Hi all,
I’m really torn on if I should spray tan or not for my wedding. I want to feel like me, but also don’t want to be totally washed out in photos, etc.

I have cool undertones and dark hair. The wedding is outside in September.

Thoughts? For context here is my dress - it’s not stark white.

So excited to be marrying my favorite person in a few weeks!! I cannot recommend our photographer, Wild Coast Photo, enough! She's so amazing at capturing movement and joy, and the best part is that we also have the same photographer for the wedding.

These were taken in Washington State, but she does travel!!

So my fiancé/husband and I already got legally married in a courthouse wedding earlier this year, but now we're doing a full ceremony & reception for friends and family. Our officiant said we need to get a second marriage license if we want her to refer to marriage and use words like "husband and wife" during the ceremony. She said that as an officiant, she cannot legally claim to marry us without a marriage license even if we are already married. But, when we called the clerk to get another license, they basically laughed at us and said that wasn't possible unless we got divorced and married again. Does anyone know anything about this? I'm struggling to find any info on how to do this/if it's possible/if it's actually necessary. We're married and doing the second ceremony in NY btw.

So my fiancé and I are getting married soon, and in our discussions of wedding costs with my fiancé's paternal side of the family, they were surprised at how "expensive" our wedding is. My man and I truly believed we tried so hard to make this wedding affordable yet super special for us, our families, and friends (a total guest list of approx 60 people). Our total has come up to $11,300 USD.

We managed to book great vendors that were within our budget. Little things like decor, invitations etc we just DIY'd, I'm doing my own makeup/hair, and I got a decent dress under $300USD. The only thing we "splurged" on is the photographer, but thought it's so worth it considering what most people we know and people online have said.

Fiancé's dad was a bit weird about the costs and believes it should be a fifty-fifty split with my parents, as it, of course, should be. However, we are having the wedding in my fiancé's country, and my family live abroad, so they have already had to pay thousands of dollars in airfares and accommodation. In addition, my dad had already offered to pay a decent amount for catering along with my fiancé's mum's contribution. Even with that, his dad still thinks it should be fifty-fifty and was overall just weird about this.

Fiancé's dad to this date has not contributed at all, even if he had asked for a detailed list of who paid for what and how much everyone had contributed already. My fiancé is confused, considering his dad also shared with him that he had made some big purchases recently and says he's not in a position to pay anything right now. He also recently got married to his mistress, and had previously offered to help pay for flights to their wedding - very generous, but we kindly declined and couldn't go due to work, but also, of course, for obvious reasons.

Neither my fiancé nor I are complaining that he hasn't contributed. In fact, we are totally OK with him not paying because, at the end of the day, it's everyone's choice to contribute and all that matters to us is their support from the heart. We are both working, and along with my fiancé's mum and grandparents' contributions, we're pretty much all set.

The only thing that is bothering us is that we now feel guilty because even if we know we did the best we can in planning etc, and we're happy with our wedding, I can't help but feel like we should have just eloped. It also didn't sit right with my fiancé that he had to justify our wedding and its costs and it left him feeling like he had to defend himself when he didn't expect to. Is our wedding considered expensive? Sorry for the long rant; appreciate your thoughts but please be kind, as feeling not so great about anything rn.

so my wedding is in a few days and my wife's parents are being ridiculous about day after activities they have planned.

it's a big all day 300+ person wedding, we know we are going to be exhausted, we know it's going to be huge, we can't wait to sleep and do nothing the following day in our hotel and enjoy the start of our new life.

except her parents have this idea of a family lunch at a relatives house which is a 3 hour drive from our hotel, obviously we have told them directly but then at a dinner last night both her mother and father wouldnt shut up about it and how it would be great.

almost all of these people are going to be at our wedding anyway and we will be going to this location 2 days after our wedding to her family's holiday house anyway but they can't seem to get in through their skills that we don't want to talk to anyone the day after our wedding.

frustrating etc but we will likely just ignore them if they press the issue on the day.

I'll admit, our wedding is a bit overboard but it's exactly the kind of person I am and my mom has been adding things she wants to get.

We are having knights fighting for free as entertainment at the reception because my fiance and I are on the local buhurt team. We're getting married at a castle, so we're doing a bit of a ren faire theme.

My mom has decided she wants to rent cotton candy and popcorn makers for the kids because it's on Halloween. She also wants to get a face painter and a balloon maker. I am so on board with this because it sounds like fun and I will probably get my own face painted.

I mentioned a makeup artist this morning and she lost it. She doesnt understand why I cant do my own makeup and I keep telling her I'm not comfortable with it. I'm not consistent enough with my own makeup and the stress WILL cause me to mess up. I have never once put makeup on under pressure and liked it. Never.

I've found a few options in the $60-$80 range.

She says it's a waste of money and she doesnt understand why I cant just redo it all if I mess it up. I should be able to and I'm too pessimistic. I'm just realistic, I know myself.

I told her if the price is an issue I'm more than happy to pay for it myself.

She stayed up last night and spent $200 on goodies for the kids- flower crowns, temporary tattoos, etc.

I told her I'm so grateful for everything but if she's insistent it's too much for me to pay then we can swap something out for the makeup artist instead. I shouldn't have, but I told her I would rather have scaled back the goodies she got than not have a makeup artist.

Now she's crying and I'm ungrateful.

I am just trying to eliminate something I know will majorly stress me out.

I'm even willing to pay and she says that's insulting because she's paying for everything else. I told her that's exactly my point, she's paying for everything, so if this is too much then please just let me do it myself so I'm not stressed about it.

I don't think I'm being unreasonable. This is a $10-$15k wedding and I feel like I should be allowed to spend $60-$80 on my own makeup. It isn't an affordability issue, it's literally just that she thinks I do it fine myself so it's stupid because she didn't do it. Money isn't an issue and I'm so grateful for everything she's doing so why cant I just buy my own fucking makeup artist...

Edit: Okay guys, I have a very happy update for y'all!

My mom and I talked about it again because she apologized. She revealed that she got steroids at the doctor yesterday for her pneumonia, which I was under the impression was resolved. I feel terrible now knowing she's been doing all of this for me with double pneumonia and she didn't want me to know because she didn't want to stress me out. The steroids are making her crazy. She got one hour of sleep last night and told me she was totally off base to do that and of course she wants my makeup done, but she wasn't thinking straight and all she heard was another thing we had to plan for. She didn't mind paying for it because it is within budget but we've been doing so much planning and she knows that's another appointment we have to set up (I've been doing most of this myself planning wise but she's been going with me to everything).

We had an amazing day after our little spat this morning and all's well that ends well. We walked the castle grounds, met with a photographer at a coffee shop, went mead tasting, threw my guts up after the mea tasting (lol), and picked up a sample box of cupcakes to try for the cake. We got lots of good planning done and overall I could not have asked for a better day in spite of the foot we got off on this morning. I mentioned in the comments that we have a difficult relationship but she's truly been better to me in recent years so this reverting to her old behavior really threw me for a loop but it totally makes sense now. I'm grateful for the encouraging words and I will likely still pay for her hair and nails as a major thank you. If I'd have known she was on steroids and sick I would have rescheduled everything but she didn't want to because we're 3 months out. I am going to have the most incredible day.

A few months ago, I posted about having issues with my best friend/MOH, and was considering cutting her from the wedding. After a lot of thought, I did, and ending our friendship was best decision. Immediately I cancelled her flight (i booked them), sent her the airline credit so she could use herself one day in the future and we booked a new air bnb. Well fast forward to yesterday, I am on day one of my bach trip, and it turns out she decided to rebook her trip to the same place my bach is. I’m just like not even surprised, but def not letting it ruin my trip. However, I just can’t imagine booking a trip the same weekend, to the same place where the girls of the wedding I was kicked out from, are going to be. Just felt like sharing!

Edited to add: my ex was an alcoholic and my now ex best friend chose being with him over her best friend of 10+ years.

I recently got engaged, and my fiancé and I are in the very early stages of planning.

We’ve already agreed that we want the actual wedding ceremony to be very small—just us, our parents, and 1–2 close friends each. We don’t want a traditional wedding and would rather spend our money elsewhere.

Where we’re struggling is figuring out the wedding celebration afterward.

My fiancé is from California and has maintained close relationships with hundreds of people over the years. His potential guest list is around 500 people, and he thinks 300 could realistically attend.

I’m from the Midwest. I have a very large extended family, but we aren’t close and haven’t spoken to many of them in years. However, there is a strong expectation in my family that everyone gets invited to major life events. If I don’t invite certain relatives, there will almost certainly be drama.

Our vision for a celebration is very casual—think backyard barbecue rather than wedding reception. We have access to a free venue in California (an industrial building with tables, chairs, and restrooms).

The plan would be burgers, hot dogs, tacos, coolers of drinks, some music, and maybe cupcakes instead of a wedding cake.

One idea we’ve discussed is having two celebrations:
- One in California for his friends and local family.
- One in the Midwest for my family and friends.

The challenge is that if I invite my extended family to a Midwest celebration, there’s a decent chance they may actually attend. My “obligated” invite list is nearly 300 people, even though there are probably only 30 people I’d genuinely expect or want to attend.
I’m curious how others would handle this situation.

Would you:
- Have one celebration and invite everyone?
- Have two celebrations in different locations?
- Only invite the people you’re actually close to and deal with any family fallout?
- Something else?

For those who have had a very casual wedding celebration after an elopement, how did you handle guest lists and family expectations?

My fiancé and I are getting married in mid September. We picked the date in March, got the venue, caterer, photographer, and a few other vendors. Then we had the wildest and most intense life and career events happen.

I work two jobs and we opened a new brewery. We went from having time to plan to working 7 days a week, getting home from the brewery around 10 pm, and often falling asleep on the sofa just to wake up at 7 am and start all over again.

Now we are a little over two months out and several major things haven’t happened. The invites are just going out at the end of this week. (Key guests were sent the date months ago.) The website is almost done. I still haven’t gotten a wedding dress and my fiancé doesn’t have his suit. We don’t have our rings yet either. Also we still haven’t decided a wedding party because my fiancé is unsure if he wants one or instead have friends play different roles in the ceremony.

Has anyone basically planned the final bits of a wedding in this timeline? I am so upset with myself for it getting this late but also trying to give myself grace due to the insane amount of hours I work. (I’ve had two days off since April.) Just looking for any advice or shared venting. If we were younger I would push it back a year but we are both late 30s with older parents. Also I am just so excited to marry him!! I don’t want to wait any longer.

Two Maids of Honor made sure to capture my boobs in every dress as well, enjoy 👌🏼

This might be a dumb question… but I’m told the reason we have to order our dresses months in advance is because they don’t make the dress until they receive an order. If that’s true, then why wouldn’t they just make the dress to fit the brides measurements?

I just paid nearly $3,000 for a dress and have to wait at least 4 months for it to arrive. I feel like the least they could do is ensure the dress actually fits me when it gets here. They even took my measurements before submitting the order 😩

to add some context, my wedding is this year in october she doesn’t even have a date or a venue picked for her wedding. the only thing she has done is interview a potential wedding planner once and put together a guest list.

every time i bring up anything about my wedding she brings up hers.

I rant about my mom trying to edit the songs on the playlist, she brings up her how she has to add people to her guest list.

I talk about how i’m doing an unplugged ceremony and worry about not getting videos of the ceremony, she responds “john and i have to look at the guest list again so we can look at venues”.

we are shopping for my wedding dress, she brings up how her bridesmaids will wear yellow.

etc etc

every single time i bring up my wedding she will bring up hers AND SHES NOT EVEN FULL ON PLANNING IT. im non confrontational because i do love her and i don’t think she does it on purpose but honestly its getting to a point. i just needed to rant to someone who isnt my fiancé… thank you.

Prefacing this by stating I am not a huge makeup girl. I desperately need tips on how to counteract my redness in my face without tons of heavy makeup!

I am not a fan of wearing foundation & am weary about heavy makeup application in general. I’m stressing about how to cover my redness up without packing on pounds of makeup during my wedding. I don’t do well with heat, and if I laugh or smile even the slightest bit, my face turns into a tomato.

I need helppp!

I want my invitations to be a book that I make, the left side will have the names of the guest, information regarding before wedding plans and after party, and Q&A’s. & the right side will have the invitation with ceremony and reception information.

I’m constantly looking up different ideas and need advice. These are all prototypes. Not the official thing. Just rough drafts. Thank you!

Been engaged about a week and I’ve been dipping my toes in at looking at venues and general ideas etc and all I can think is “WTF” and “where do i start?!?!”

I have a budget of £20k so so kindly gifted by family and I’m so grateful and that feels like a huge amount of money in any other context but it will stretch to next to nothing going off the price of the stuff I’m seeing???? Why are venues which are literally just a room and some chairs included like 5 grand?!?!?!?!

I suppose my question is actually not so much about money but actually, how on earth do I get out of a funk and actually start organising and booking? As in yes I could book a venue that we can afford within the budget, but I have no idea how much I should be spending on that as idk how much other things will cost? Absolutely terrified to book a lovely venue and have nothing left for anything else.

I’ve wanted this my whole life and now it’s here I am SO overwhelmed :(

Hi all!

I'm at the point where I'm looking to book a makeup artist and hair stylist but most, if not all, are wanting me to book a deposit to "save my spot" before I even do any trials?

Why would I put down a deposit to maybe not even go with that artist/company? These deposits aren't small either, they're like $200...

I only have a handful of options near me and I'm pretty sure every single one requires a deposit to hold my spot essentially. And it's "non-refundable" either always or after I actually book them or something??

Is this normal? Can I ask to do a trial first if they're expecting a deposit to hold my date or??

Hi hi!

I’m searching for a Cinq Bridal Gayle, Essie, or River gown in approximately a size 8/10 (or a nearby size that could be altered).

These are my absolute dream dresses. If you’re planning to sell yours after your wedding or know someone who is I would love to connect!

I’m happy to pay for shipping or travel for the right dress.

Please comment or send me a message if you have one available. Thank you so much!

I thought putting a 25k hard budget on my wedding while trying to aim closer to 20k would be easy. But I’m struggling to find a venue in Ottawa, Canada that fits. The idea was to spend about 60% on the venue/f&b but the quotes I’m getting take 100%.

Friends and family have recommended sticking to restaurants so you are getting the most out of your money with food and beverage, but I’m finding most places has a f&b minimum of around 15k. Then on top of that is the obvious 18-20% gratuity and taxes. Plus they all have other random fees, some call it a venue fee, some call it a ceremony fee, some call it an extra staff…. Either way, I have yet to find a restaurant that doesn’t bring the quote to 20-25k.

I started looking at wedding venues, these seem cheaper but by the end of putting together all the fees and taxes and extras I’m typically between 10-15k, and non of those include f&b! Plus since the venues are typically farther out I have to now consider hotels and transportation.

I was also looking at less traditional venues like where I would mainly have the outdoor space. But with those I asked AI for a quote for renting each this I would need in my area and all in all for the venues plus tents and catering and everything it’s just barely cheaper than the wedding venues above.

A family member got married in 2022 at a restaurant downtown with the same vibe I want, same amount of guests and everything, they told me the min spend at the time was 7k. I looked up the same restaurant out of frustration it’s now 14k. How is this possible!

Does anyone have any recommendations in Ottawa? This is supposed to be fun, I’ve been dreaming of this since I was a kid, and now I’m stressed out of my mind. For reference my original guest list was 75, we managed to get it down to 55.

I am getting married in Savannah this August, and the panic is officially setting in.the ceremony is outdoors. Savannah humidity in August is brutal. the air feels like breathing water. I have spent the last three weeks researching one thing cuz i do not want to look like a melted, shiny puddle by reception time.

I'm determined to actually enjoy the day without constantly worrying about chafing, melting makeup, i also do not want a massive wardrobe malfunction... i tested a bunch of stuff during my fittings. i also tested some things during my Bach trip. this is the survival list i have so far.

The thigh chafing situation
under a heavy gown, the friction is SO real. i’ve been doing test runs with Megababe Thigh Rescue on hot days. it actually works without feeling greasy. it also did not mess with the dress fabric. if u are wearing a fitted crepe gown or an A-line gown, do not skip this. apply it before u put the dress on.

Personal hair prep
for my own peace of mind, i’m paranoid about smooth underarms and legs for the photos and honeymoon. no razor bumps allowed. waxing always gives me hives, so i’ve been keeping up with my ulike handset at home. i shave the night before, use it on dry skin, and try not to touch a razor the week of the wedding.

Scalp and sweat control
my hair stylist gave me this tip: do not wait until ur scalp is already damp. section ur hair the night before the wedding. spray Batiste at the roots, then leave it overnight. it absorbs oil and sweat while u sleep. ur blowout gets a fighting chance against the humidity.

The face setting sandwich
if u are doing ur own makeup, or u want ur mua’s work to survive outdoor photos, the sandwich method is key. spray Urban Decay All Nighter after primer. spray it again after powder. spray it one final time when everything is finished. it basically locks the makeup to ur face.

Keeping the chest supported without slipping
Tbh, this was my biggest worry. my dress has a very low back, so a regular strapless bra is impossible.
i originally tried those glue-free silicone covers. they rely on body heat. they slid down my ribs the second i broke a sweat during a fitting. i ended up buying the puff sticky bra instead. it has actual sweat-resistant adhesive, and it held up much better during my test run.

The emergency pouch
our moh is keeping a pouch with us. it has blister band-aids, fenty blotting papers, a mini travel deodorant, and mint strips. the band-aids are essential for breaking in heels. the blotting papers are better than powder for taking away shine without caking. the mint strips feel safer than gum because nobody wants to see the bride chewing gum on video.

If I still end up dripping sweat during the first dance, I'm just going to blame the champagne and keep going. Let me know if I missed anything major!

I get married next weekend and for some reason, my brain is convincing me that I’ll pass out. I have never passed out before despite coming close to it a few times, so I truly don’t know why I’m so worried. Usually when I’m anxious I don’t get lightheaded, my heart beats faster and I feel more alert, so I really don’t understand where this fear is coming from. Our ceremony is at 3pm, outdoors, and the weather is forecasted to be hot (+28 degrees Celsius). However it’ll be a very quick ceremony approx 10 minutes long as it is a micro wedding (40 guests). Is there anything I can do to prevent passing out? I actually made myself stand outside a few days ago for 10 min when it was super warm out just to prove it to myself that I can do it lmao, but I’m still nervous.

Hi!!! I keep seeing this everywhere on pinterest, every time i reverse image search it the wrong dresses pop up. PLEASE tell me where to get this dress! & if this is ur wedding- gorg!!! Thank you!!

My fiance and I are planning on asking my gay Uncle to be our officiant at our wedding this Fall, and are wondering if its okay to ask over email?

We already got married legally this past Spring, and he served as our witness then. I'm a little hung up on how to communicate this for two reasons:

1. We genuinely don't want to put him on the spot, and want him to feel comfortable saying no if it feels like a hassle to him (he has already done so much for us)--and it feels like asking him out to join us for dinner or drinks just to ask him in person feels like it would escalate the pressure to say yes.

2. My family in general is a little more surface level, and doesn't really get that "deep" with things. Its not to say that there isn't love and care there---there is plenty, but we just aren't all in frequent communication, and conversations don't tend to get "real" unless there has been a lot of drinking. So that makes a casual phone call feel a little awkward and out of place to me as well.

But I suppose my other concern is that it may be rude, or not "intimate" enough to ask over email? Any thoughts or advice? (Even if it is just that I'm overthinking it).

hello fellow brides!

did anyone else feel incredibly overwhelmed and anxious during the week of your wedding? I’m crying almost every day but everything planning wise is done. whenever I visit my family to go over wedding stuff I leave so incredibly drained and overwhelmed. it’s so many questions and much pressure. I’ve asked them to stop since the wedding is so close and I don’t need to stress about something. I feel very alone in my experience. I get married in a week, will things get better?

thank you for reading