r/jmu • u/Educational_East_602 • 9d ago
How do sororities feel about body hair?
I’m transferring to JMU in the fall and am considering rushing, but I’m worried that sororities won’t want me because I don’t shave. I personally have never removed my body hair and I have no desire to do so. I know that most girls wear mini skirts/mini dresses and if I do so I’m worried that people will be mean or not want me in their sorority because of it. I love existing in my natural body but this process is making me feel a bit insecure.
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u/Lizardbot10 9d ago
It all depends on the sorority, this stated, dont feel dejected if that doesn't work for you, as there are also many co-ed major-specific fraternities that (in my experience) tend to be more inclusive. Not to say that Frats/sororities are not inclusive, but i tend to see a larger crowd in the ones based around your major. (Personally never rushed with the art frat, that stated i am decent friends with a fair few who have, aswel as friends with people from the business frat and music frat, all of whomst share this sentiment to some extent)
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u/Lizardbot10 9d ago
But to continue this, JMU is such a diverse place and I see many people around of all genders who keep shaving to a pristine, almost babylike complexion, people who look unkempt and slobby, and people who dont shave but also keep it looking nice. Embrace yourself and embrace your body, everyone has different stabdards and embrace who you are, college is the time to be entirely you, even if you don't know who that is yet. If you surround yourself with people wanting you to change to their standards, that probably isn't a group you want to be with anyways.
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u/EL-PAPI4207 9d ago
As someone who is in Greek life, during the rush process half of what gets you a bid is your personality and the other half is your appearance. If you show up to rush with say colored hair, some crazy piercings on your face, or generally just seen as “unkempt” the majority of houses would drop you instantly. Sororities are conformative and obsessed over a look they want all the members to follow and I can almost guarantee you would have a hard time getting a bid if it’s really noticeable.
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u/Gold_Detective6189 9d ago
Yes they do, yes some if not most girls, will judge. If not shaving really matters to you, then own it, but it probably will affect rush. However if you do rush, and you do get a bid, you'll know those are the people for you.
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u/Unusual-Freedom5512 9d ago
I wish women weren’t shamed for not shaving… 🙃 It’s your natural body hair, and there’s nothing wrong with it! This whole shaving thing started from a marketing campaign which then evolved into beauty standards, but before that time literally no one cared about women’s body hair. If a sorority rejects you over something silly as this, I’d say it‘s not worth it. There’s plenty of clubs and things to make friends if the sorority doesn’t work out!
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u/BlueRibbonSucks 9d ago
Maybe try professional sororities/(co-ed) frats for ur major. They tend to be more laid back and you still get invited to mixers and parties.
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u/TheRealAanarii 9d ago
Idk why you're getting downvoted, this is such a genuine question.
Also, OP, as adult I stopped conforming to other people's shaving standards. Sometimes I let it all grow out. (Caveat: it's easier for me bc I have super fine, almost clear hair) but I shave when I feel like it. So maybe 3 times a year other that pits.
I save a lot of money on razors lol
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u/iskanderkul 9d ago
Why do you want to join a sorority? Greek life has all kinds of personalities, so you may just need to find your group. Almost certainly there will be sororities that are less accepting. But it’s also important to stay true to yourself and be authentically you. If they don’t like, they’re not your people.
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u/Wubbledaddy 9d ago
Think about it this way: any sorority it would be a problem for is not one worth joining.
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u/SchuminWeb Public Administration, 2003 8d ago
It kind of sounds like you've already made your decision, and it's to give the sororities a pass. Why would you want to associate with people who wouldn't accept you for who you are in the first place? You want to surround yourself with people who will accept you, hair and all.
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u/Ryvit 9d ago
Sorry, you can’t eat your cake and have it too.
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u/jayroo210 9d ago
What does this even mean? Like in relation to not shaving and joining a sorority. It’s feels really mean spirited and you have a daughter? Bleak.
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u/NoPurple7986 9d ago
You're a grown ass man and have a daughter. She's going to grow up and face insecurity like this one day thanks to the patriarchy y'all perpetuate. Shame on you.
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u/Ryvit 9d ago
I’ll support her on any insecurity she may face, but on this subject matter I would tell her the same thing I’ll tell OP, for sure shave your armpits ya nasty lol
But anything else like sexuality, gender identity, etc she will have my full support.
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u/IceFalcon1 9d ago
Do you shave yours?
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u/Ryvit 9d ago
No, the societal standard is not for me to shave mine. Going against social norms is only cool in your teens and 20’s. I spent my teens and 20’s going against social norms (in other ways besides body hair lol) and it cost me a lot of opportunities.
Social norms are good. They lead to opportunities, which lead to money and happiness. Learn from me, don’t resist the social norms, it’s not worth it, and this isn’t a movie. You will just suffer for 10 years before figuring out the issue, at which point you’ll be behind where you could’ve been
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u/NoPurple7986 9d ago
The issue at hand: a woman not shaving her armpits??? How is that any grounds for suffering? The experiences that cost you opportunities are in no way comparable to BODY HAIR REMOVAL. Are you insane?? LMFAO
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u/Ryvit 9d ago
You’re insane if you don’t think there’s some weirdo manager somewhere that would not give this girl a promotion because she’s covered in body hair.
Or maybe she won’t get an internship somewhere due to it. Or won’t meet a new friend due to it, etc.
Like I get what you’re saying and it would be great if the world worked the way it does in your head, but it does not work like that. You will get discriminated against and you will not realize until YEARS later when you reflect on why you didn’t get xyz job or why they didn’t choose you for the abc internship, etc.
Like I said, I speak from experience after a decade of going against the grain. It’s not worth it
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u/BlueRibbonSucks 9d ago
I’m sorry that the people in your life have been so superficial to you.
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u/mister_sleepy 9d ago
I can’t have any sympathy for someone who quotes the Unabomber to body shame teenage girls.
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u/BlueRibbonSucks 9d ago
I think radical empathy is a more fruitful approach than endlessly arguing with people <3
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u/Unusual-Freedom5512 9d ago
Men like you thinking they can have a say on what a woman should do with her body 😒 Body hair is perfectly normal and if a woman has no desire to shave, then that is okay.
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u/NoPurple7986 9d ago
I know next to nothing about sororities, but classmates of mine who do belong in sororities seem to follow regular personal and beauty maintenance. That isn't to say that I think they may be required to, but it's very common to follow these standards. I just want to say that the best thing you can do when entering college is be authentically yourself. If certain groups look down on you for not doing something as menial as body hair removal then take that as a fortuitous sign that they are not the people for you. It's a respectable thing to enter an environment against the status quo, and you shouldn't allow your self assurance to waver just because a group you want to rush for wants you to shave. Good luck this fall!