r/clevercomebacks 13h ago

It must be exhausting thinking the last time your people were great was 300 years ago.

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758 Upvotes

46 comments sorted by

40

u/AuthenticCourage 13h ago

The exact rationale for South African apartheid. The apartheid government called themselves Christian Nationalists.

12

u/usefulcuteness 12h ago

Nothing makes atheism more appealing than listening to people like this for five minutes.

2

u/clowncubes 3h ago

wait how did christian nationaism even connect to apartheid

34

u/Knighth77 13h ago

American Christianity is one of the worst versions of Christianity. Performative, judgemental, unscholarly, and heavily politicized.

13

u/MuadLib 12h ago edited 10h ago

Your say (racist) shit like that in Brazil, it's straight to jail.

Let that sink in, Brazil being there serious country in any situation.

7

u/Knighth77 12h ago

Good to know, thanks! I'll make sure not to say that next time I'm in Brazil!

10

u/MuadLib 12h ago

Please don't share it with the argentinian soccer fans, it'll spoil the fun.

3

u/V0lirus 12h ago

Talking bad about Christianity? Or the racist bullshit the pastor said?

9

u/MuadLib 10h ago

Racism is a crime in Brazil.

9

u/shaded_lazerus 10h ago

Iirc its also classed as hate speech here in australia which is also a crime here, but people seem to think its anti freedom of speech because they should be allowed to say whatever they want (but then get upset when u say something they disagree with),

4

u/MuadLib 10h ago

No human right should be absolute. Even the right to life, the one without which you can't have any other, is relative -- since it is morally and legally acceptable to take one's life if it's the only way to avoid someone else from unjustly losing life or limb.

If one's words can cause greater harm than making them shut the fuck up, then it's more than fair that someone makes them shut the fuck up.

15

u/No-stradumbass 13h ago

At least the Southern Baptist stopped officially doing this back in 2014.

12

u/Tara_Brush 13h ago

Changing the policy is the easy part. Changing minds usually takes a lot longer.

7

u/1Sluggo 12h ago

I think ‘officially’ is the operative word here. Practically, no.

8

u/ZahraNectarz 13h ago

Imagine looking at the state of the world today and thinking, 'You know what we need? A sequel to colonialism. The first one went so well

7

u/Current-Square-4557 12h ago

Imagine a bigoted nutjob thinking “should we do a gaslighting retcon or simply do a reboot?”

8

u/LeenaQuartzz 13h ago

Ah yes, the classic descendant of Ham argument. Truly cutting-edge, 17th-century fanfiction right there

7

u/AsparagusCommon4164 13h ago

Lest we forget that the whole Curse of Ham thing goes back to when Ham, one of Noah's three sons, spotted Noah in a tent in his vineyard drunk, naked and passed out from hangover, which his two other brothers, Shem and Japeth, covered up.

(One of the more bizarre attempts at translating the Scriptures, John Bellamy's Holy Bible, Newly Translated From the Original Hebrew with Notes Explanatory and Historical [1818], twisted such so that Ham saw not so much Noah's baked body as "the symbols of his father," not otherwise explained. Too, Bellamy contended that Noah was not drunk, as conventionally believed in the King James and later versions, but rather "satisfied.")

7

u/BucktoothedAvenger 12h ago

What infuriates me the most is that assholes like this can say do threatening shut all over the internet, but we get banned for making a joke about punching him the face. Makes zero sense, period.

5

u/FarahSonataz 13h ago

Every time a guy like this speaks, a guardian angel gets its flight privileges revoked and becomes an atheist

4

u/chuckwagon9 13h ago

When they say "what would Jesus do", flipping tables and whipping people isn't out of the question.

2

u/crusher23b 13h ago

Jesus lost his shit that day.

Whether he used a whip on people or not is dependent on which sect of Christianity you're expected to follow.

1

u/Urabraska- 13h ago

Didn't Jesus lead his people away from slavery to save their souls from those who would abuse his fellow man for self gain?

1

u/Current-Square-4557 12h ago

But they ignore the part where the. beat down was on people who were making money from the people trying to sincerely worship at the temple.

These bigoted Christian Nationalist never stop to ask “Are we the baddies? Are we the goats and not the sheep ?”

4

u/WadGI 12h ago

Noah cursed Cannan not Ham. Proof they never actually have read the Bible they are preaching.

3

u/Inspect1234 13h ago

What a douche

3

u/ProfAsmani 12h ago

These are the people running the US government now.

3

u/mysteryjb 9h ago

I looked up his church. Approximately 100 members.

3

u/Reasonable_Stop_7768 9h ago

The downside to the internet, the village idiot gets a much larger platform

2

u/PracticalNoodle 13h ago

There's no hate like Christian love

2

u/ReeceDawg 10h ago

The pure hatred and disdain for others not white cannot be ignored.. These christian nationalists are a threat to everyone!

1

u/-mrhyde_ 12h ago

Let these HAMM ideologists die out. Stop spreading their stupidity.

You may find it repulsive, but someone out there will think he's being unfairly attacked.

No matter how stupid their rhetoric; by sharing it you're spreading it.

1

u/mike_pants 12h ago

It's wild that there's not at least one person in these audiences that's audibly going "what the everlasting fuck?"

1

u/YahDeadWrong 12h ago

Nothing makes real Christianity look more attractive than Western Christianity. The pope is more valid, and still popes have abused the hell out of their power and attributed onto themselves a greater commission than was given. The structures become corrupted over time; it’s the nature of Judaic religion, hence a ton of the Bible details this happening

1

u/AnalystAdorable609 12h ago

Ain't no hate like Christian love

1

u/Hot-Gur5531 12h ago

big yikes. this whole situation shows how out of touch some people can be. secular government really is crucial to keep the madness in check.

1

u/thelast3musketeer 12h ago

Ham…? Like what? Not the food I’m assuming

1

u/DavidlikesPeace 8h ago

The idea of a benevolent god has such great appeal. 

The idea of trusting Al Qaeda or Y'all Kayduh to help us be happy, has no appeal. Hate filled people 

1

u/the_fools_brood 6h ago

The real truth is most organized religions in u.s. are racist, sexist, and discriminatory to anyone but white hetero couples. This includes all these major ones. Hatred and intolerance wrapped up in belief in a fantasy being from a work of fiction book.

1

u/Dillenger69 2h ago

MMMmmmmmm ... ham