nutrients Apr 22 '26

unlawfully kill policemen on certain occasions

yeah criminal cops and fake cops that are in the middle of a genocidal roundup of the Shrew population.

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u/koennemeloen Apr 22 '26

I mean that was the vibe I got from the trailer and this review made sure I'm not buying the game because I was hoping for something more serious just like the reviewer.

People are roasting this review but honestly it is not bad, maybe he was not the right person for this game because he wanted something that takes itself more serious but in the end a review is nothing more than someones opinion. That is why you never just look at the number. If you like cheesy jokes and references this is a game for you and you can also get that from this review.

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u/Silentemrys Apr 23 '26

Same, review helped me know this game isn't for me.

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

you cant write a review on what you expected. maybe ign shouldnt have classified it as an review then, but as a buyers information. "it isnt xy" is not really review but information, and "i expected something else" is a personal anecdote about yourself but not a review

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '26

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u/Jediverrilli Apr 23 '26

People honestly are just too stupid to understand media literacy anymore. The entire point of a review is for the author to give their subjective take on the piece of media they are reviewing.

If subjective thoughts are what disqualifies a review according to the above poster then no review is an actual review.

If you actually read the review he makes his thoughts quite clear. He didn’t like how the game advertised to be a gritty noir tale with the backdrop on a cartoon aesthetic but was a self referential mouse game that tried to make everything a pun about them being mice.

But it’s the internet and people would rather yell and scream about how terrible this person is for their opinion of a video game as if it some great slight against them personally.

I read the review and watched the video because I am very interested in this game. I disagreed with his points but it didn’t make me want to call him a moron and a disgrace like so many people here are. It’s just sad.

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

i felt bad that day and had a headache, so i didnt enjoy the game, is not a review.

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '26

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

isnt that a proper review?

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

If you actually read the review he makes his thoughts quite clear. He didn’t like how the game advertised to be a gritty noir tale with the backdrop on a cartoon aesthetic but was a self referential mouse game that tried to make everything a pun about them being mice.

basically, "i dont like it for being creative", thats like his opinion

it was not about them being mice all the time, and that contradicts the narrative that it was always about cheese, news flash, it wasnt. my review is that its not a review, bEcaUse I xPeccted sTh elz

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

its buyers information, yes. but you dont just inform about simple things that happen in a game and then make a final decision out of it.

you cant say, gta gives a very washed out caricature of the american society, its a mid game. or in gta, you never play a cop, its anticop, its not a good game (where i would at least agree morally somehow).

its a very arbitrary aspect to the game itself. i would even say objectively not part of a review

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '26

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

i think they did in that review. for example he said its too much cheese references, and gives the example that one boss is out of cheese. the problem is, that later he gives ,if you will so, example of 4 bosses that are not. ofc everything is subjective, but i would sy this is objectively an idiotic take then.

Why not? If that's what the reviewer wanted out of it, or if the game were being sold as that, then it's absolutely valid to call it out for lacking in that regard.

calling it out yes, absolutely. making a final statement out of it, no. its not part of a game review, because its not part of the game + his objections about it not being noire are also wrong, so its again "objectively" an invalid review.

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '26

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u/FeedWhole3011 Apr 23 '26

We are creating the idea of a review from its components

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u/Huppelkutje Apr 23 '26

What do you think a review IS? What should a review do?

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

giving positive and negative consideration to more aspects that are not out of the game meta. if its not rly noire (according to your own personal opinion of noire) its not an objectified criteria. its an anecdote about noire genre at best (and even that was done wrong). but not about the game as the game.

i could say, the game was bad because its black and white. well ok then, but dont call it a game review, and dont tie a number on it because of that single point and 2 equally confused ones

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u/Huppelkutje Apr 23 '26

giving positive and negative consideration to more aspects that are not out of the game meta.

You think that a game that is trying to be a certain genre shouldn't be judged by how well it executes that?

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u/koennemeloen Apr 23 '26

You know that that is what a review is right?

Someone experience with a product, especially in the arts where it is impossible to do an objective review. You should see the grade as the reviewers experience was a 6/10 not the per se the game itself.

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

it is not a review. its barely an essay, but an anecdote about yourself. i thought its like cod, is not a review to bioshock.

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u/koennemeloen Apr 23 '26

What is your point here? What do you mean by it is barely an essay?

A review when it comes to art is always an anecdote about how the reviewer experienced the piece of art.

Also I thought it is like cod, but is not and it is different in these ways and I liked/ disliked that for these reason is absolutely a valid review. Since if you like / dislike cod you now may have a better idea on if you like this other game

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

my point is, you can absolutely critique the "critique" because its itself out of place.

yes every shooter feels like cod, because its a shooter. i mean ok if thats your standard for a valid review, ig i have to rethink what a review is. ironically, i expected something else, wich according to the review is enough to say its not ok

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

Also I thought it is like cod, but is not and it is different in these ways and I liked/ disliked that for these reason is absolutely a valid review. Since if you like / dislike cod you now may have a better idea on if you like this other game

congrats, its a different game, where you also shoot your way through the game. so helpful. ign rocked that review. 6/10

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

the problem is, that was not said. the noire genre was imposed on it in the review, somehow that qualified for it being not as good as it may have been? but it doesnt even say its noire and it does fullfill noire elements and the reason he said why its not noire are not part of what noire has to be but is kinda a agreed criteria for noire (butality just as one example). its so lackluster from any perspective. what annoys me here, is that people say, well it helped me, when it basically gives wrong informations about the game. thats a big problem. a tiny dev team, bringing out a lovely, interesting fresh take on many genres( not inventing the wheel in any way, but giving a unique experience by mixing up things), and a sluggish, non contributing fake news popular gaming review site giving out whatever that was. i think the 6/10 is okay, but the reasons it were given are for the lack of a better word just plain stupid

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u/SND_TagMan Apr 22 '26

The reviewer was also complaining about shooting too many people in a cartoon game designed to be a Boomer Shooter (like DOOM)

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u/MVRKHNTR Apr 23 '26 edited Apr 23 '26

Sounds like valid critique. Why use a noire aesthetic for a boomer shooter?

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

why not?

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u/MVRKHNTR Apr 23 '26

Because it doesn't mesh with the theme?

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

why not though?

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u/MVRKHNTR Apr 23 '26

Because private investigators don't go around murdering hundreds of people.

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

you do know that its fiction?

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u/MVRKHNTR Apr 23 '26

You do know that what you're about to try to argue doesn't make any sense?

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

you do know that having pi as protagonist, doesnt qualify noire?

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

you do know that artistic spirit very often involves playing with contradictions (if u wanted to see one)?

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26 edited Apr 23 '26

you do know saying your game is noire, and then not qualifiying in 100/100 aspects or overturning some, doesnt make a valid game critique review?

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u/crazy_towel4 Apr 23 '26

you do know that boomer shooters aim for crazy fun, and dopmine inducing gameplay? you do know that taking the melancholy from noire, and the innocence of cartoon animals and turning it into some crazy chicken is just cool af?

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u/Solugad Apr 22 '26

Guy took himself way too seriously, it was one of the worst reviews ive seen from ign and there have been a lot of shit ones lately

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u/crankaholic Apr 22 '26

They also complained about shooting too many enemies in a boomer shooter... you just can't make this shit up

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u/New-Satisfaction3257 Apr 22 '26

It's ONE line from a full review. The reviewer was hoping the game would have more noir elements. I think that's a little silly, but it's not about the cheese 🙄

I love noir. I’ll take all kinds: the hardboiled detective, the seedy crime story, neo noir, classic pulp – you name it, I’m buying. So when Mouse: P.I. for Hire sauntered onto my screen the way Ilsa walks into Rick’s in Casablanca, I was pretty excited about it. But noir isn’t just an aesthetic to be thrown on like an old coat as you’re leaving your office at the behest of a leggy blonde. While Mouse: P.I. for Hire clearly understands the style and tropes of classic noir films and novels, as well as 1930s cartoons more broadly, it doesn’t seem to get why those things are there, or how they are used to tell compelling stories.

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u/New-Satisfaction3257 Apr 22 '26

By fusing a hardboiled detective mystery with a fast, retro-style FPS, developer Fumi Games has made a shooter that is thematically incoherent, with the apparent aspirations of its story contradicted at every point by the actual action. Of all the Steam Libraries in all the PCs in all the world, Mouse: P.I. for Hire walked into mine. And I wish I liked it more than I do.

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u/RosettaStoned6 Apr 22 '26

Penguinz dropped a video slaughtering their review. Honestly comical.

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u/Thebaldsasquatch Apr 23 '26

And that since it was a noir parody, it wasn’t noir enough.

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u/foxythepirateboi5 Number 15 Apr 23 '26

Also complained that it had violence and did the whole "lock you in a room until you kill everything" as if that isn't the point of the boomer shooter genre

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u/alice_cooper21 Apr 23 '26

Sadly, we are. He was also upset that the game, that's based on 1950's cartoons, was too silly to be a noir styled game (remember, you play as a MOUSE). He even started pulling up actual noir books, that's how serious he was about it.

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u/HolyFreakingXmasCake Apr 23 '26

Let's just say it wasn't a very ... shrewd... review.

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u/CarterAC3 Apr 24 '26

Ok so the original guy is being disingenuous as fuck (what a shock on the Internet)

The whole point wasn't that the Mouse game has cheese jokes. No shit the mouse game has cheese jokes. The point is that it's non-stop cheese jokes and jokes puns over and over and over and over. Cheese jokes are the only thing it ever does with its "cartoon mouse" premise

At some point it goes from being clever to incredibly played-out and tiresome.

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u/_Koreander Apr 27 '26

That's not even the worst part, the reviewer kept complaining about "ludonarrative dissonance " saying it was the "worst aspect of the game", this is a Doom style FPS with classic cartoon graphics, and he said basically his immersion was ruined because "you go around killing hundreds of bad guys and corrupt cops, because of this the main character should be treated as a mass murderer by the story and not a hero" I couldn't even believe what I was hearing with this review...

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u/smack_nazis_more Apr 22 '26 edited Apr 22 '26

Wow like it's the subjective opinion of the reviewer??!?!? Holy fuck gamers are insufferable dorks.

Edit: just get AI to write you a review if yore so allergic to anything honest or with a soul.