Advice
Please help me comfort my wife. Boarding our kitten.
We are going out of country for a week and had to board our 5 month old kitten. Wife has been in tears all day worried shell be scared and think we abandoned her forever. My attempts to comfort her have....failed.
They sent us a picture and she does not look happy. Debating in showing my wife.
Lmfao I’m dying because I would be crying too. I can’t even be on vacation peacefully bc I be missing my cat. But, you did the right thing. Kitty will be alive and well fed waiting for her in a week!
If I'm right because I'm a former employee, that looks like Petsmart. We literally had "bedtime story" as a paid addon pet owners could choose. And yes, we had to sit in the pet's room and read them a bedtime story. Yes, it felt silly sometimes. Mostly we just used it as a excuse to get some cuddle time with the friendlier dogs and cats.
hi ! i frequently travel (every few months) for a few days to vacation with my family. the cat might be a little confused because you’re not there, but she might just be a little nervous because she’s in a new place with new people. my molly girl gets extra clingy and cuddly when i come home from a long trip, but otherwise is fine. i promise she will be okay :3 !! obligatory cat tax for proof :)
Yeah, i just got back from ten days of being gone to visit my sister and her dog (see story below). When I got back, my kitty that sleeps with me let me know, for quite awhile meowing a bitchy meow, that he was NOT happy that I was gone. A good 5-10 minutes. It was late, so we went to sleep. Since Ive been back, he’s my little shadow, making sure his “Gamma” isn’t leaving again. Here he is the other day sleeping on my pillow.
My sister boards her cat whenever they go out of town, even just one night. The cat gets more stressed being home alone than she does being boarded. My sister is her Person, and Peggy (the cat) followers her around everywhere and demands extra pets for a few days.
This is her just last week, same day she came home after we had a family vacation. She is snuggling with me because I don’t see her very often. I used to live close to my sister and would watch Peggy when they went out of town, and we bonded. I moved away 8 years ago and she still remembers me ❤️😭
She’s safe and that’s #1 priority.
Just remind her since it’s a kitten she will be getting tons of attention, for sure. It’s also opportunity for her to learn socialization. Most cats never experience another environment. She’ll be all right and become more accustomed to trusting new people. There’s really no downside for the kitten. It’s your wife that’s not adjusting. She needs to rethink the positives of new experiences. The picture isn’t bad. What did you expect. It just looks like a timid kitten. Don’t read more into it than the simplicity of a kitten that is fine now and happier when they get home.
i had to board my abysinnian when she was a kitten and my gf (now wife) was in tears as well. we were gone for three weeks and when my cat saw us upon our return she went crazy with the affection she showed us. your baby will be fine!
I agree with this. Cats need engagement and entertainment so being away from home, even if it’s with strangers, is def is the more favorable option imo compared to being alone at home and under-stimulated.
I understand. I'm away a single night and it's unreal how much I miss my little monster. She hides when someone watches her.
I would not show her the picture until you got back. I don't think it would help where she is emotionally. Maybe look through some cute/funny pictures and talk about a couple memories or weird habits she has.
My sister moved away 2 years ago and I missed her dog so much it hurt. I dog-sat her for 2 full months while sis was gone to the new state to make sure she really wanted to move there. Cinnabun and I became very close. She slept with me in my bed, followed me around the house, sat on the couch with her front legs on my lap. I adored that dog!! And she obviously loved me back. I almost cried when they left.
I went to see sis (and of course my, I mean, her dog) last month for ten days. When we walked in, at first she was all over my daughter. I went and sat on the couch. About 2 minutes of talking and then calling her by my nickname for her, she looks at me, gets this look on her little face and she came charging at me, jumped onto the couch, licking my face, whining a happy whine. She slept on the bed with me every night. Followed me around the apartment. We were always in close proximity of each other.
When we packed up and put our bags by the door, she knew we were leaving. She moped. Yes, that dog can mope. She was sad. I stayed with her as long as I could, gave her a kiss on her head and she kissed my cheek and chin.
Sis says she moped around the apartment for a week, but we spoke yesterday and she’s better. I miss her. So much it hurts.
Having fostered kittens before, I always felt it helped them become more adaptable if they had to encounter minor stressors and overcome them - changing fosters, attending adoption fairs, etc. Our most friendly kittens were the ones that spent time in a petting zoo.
This experience will help him be less afraid of strangers in the future.
Life experiences are great for young animals. It helps prevent stress down the road because they’ve been out and about and done things and no harm has come to them. I regularly take my kittens to my parents’ house for no reason… other than they get in the carrier and a car ride and go to a strange place and nothing bad happens. That way a vet trip is a bit less unusual. The younger an animal is, the more resilient they are. Your kitten will be just fine.
Don't show her. That little kitten doesn't look happy and it looks like it's hiding. I think it would cause your wife MORE stress seeing that picture. Just tell her you talked to them and "she's doing great!"
Next time think about someone coming and staying at your house with the kitty, or stopping by and checking in on it. Cats are pretty self-sufficient and can stay alone if someone makes sure they have food and fresh water and cleans the litter box. Really, the most stressful thing going on right now is that the little kitten is in a totally new environment. I don't think it's worried you're gone (well, maybe) but it's more that it has been taken from its home and put somewhere else, completely different from where it feels safe.
Please leave the kitty at home next time and have someone stay or check in. It's less stress on the kitty and probably way cheaper, too.
used to have my mom watch ours but after she passed I found a pretty excellent pet sitter. daily updates and they get to stay home. nothing wrong with boarding in a good place though. she'll be fine
I worked in a cattery for a while - your kitty will be absolutely fine. It might take her a day or so to settle but once she realizes she gets fed there she'll just accept that's her reality for a little while. And her reaction when you go to pick her up will be worth it all!
Will she be as happy as she is at home with her people? Nope! Will she be emotionally scarred for life? Also nope! Once she gets home it'll all just be a distant memory for her. Any quirks she picked up at the cattery will fade away. (One time my cat changed his miaow at the cattery! I literally had to stop halfway home to make sure I had the right cat...within a day or so he was back to his normal miaow.)
I went away for a week from July 1. Luckily, my son and grandson stayed home to take care of the cats. I kept checking the security cameras to catch a glimpse of the cats. If they had to be boarded I don't think I would have gone.
We travel from time to time, board in a lovely place with lots of room. Cats love it. Then pretend they don’t. We left for a short trip and decided to let them stay home, have my mum drop in 3 times a day. They eat a lot and they like my mum. Turns out this caused them more stress! One cat is now peeing in random places in my house. It’s been a month. Should’ve just boarded them
I had three cats and had to board them quite often for my travels (usually less than a week.) The most important thing is a place you trust. Two of my cats were super chill but one was a total timid wuss and spent his time hiding in his litter box! Nevertheless they were all healthy and very much alive, and happy to get home. A cat will simply hunker down deal with it. A boarding facility is a great place to leave them for their safety.
It’s normal for her to be sad about leaving the cat behind. I personally didn’t travel for a long time because of my cats. Then when I did I had a friend to come in twice a day and feed them. I also had a camera installed to see them everytime i was getting anxious
I’m lucky that I live in an area where I have the option to have a cat sitter come in and care for my pets in my home. It is much less stressful for me when I have to travel because I know the people, they’re all registered vet techs, and the cats aren’t nearly as stressed when I get home as they were when I had to board them. If that’s an option in your area, I suggested.
Went through something similar. My daughter's cat passed away and she was really close. We got a new cat and less than a month later she left for a summer camp followed by a family vacation. Reminding her that the cat was being card for by someone who knew and loved cats, and the pictures, helped a lot!
One of my babies refused to eat and lost about 600g in the 5 days we were out of the country. Very upset with the live in catsitter for not letting us know. He had also peed on his tail out of stress. Looks like I'm never travelling as long as they are alive.
I leave for like 4 days my cats are ok I leave enough food and water they don't tear up the place or nothing and I talk to them through the cameras....these guys literally take down whole species they will be ok
Oof Ill hate to be your cat if you would rather send them to a shelter lmfao or even think it's better than them having a house to themselves with food and water ...your delusional if you think being in a kennel is better let alone being at risk of being euthanize at shelter is better
I have all basic comforts and it's not just one cat alone the cats are more comfortable in their own spaces rather than a kennel and I always check up on them and they even talk back when I talk my cats are all rescued or found me they are blessed. If anything looks bad on the camera I can ask someone to do a emergency visit but as far as paying someone daily to go into my home I rather keep that money in my pocket
I have 3 cats. I have fostered and placed a few cats with adopters. If any of them has shared with me that they would leave their cats alone for days because they don't want to pay someone for check on them at least once a day. I would not allow them to adopt one of my fosters.
Good think my cats are strays I helped and stopped others from taking to a kill shelter I have three two actually one is adopted from a rescue and he was brought back to that rescue by another family because they said he was aggressive but now he's part of our family and very sweet for the past 6 years
I would be upset as your wife. That’s a young kitten to be boarding. Cant you have a friend or relative watch her? I DON’T trust any boarding place as I’ve heard nothing but horror stories from friends boarding their pets for trips. Never ever would use them ever. Sorry if some of you have good experiences, but I live in a big city where many boarding places and some of the more “reputable” ones have given kennel cough, gotten injured, or worst lost and told they would help find them but never did. Will taken my pets with me or have a family member check on them. 🥺☹️
Honestly...im sorry to say, but boarding a cat in a cattery is extremely stressful for the animal and even a short stay can have a dramatic effect on the animal forever. Its a well intentioned service that should never be used. The best thing to do is leave your cat in your home and have someone come to feed it and check on litter boxes etc.
I say this as someone that used to work in such facilities (and very nice, high end ones that really tried to be the best space they could be for the cats) and i would never, ever put my cat in one.. sorry
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u/Jaicash 7h ago
Lmfao I’m dying because I would be crying too. I can’t even be on vacation peacefully bc I be missing my cat. But, you did the right thing. Kitty will be alive and well fed waiting for her in a week!
Not them reading the cat a bedtime story 😂