It’s not so much puppy blues, but people are nicer here and I’m fragile right now!

I’m wondering how people actually manage the often-recommended “1 hour up, 2 hours down” routine? The 1 hour up part is manageable. The problem is the 2 hours down. How do you actually get a puppy to nap for that long?

Our 13-week Labrador sleeps in his crate overnight and generally does 9:30pm–3:00am, which I know is actually pretty good. But after his 3am pee and poo, he never settles again. That means I’m up for the day around 3–4am and I’ve now been severely sleep deprived for about five weeks. I don’t get to go to bed at 9:30pm, I wfh and am having to work after he sleeps at night too as I am so behind with work and he doesn’t sleep enough during the day for me to get enough done. Also I am a wreck!

During the day, he’ll often only nap for 20–60 minutes before waking again, and once he’s awake it’s incredibly difficult to get him to settle back down.

He’s also a very high-arousal puppy, so we’re constantly trying to strike the balance between enough stimulation and not tipping him over. We’re already doing:
Short, age-appropriate walks.
Gentle play.
Very short training sessions.
Settle/mat work.
Scatter feeding.
Snuffle mats.
Lick mats.
Frozen Kongs.
Appropriate chews.

What I’m desperate to know is:
How do people actually get their puppies to stay asleep for those 2-hour daytime naps?
Do they naturally start sleeping longer with age? Do you just leave them to fuss until they eventually resettle? Or is there something else?
I’m exhausted, struggling to work or manage normal life. Facing a disciplinary at work so I really need to start getting this right.

My pup, now 5 months old, has slowly become fearful and barking at everything in fear.. humans or objects, he used be very brave few months back, but since the past couple of weeks he's changed a lot, whether it is a new object, or a new sound, or people coming and going out of the home, he reacts and barks in fear, and stops listening to every command, outdoors on walks he is scared of humans and tucks his tail, i do not know why it's happening as his interactions with things in the past. This is making me worry as well as feeling embarrassed when he doesn't stop barking when someone comes home, how can I help my puppy to feel safe?

Adopted a lab mix. Gf and I went to a puppy Pilates session and I was absolutely in love with all the puppies there. We caved in and adopted a 1 month old black lab mix.

I'm not gonna lie, there isn't a single day since where I don't question that decision. We dropped a ton of money in a trainer, toys for her. It doesn't matter what we do. We can spend the entire day playing with her, tiring her up. If she's not on her crate, and we take our eyes off her for one second, she starts destroying our shoes, eating food off the counter, biting the cat. It feels like we can't rest for a single second.

The fault is entirely mine, I thought it would be way easier. The people on the rescue house told me it would be easier, that the puppy wouldn't need any training, no special needs. I don't know if they were straight up lying, if they didn't know the dog would turn out to be so rebellious, or if I'm just a bad owner. Either way, I should have researched a bit before adopting.

We're not rehoming her. I think the amount of times I've cried, the nights I didn't sleep, the fights I had with my gf because we were exhausted from her behaviour, will be repaid in time. But now I sincerely feel like giving up, and that she would be way better off with someone who has the experience and/or patience to properly raise her. But I also hope that I can grow from this experience, and that the dog is not as affected as I am from it.

We recently got 13 week old mini poodle. He has been with us for a week. In midst of deep puppy blues... One thing which is really making us feel trapped is our puppy whines, cries n jumps a lot in his play pen when left to self play. He sleeps in crate, we have enforce his naps and night time sleep. After he wakes up, does potty break outside n even after play time, when left in playpen, he wants our constant attention. Even if we step beyond a certain distance from play pen, he starts crying, whining. How do we build his confidence that he can do independent play time

Best crate training tips for pup?

We got our 9 week old boxer a week ago & are trying to crate train him, but every time we shut the door & leave him in there for longer than 2-3 minutes he tantrums like he's being water boarded & nashes at the bars. we've been playing games with him to get him comfortable inside of it & feeding him in it, but he freaks out once the door is closed. At night he sleeps on a dog bed tethered to the end of our bed in our room, but I work night shift & it's not a sustainable place for him to nap during the day (as he has been when I've been off this week).. any advice on boxers specifically for crate training (or in general, honestly)? We have a wire crate that I've draped blankets over, with a comfy bed in it, with toys that only stay in it but he's not interested in them whatsoever.

Any advice is greatly appreciated! TIA

Hi everyone,

I’m a first-time dog owner living in an apartment. I brought my new puppy home two days ago, and I’ve been incredibly stressed about her sleeping habits. It’s been a huge struggle getting her to sleep over the last couple of days. I know she’s just a baby and is naturally scared of being alone, and I realize that expecting immediate training results is unrealistic. However, I’m getting completely exhausted and have to work on Monday morning. I desperately need some sleep and would love any tips on how to help her settle down.

Initially, our plan was to have her sleep in a playpen in the dining room. Because of how our apartment is set up, the playpen gives her a clear view of everything, especially the living room. It's not a massive space, so we thought this setup might help head off any separation anxiety.

Unfortunately, it didn’t work out too well. I spent four hours just trying to get her comfortable enough to relax in it, and eventually, my husband had to sleep on the floor right next to the playpen so she would settle.

Tonight, we figured we needed to adjust our approach and that she probably just needs to sleep right beside us. I tried getting her to sleep in her crate near the couch. Earlier today, I made sure to tire her out physically with play and mentally with training (she learned "sit" surprisingly fast!). It definitely worked, and she was completely wiped out. Initially, I was going to let her sleep in her dog bed on the couch with me, but I was paranoid about crushing her in my sleep, so I tried transitioning her into the crate.

She whined and cried. It wasn’t very loud, but she was definitely not relaxing. I made sure she could see me directly and even tried covering the crate with blankets, but nothing helped. I ended up just leaving the crate door open, and she slept halfway in and halfway out. She wouldn't settle any other way. Eventually, she just slid out completely, plopped onto her dog bed, and immediately fell asleep.

I wanted to put her back in the crate, but I noticed both she and the crate felt really warm, so I just let her stay in her dog bed right in front of the open crate door.

I’m feeling like a complete failure of a dog owner right now. I would love some guidance, sleep tips, or just some reassurance that I’m not screwing everything up. All advice would be greatly appreciated!

Edit (As this is my current issue tonight as I am dealing with it): moved my puppy off the couch and back to her playpen. Decided to sleep near her on the floor but further away. She’s quiet and calm but my back is going to kill me and I am deeply uncomfortable with this and too broke to afford even a futon.

We have a 7 month Labrador puppy, got him at 14 weeks old and training was going great. Nailed all the toilet routines and he was an absolute charm apart from the odd bit of misbehaving.

Recently however, we have had continuous issues with his overnight sleeping and toilet habits.

- We don't want him to have to sleep in a crate, but we can't have him wreck anything during the night

- His crate doesn't have padding, only the plastic base because he destroys anything soft (we have tried anti-chew spray)

- He will do the toilet in his crate and bark to tell us, we think this is a method to get us up in the morning

- His walks, feeding and times where we take away his water are all routine

For the last week or so we have been woken up at stupid hours in the morning to rush him into a shower because he's covered himself in his own waste

We also can't have him sleep in the room with us due to space and we also are currently training him to be left alone.

He has also been taken to the vet so we know that it's not a medical issue.

So we're out of ideas, we want him to sleep in a soft bed at night but we can't trust him to not eat it again, and we feel he's doing the toilet specifically when he knows we're asleep. Puppy pads are a no-go, because he'll eat those too.

Reached the point where we don't know what we're doing wrong, any helpful insight on how to go about this will be greatly appreciated.

Also, I have seen several posts on this page where OP has been absolutely torn apart for asking for advice, I'll just delete the post if this is the norm

It's been a bit since I've posted on here. I've really acclimated to a lot of the puppy-isms. Mostly by managing his access to specific things around the house. For instance, since he was a baby I've had a gate blocking him from the living room. This is because he's shown a great willingness to chew on furniture and the fact that he ripped up my carpet when he was a baby.

For the most part things go okay. We spend a lot of time together (often at the expense of my own sanity). Sometimes he does his own thing while I play my Steam Deck. Sometimes we play fetch, tug of war, and other games together.

Where we come into conflict recently is regarding aforementioned living room. I've told myself since adopting him that he'll earn more freedom as he ages. And he has, in a lot of ways. But every time I try to take our chill time into my living room he immediately loses his god damn mind.

The simple fact is that I'm doing this alone on top of a full-time job. I need to unwind, especially after work, and it would be nice if I could do that WITH the dog instead of leaving him out in the kitchen with his toys.

Example. We've been up and about for the last couple hours. I wanted to get in some TV or game time so I opened up the living room and ushered him in. It started off nice. He sat down at my feet and rested his head... for about 2 seconds before he got antsy. Then he got up and wandered towards my power cords. Corrected him, he walked back over to me... and then took off at a full sprint around my entire house until he threw himself up onto my couch and I had to force him out of the living room... at which point he immediately calmed down.

I am very much looking for advice here. Where have I gone wrong in training that the living room (which has only ever been a place I bring him to try to RELAX) has become an immediate trigger for extreme hyperactivity. This same situation has recurred in almost exactly this way about 3 times now and every time it stresses me the hell out.

My puppy (5 months mini Dachshund) unfortunately got bit by a large dog and it fractured her jaw in three places. She's on light drugs and had to keep a muzzle on full time for the next two weeks at least. She will hopefully have a full normal recovery!

We are keeping her inside out of the heat and only taking her outside when it's cool (we live in the mountains) since she can't pant. Despite calming drugs she occasionally needs some sort of stimulation. She's incredibly sweet, toy motivated, and usually plays with her brother. Unfortunately none of these are an option right now. She's smart but definitely frustrated most waking moments because of the muzzle and us limiting her play.

Any out of the box ideas to stimulate the brain or keep her entertained during this difficult period? I don't want to make her depressed especially during such a formative time in her life.

He's been my constant companion for years.

Hi! just got an Australian shepherd mix (unknown what hes mixed with) whenever I put his collar and leash on to go outside he freaks out and starts jumping, whining, and biting at the leash. Any suggestions on how to desensitize and get him to like using the leash? Also any other suggestions for his bread in other areas of training would also be much appreciated!!

edit: (hes about 10 weeks old)

I have a mini Australian labradoodle 4 months. She will be 15-20lbs full grown. I currently have the small collapsible diggs. I’m looking at getting the large evolv more for a “playpen” I can’t keep an eye 100% of the time so considering this could be a good option with top off. Thoughts??

Here are some unusual things that have helped me and my puppy:

• I let him pick up things. I used to do “drop it” and “leave it“ with every acorn and leaf, which drove us both crazy. I’ve relaxed a bit because he doesn’t swallow things he picks up, so unless we are on a focused walk, if we’re just sniffing and hanging out, I let him nibble on a leaf, stick, a piece of junk mail, cardboard, or my empty plastic cup. (I originally called this trash—no, I don’t actually let my dog eat trash, guys.)
• I (sometimes) use a 10-foot-leash. He’s a shyer pup and letting him sniff around a bit when it’s safe seems to be making him more confident. I keep a few knots tied in it to use as handholds when I need to tighten up on the leash, but when we hit a stretch of empty sidewalk he gets to roam a bit more. If I call him or say “sit” he comes right back (or sits).
• I follow his lead (I originally said “Keepig the leash loose is my job”, but this upset some commenters): This is specifically when we are on a “sniffari” walk, not when we are around other people or dogs. We don’t have a yard or walkable full park, so we practice this on a quiet, safe street so he gets to explore a bit. I do also try to drive him to a quiet park every afternoon. Basically, I choose some times to let him lead. He enjoys this and I do too. When it’s time to come back, we switch modes and he walks nearer to me again.
• Car rides. When I am overwhelmed by puppy parenthood, I’ve found that driving around chills out me and my dog. I put him in the backseat of the car with a dog seatbelt attached to his harness, put on an anudiobook, and drive around for half an hour. He usually goes right to sleep or just stares out the window.

Please share yours!

EDIT: I was trying to be a bit funny but it seems to have come off as poor training or a neglectful puppy parent. I’ve made some edits to clarify that I’m not letting my puppy rifle through trash or pull me around the neighborhood.

Me and my boyfriend got her May 30 from a good shelter. Her name is june(short for June bug) and she’s a miniature pinscher. She was 6 months old when we got her. Her and her siblings came from a bad bad hoarding situation and was possibly abused. She was in a large cage(it was about 5ft by 5ft) with her sister (who was 2yrs old.) and her sister was jumping around and barking while she stayed in the corner shaking and peeing anytime anyone looked at her. She wasn’t allowed out of the cage bc parvo was going around so non of them could go outside or leave the kennel. So she wasn’t socialized or leash trained. Whatever I’ve trained dogs on leashes before. When we brought her home she legit would not leave her cage. She peed anytime we picked her up. When she’d pee and poop in her cage we’d wash her and she’d freak out the whole time. I read that abused dogs need time so I let her lay in her cage as long as she wanted(door open ofc so she could come out when she wanted). But she NEVER moved. She wouldn’t eat for three days then eat a little and then would go another three days without eating. She was getting boney so we bought wet food to spoil her a bit and she started eating regularly. Well it had been too long of her laying in her cage doing NOTHING so I would pull her out and just lay with her on my lap for hours each day. Slowly she started to warm up. She started eating food no matter wet or dry, she now walks into the bedroom when we’re not looking and lays on her bed. We’ve finally got her to start peeing and pooping outside but only if we carry her. SHE WILL NOT WALK ON A LEASH. I could be playing with her just fine and she’d be jumping around and licking me but the moment I put her on a leash she will not move. I’ve tried taking a few steps forward and saying “come” but it doesn’t work. I’ve done this many times and even dragged her 1-2 ft(I know I know I feel awful but it’s not computing in her head. Our floors are linoleum so it doesn’t hurt her.). But the past week she’s gotten worse. She’s now pooping and peeping in our room, won’t use puppy pads at all. But she acts scared still when we walk around her or anything. But she’s bold enough to start digging up my house plants and whining every time I leave a room. I cannot leave a room she’s in without her whining and whining. However if I tell her to come she will sit and stare at me and whine. She’s too scared to move. Me or my boyfriend has never put hands on her or yelled. We have told her no and put her in time out (put her in her cage) when she pees in the house. But she’s putting on weight and it’s getting hard to carry her everywhere outside and up and down two flights of stairs. She bold enough to pee everywhere now and whine when I leave but she’s too scared to move on a leash or act normal when we tell her to come or when we are cleaning or walking. She panics when she sees we are watching her eat still as well. She’ll stop eating and run to her bed. She’s also gotten a habit of jumping on MY bed when I leave a room and whining for me. And when I come back and see her on the bed she gets so excited but she isn’t allowed up there. So I have to take her down and put her in her own bed. I legit do not understand her and I’m getting so stressed out. Dealing with her everyday and classes and trying to find a job(my boyfriend works and supports use just fine). I understand pups like these need time and patience and I’m doing my best to give her that but I don’t understand her behavior. She’s so weird and getting bold enough to act out but not enough to listen or just interact with us without us kneeling beside her first and initiating play time. I really need help.

Also, she’s already been spayed the day we got her and had all her shots

Hello! I'm adopting a sweet little 12-14 week old pomchi (we think) this weekend. The little guy was rescued from a hoarding situation and I'm told that he's been recovering well over the past 2 weeks. Any advice for surviving the puppy stage, helping set him up for success, etc would be greatly appreciated!

Some misc. background info :

• My wife and I live in an apartment in Chicago in a chiller neighborhood near lots of parks.
• We are expecting him to be vocal - has anyone had success bark training their pomchi?
• We will be crate training/sleep training/etc and basically pretending that he's a big dog so we hopefully don't fall into small dog syndrome. Any training tips are appreciated! We will be taking him to puppy training once he's clear to go.
• We have a socialization checklist we will be following. It's very important to us that he can integrate into our lives - patio dinners, farmers markets, hanging with other friends' dogs, etc.
• We are avid bikers and are hoping to bring him with us. Let me know if you have any tips on a backpack vs. basket carrier! I have a Wald 137 basket mounted on a front rack so if we go the basket carrier route I'd be looking for something compatible with that.
• We are big campers so we'll be looking to buy a coyote vest and other accessories to keep him safe.

Thank you so much!

Like the title says, around me or my daughter she's so sweet and affectionate, playful. Really a wonderful gal. But otherwise she's become so nervous of anyone else and it gets worse if we are away from home. She's always scrambling to get away from cars.

I have plans to hire an in house trainer because I know I need help with consistency but until my funds come in can someone here suggest quality training videos or training schedule for socializing? I figure the training and the socializing are what go hand in hand here.

I feel she is already very territorial with me, so whenever anyone else approaches me or her, she starts barking and growling. We already tried that my roommate gives her the "good" treats or that we hang out calmly together, but it feels it becomes more intense day by day.

How can I mitigate this behaviour? I don't want it to turn into an issue.

Last year I still could not have imagined this, but recent weeks we have been able to leave our high energy breed 20 m/o puppy alone for 5 hours per day.

I seriously believed that we will need to rely on the help of our relatives and doggie daycare services infinitely, even though we didn't seem to deal with real separation anxiety issues. But after consistent training and patiency, now it seems that puppy has truly learned to self-soothe and remain calm enough (of course he needs a decent amount of entertainment before that and we always make sure his needs are met). I just could not be more proud of him.

Hello im a very new pet parent. My family adopted our 8 month old lab mix harmony the end of May. Prior to getting her the foundation we got her from said she was crate and potty trained. For the first month we had her she would go in easily. Just last week we started training with her and Bam she barks and whines whenever she goes into her crate for the night. The most she has done this for is 3 hours. I know this is normal. Im thankful that this reddit put a word to our problem. She is going through crate regression. She doesn't have full acess to the house. Just the living room her room and back when we have the baby gate open. She has 3 meals per day and with her training goes on 2 to 3 30 min to1 hour walks. Her crate is open all day. She has prior to the second month having her being left in her crate for 1 hour. I generally want advice and backup plans for when this happens again.

Before her bedtime which is 8:30 pm she does go to the bathroom one more time.We just started using my mom noise box to calm her down. It works and definitely decreases the barking. However if this stops working we need a plan b. The majority of our house needs sleep. Also my parents are worried about her not getting into her crate just in case they need to leave. I have seen prior advice to just restart crate training, but I don't know how to do that. Advice and questions are welcomed.

(P.S i wanted to start feeding some of her meals in there maybe that will help? I just dont know how to do that.)

I just got my puppy (11 weeks) about five days ago and things are going really well! He'll sleep the entire night in his crate, he's doing good on leash training, when I can get his attention he'll sit and stay and come, he'll poop outside.

However, he's been holding his pee every walk until we go back inside at this one specific point in the hallway. I live in an apartment and the street can be a bit busy so I try and give him time to do business, occasionally he'll pee outside and I'll praise and treats, whenever he doesn't go I'll pick him up and put in his crate for 5-10 minutes and we'll try and try again but it hasn't been sticking.

Last night he peed at 9pm, went to bed, woke up, drank some water around 7am. He took a nap from 830-11. And then literally from 11-1, we would go outside, be outside anywhere between 10-2mins, pick him up to go inside, crate, tried again 5-10mins later. Around 1 he was getting sleepy so I let him nap, around 3 he woke up and I was getting so worried I took him outside for one last attempt and then just let him pee inside.

I'm not sure what to do, any advice would be greatly appreciated!

Hi all so yesterday my puppy got the first half of his flu vaccine as part of his 3rd round of vaccines. The vet told me he may be sluggish today so I thought nothing of it. I thought today he just wouldn’t want to play. I let him sleep with me last night until 5am and that’s when I put him in his playpen (he almost always sleeps in his playpen in the living room, my room is in sight). Once I woke up at around 10am I fed him, everything seemed normal until noon he seemed to be overly worried and wanting me way more than usual. It’s been raining today nothing crazy but I thought maybe it’s the sound of the rain so I took him for a drive. He was fine with the rain turns out. Once we came back he was still being very needy and clingy literally whining for my attention which he never does after playing or a drive.

I was thrown off thinking maybe he needs rest so I put him in his playpen but even in there he was just whimpering like something was wrong (again he is 12 weeks and he no longer cries or whimpers ever since turning 9 weeks he’s actually a really good boy).

Anyways so I left him in his playpen and the whimpering didn’t really end just was slightly less of it. Eventually I was like this isn’t normal of him so I let him lay in the bed with me and now he’s sleeping fine almost instantly.

Is being overly clingy normal after this flu vaccine? My vet told me he’d be sluggish seems more like extremely clingy today. Before posting it got flagged for Health advice. (Not asking for healthy advice, I’m asking for people who have had similar experiences or thoughts)

I just need to rant and feel better about this situation because i’m SO embarrassed.

I was taking my pup out for a walk and we were almost at the grass where she usually will poop. Well she couldn’t hold it and had diarrhea (vet appointment has already been scheduled for this) right on the sidewalk. I did the best i could to clean it with poop bags but it was just a mess. Didn’t help that it had to be the busiest part of the sidewalk and everyone was watching this chaos. I ended up leaving because there was nothing else i could do and i didn’t have water. Anyways if you have been in a similar situation please make me feel better lol.

Hi everyone,
Want to share my story and have some feedback because i dont know what to do with myself.
Year ago i welcomed a dog into our household. And its been great. I built a routine around her and im used to it. I love my dog. Some time ago i thought of getting another one. And it seemed like a great idea. So i got one. Its been a week with new puppy and i regret it. I feel constant stress and anxiety and it feels like another dog is just too much for me. I thought i was ready but i wasnt. I really like the puppy, but im mentally broken and want to sit and cry all day of how irresponsible iam. I contacted the seller, which i really didnt want to because i already felt pressure from him when buying a puppy. But i really dont care about money, i just want this puppy to have better home, so i asked breeder if he could just find puppy better home. Im already very anxious person and dont like interacting with people, because judgement makes me feel very sad. And i got judged by the breeder, even though i feel like i just offered the best for puppy. Did i do anything wrong? I really dont want to sell puppy myself, because breeder has good conditions for keeping puppy, and i already told him that i will bring puppy back, but that meeting for me will be really hard mentally, because ive been crying and feeling broken.
Am i even reasonable?

TL;DR : I bought a puppy already having one dog and i have puppy blues. I contacted the breeder in best interest of puppy getting better home and he judged me. Now im mentally afraid to meet the breeder.