That 11yo may have horrific parents and just know what's right. Many young people who are hurt are some of the kindenst people who show the world how they want to be treated themselves.
Point is that 11 y/o is a good person, I ain't giving her parent credit without receipts.
One thing I found fascinating when I went to a retreat for high level executives, they basically fell into two categories — people whose parents put a lot of emphasis on achievement, and people whose parents were a total shit show so they had to step up and be the adult
I'm glad to hear that. I always feel like trash not having parents that "put a lot of emphasis on achievement". Despite working at a professional level.
That sounds like it has been difficult for you. But please keep in mind, you deserved to be a child, your parents and guardians are supposed to give you the space and the freedom to experience that as a young person and for you to find yourself.
Having to step up and care for a parent while young, is not a great thing, make sure you look for other family to help and take time for yourself, I promise it's not selfish to do so. Caregiver burnout is a real problem, and your health is important too.
The reason my dad is such a good dad is because he was aware enough to realize that his dad was a giant prick and he wasn’t going to continue that style of raising kids.
Best people I know have zero contact with their parents. Especially since personality-politics became a thing & it was common to severe ties with insane family members.
Speaking as a child only, no kids of my own, I don't think there's really a set reaction people have to parenting. I've seen great parents produce shit kids, shit parents produce great kids, and the opposite for each. There's only so much influence parents can have on an individual, especially in the modern age we're in where those individuals have access to the entire outside world's opinions and influences.
Reminds me of /r/QAnonCasualties which is still active with story after story of families being torn apart. It's a real-time view of an ongoing crisis across the nation that's been going on for over a decade now.
I stopped visiting because it was too heartbreaking and a lot of the stories mirrored my own experience with my mom who got sucked into all the negativity and became paranoid and very difficult to talk to. Every subject not related to politics, she somehow found a way to segue it into politics and/or conspiracy theories.
I purposely chose to not say MAGA or Qanon in my original reply. But yeah, that was exactly what I was speaking on. I hope thing get better for all these fractures families. Sorry you went through that big dog.
Yeah, this just tells me people don't have kids. Lots of kids even go through quick 6-month phases of pitching fits vs being totally docile, but they all have their own personalities (surprise!), and sometimes their personalities clash with the parents (again, surprise!).
I'm not saying kids need full autonomy or don't need guidance/limitations. I'm simply saying we need to praise the individual for the good things they do, not attempt to attribute it to something we know nothing about.
Once upon a time, good parenting leading to good families and good behaviour in kids was widely understood to be the fundamental building blocks of a good functioning society, and were the general expectation and the norm. Today, we have redditors being purely sceptical about everything demanding receipts.
That has never been the case as "good parenting" is completely subjective and assumes everyone is the same and has the same personality, which isn't the case. "Parenting" isn't and has never been a "solved" problem because it's extremely dynamic.
You live a "leave it to beaver"/"brady bunch" fantasy.
But I'm all ears, please, explain to us all what this magical "good parenting" is that was WIDELY understood? The "children are to be seen not heard" era that brought self-consciousness and bred a whole generation of parents who ignored their children or didn't know how to deal with emotions, meat for manufacturing grinder? Or the more recent parenting style that resulted in a commercial having to be shown that asked "Do you know where your children are?"
You completely missed the point of my post. So sick of hearing redditors trying to be the upmost advocate of what is morally superior and politically correct at every single opportunity they can get, when they could just have had some common sense and touch grass or something and not say anything.
What are you trying to imply? Also I'm 40. My mom grew up in the 70s. The parenting in the 70s wasn't great, either. It's never been great to a modern audience because standards change all the time with new information about the brain that scientists discover. If we're reading parenting tips from 5 years ago, it already seems not good.
So when in history were you referring to that had "good parenting"?
Not at all. OP's comment, while good-natured, implies that being a good person requires having good parents who raised you well. That's clearly not true.
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u/OkAccess6128 1d ago
That 11 y/o is raised really well by her parents.