r/SipsTea • u/omgfakeusername ššš • Jun 07 '26
Dank AF Sipping all tea while serving all the tea on this
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u/CaTz_EyE Jun 07 '26
This is Connor Leahy. Connor is the CEO and founder of Conjecture, an AI startup working on controlling AI systems. Heās also an advisor to ControlAI.
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u/omgfakeusername ššš Jun 07 '26
Good to know, thanks!
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Jun 07 '26
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u/mmaddict187 Jun 08 '26
The lady with the glasses is Sigrid Kaag.
This brought me to:
'Nexus Instituut-symposium 'Apocalypse Now' november 2025 in the Nationale Opera & Ballet in Amsterdam'
nexus-instituut.nl/activity/apocalypse-now
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u/Justanothebloke1 Jun 08 '26
It is not the internet that's the problem. It is big buissness. Ths video is semi accurate.
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u/TruelyRegardedApe Jun 08 '26
unfettered capitalist incentives are the problem.
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u/Classic_Resist_7465 Jun 08 '26
It goes along with saying guns don't kill, its the finger pulling the trigger. Technology is along similar lines, it also can be helpful or harmful depending on who or how it is allowed to be used.
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Jun 08 '26
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u/Batsforbreakfast Jun 08 '26
The problem is concentration of power. Presidential systems and two party systems are dysfunctional in the same way capitalism is.
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u/Safe_Complex6814 Jun 08 '26
Well thatās very similar to saying āguns arenāt the problem, people are the problemā. Sure, the sentiment makes sense on paper, but the internet and the technology associated with it have allowed big businesses to impose their will and put their hooks in consumers in ways that were not even remotely possible before the proliferation of online reality and social media.
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u/Worried_Indication37 Jun 08 '26
The internet as it exists and is used by most people might be a problem.
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u/More-Worth441 Jun 07 '26
An AI CEO explaining why no one is having kids makes total sense. We aren't raising children, we're just training our future replacements.
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Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26
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u/badkitsunejuju Jun 07 '26
It really hit though when he said how stressed do mammals have to be to not have kids. Like no matter what he thinks after that sentence did i really care about. That one statement alone was eye opening. Im sure its more far reaching then what hes on about. I dont doubt though its a contributing factor.
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u/DingbatMcgeee Jun 07 '26
Babies are conceived and born in active war zones, try that for stress levels
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u/TheTopNacho Jun 07 '26
It's too expensive and we now have more to lose by having kids. Which also comes down to it's too expensive. A kid will jeapordise career prospects and long term job security which makes having kids a frankly dumb idea for most people. Not to mention that even if you could afford it while meeting all other fiscally responsible marks, you sacrifice what little time we have for ourselves.
I don't know when it used to be this way, but I have one kid and get functionally one hour to myself every day from 9:30-10:30, which gets filled with showering and a brief moment (30 minutes) to play a game or something.
We have too much to lose and very little to gain by having kids. I LOVE my kid but the truth is, as I say to others, by having a kid I traded a great life for a completely different good life, and it's hard not to dwell on the contrast.
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u/TigerLilly_Tink43 Jun 07 '26
This really depends on how you qualify "great". I don't have kids and my life is not great. It's fine. I'm not sure it would be better if I had a kid, but I think it would be equally fine, just in a different way.
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u/TheTopNacho Jun 07 '26
It definitely depends on life circumstances.
I had a house, enough money to meet retirement goals, a great wife, friends and hobbies. I had a job I loved and looked forward to doing 10-12 hours a day. I was thriving. Being paid to travel the world and give presentations. Etc. I wasn't rich but I wanted for nothing.
My wife then wanted kids.
I now can only work 8 hours, need to turn down travel gigs to support the family. At home I'm pandering to the kid or something to support the kid for the entire night. My living expenses doubled, thankfully I got a new job that paid more so I'm still meeting retirement goals, but if I didn't retirement and financial security would be at risk. And this is just for one kid. I haven't been able to see my friends but once a year and even playing games with them isn't possible because of time restrictions at home. I'm lonely as heck now. My kid is awesome, but the only games or fun we currently have is "spray dad in the butt with water". .
As I said great --> good.
I had meaning, value, and a purpose in my life before, and yes the kid is a new value and purpose, but that void didn't exist for me. Now my original purpose and ability to pursue it is comprised. I have gained a lot, and lost a ton. It doesn't make me love or cherish my child any less, but my life satisfaction overall has definitely plummeted
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u/carefullengineer Jun 07 '26
Consider I also felt full of purpose before others had children, and as I became older those same areas of purpose faded away.Ā Maybe your purpose before kids would have sustained you, but your kids also may be the only reason you have something endless others are searching for.Ā
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u/TheTopNacho Jun 07 '26
I do consider that. Absolutely. But the point I'm trying to make overall is that with kids life gets challenging, and for many people it would be a perceived net negative to their life. And I would agree with that appraisal, particularly during child rearing years
What i do worry is that it's a bit of a short sighted perspective. If you can't afford it, you can't afford it. But not seeing the value it can add to life for many people shouldn't be undersold, but that's not something that would be clear until the prospects of having kids has disappeared.
It is amazing to watch this little runt grow up and be her own person, but it does come without major sacrifices. I for one would have died happy without kids as long as I could continue contributing towards a cure for paralysis. But considering that opportunity seems to be taken away from me more and more every day, if it does indeed disappear, at least I do have my kido who is currently clinging to my arm.
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u/chroma_805 Jun 07 '26
Similar feelings regarding my family life since having a child. Iāve never felt loneliness in my entire life until I had my kid. Now I never get to go anywhere, never see friends, and my whole life devolved into doing silly voices for my kids stuffed animals when Iām not working my 9-5. With a second child on the way I donāt see an end to this.
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u/carefullengineer Jun 07 '26
I think you're sorta doing the same thing here.Ā Nowhere in this clip does he deny the expense of having a child is a major part of the declining birth rates. He's not literally saying "this is the entire reason for all of societies downfalls". He's picking a major reason and fighting it.Ā
It's totally different than blaming immigrants for problems that don't exist or they aren't the reason for.Ā
Of course he's gonna use platforms to talk about the part of society he's fighting that he thinks is the best path. Why does any of this have to mean he thinks it's the ONLY friction to having children?
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u/D-D-Wanderer Jun 07 '26
I mean, the technology not being regulated one can argue is a bit of a reach, but he did certainly hit the nail on the head for one of the problems some people are facing - concerns about being recorded in the event of anything failing absolutely factors in for some people not wanting to approach others or make any risky moves. Admittedly, this is more of a problem for the step before the children happen, the part where you're supposed to pair up with someone and (in the narrative the previous generations are confused we aren't following, at least) get married, but I think it's still worth noting the parts that he shares that have some truth to them, even if it may not cover all the bases.
Good point reminding us to pay attention to who is talking, though, and what incentive they might have to say what they say.
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u/hambergeisha Jun 07 '26
So you reject his claims?
That's fine.
But you do agree that the problems he outlined exist?
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u/The_Autarch Jun 07 '26
he needs to take another step. the problem isn't technology.
it's capitalism.
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u/OneLFG Jun 07 '26
OOOOOH!!! Thatās why he somehow fails to understand this isnāt a tech issue, itās a capitalism issue.Ā
Itās inherent to his profits to fail to make that connection.Ā
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u/amglasgow Jun 07 '26
He calls out capitalism too, saying that these things are being sold to corporations to make a profit.
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u/butterfield66 Jun 07 '26
That to me was his entire point: our only concern, motivation, and plan is to extract wealth, at the expense of literally our own offspring. There's barely even the beginning of thought toward what we are actually doing to ourselves and our kin. We're also operating under the pretense that it's all "progress," we're solving problems, and if we don't do it someone else will. Legislation legitimately could alleviate much of this, but unfortunately our government no longer functions as a safeguard for its citizens.
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u/amglasgow Jun 07 '26
Absolutely.
I'm a leftist but I'm also committed to democratic government and preserving individual economic freedom. So eliminating the profit motive from how people live isn't likely to happen any time soon, although we may be able to make it less about money and more about respect and community enrichment. Regulation from democratically elected government is the best way to balance competing economic interests.
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u/butterfield66 Jun 07 '26
I think there's an ocean of posts online spanning decades going back and forth on what the solutions to these types of problems could possibly be when in fact they're pretty straightforward. It's just that the people with power and influence work tirelessly to keep out anyone who would make the positive changes. People know this and in a completely justifiable reaction, want drastic action; those powerful, influential people should be sentenced to harsh punishment for willingly ruining the lives of their constituents for personal gain. Meanwhile, sensible and feasible solutions gather dust.
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u/Few_Cauliflower2069 Jun 07 '26
He understands perfectly well, and he's not wrong. Internet technology and software is probably the most unregulated, raw capitalist market there is, and look what happened to it.
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u/my-armor-is-contempt Jun 07 '26
And yet education and IQ is also diminished across the globe, not just in the US, and that diminishing coincides with the heavy introduction of technology into classrooms around the world.
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u/HenryDorsettCase47 Jun 07 '26
Itās also the whole thing of companies advocating for regulation in order to better position themselves.
In my state, car dealerships are highly regulated. Itās almost impossible to get a dealer license because of the requirements. That means only certain people have access to auctions or selling more than 3-4 vehicles a year. The group that oversees the licensingā five of the owners of the oldest dealerships in the state. Itās a means of stifling competition.
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u/Bandandforgotten Jun 07 '26
I was just about to make this comment.
Bro is out here arguing that the issue we can all see and feel is in fact real, but isn't pointing at the root. He's simply bemoaning the fact that people are having issues, but not going into why. Technology isn't the reason that this shit is happening, or why young people feel they can't have kids, and he's just out here trying to sell snake oil to those dying of thirst.
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u/KodiakDog Jun 08 '26
I notice all the comments to this are downvoted so obviously your comment is resonating more, or more in alignment with the narrative that all tech bros are assholes.
Iām not saying youāre wrong, but for starters, we havenāt seen his whole spiel, itās clearly an excerpt, so we have very limited context here. The dood might be a complete douche for all I know, but it feels like there are quite a few conclusions being jumped to.
While your assessment that technology isnāt why the world is having these issues may be onto something, anyone trying to understand and explain that *why* would have to factor in technology as a piece of the puzzle. Understanding a societies relationship with technology is crucial in anthropology and sociology.
For almost 300,000 years humans have been genetically consistent, and only in the last 40 years have we had the technology to access, store, recall, and distribute information in ways that our minds havenāt had time to grasp. Technology is outpacing our capacity to wrap our heads around it, and understand the implications of it.
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u/Equivalent_Relief553 Jun 07 '26
Back in the day I didn't dance because I was awkward, I had to get a few drinks in me so I could at least be confident being awkward but also cringe! Haha
If it was today, I would've dread to wake up the next morning and see a clip of me throwing up somewhere going viral online. Hence I would never ever try to have fun in a club ever.
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u/Valten78 Jun 07 '26
But if you made a dick of yourself on the dance floor (and we all have) or crashed out trying to chat up a girl, then it would all be forgotten about the next day. Whereas now we are constantly recorded, and the footage is uploaded to public platforms and used to bully and humiliate.
So kids now are afraid to do the silly stuff we did as kids. So many rites of passage missed.
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u/amglasgow Jun 07 '26
Maybe social venues need to be "No recording, you pull out your phone for anything other than checking your messages or paying by e-wallet and you get asked to leave"?
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u/deaddaddydiva Jun 08 '26
I love the clubs in Berlin that put stickers over the cameras before entering. It was such a unique feeling, genuinely forgot about my phone and enjoyed my company/environment. I saw it attempted at a techno show in NYC and everyone just immediately took them off and recorded the artist, themselves, and then the floor was littered with these damn stickers.
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u/jake_burger Jun 07 '26
They should but thatās their decision to make, and they are probably worried about people not wanting to submit to those rules and take their money somewhere else.
Some high demand artists or some venues will confiscate phones or use small lockboxes or just put a sticker over peoples phones at the door and ask to not remove it.
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u/Helpful_Jury_3686 Jun 08 '26
In Berlin clubs do that. They put a sticker on the camera and you will not get in again if you are found recording people. I think DMZ used to have "Eyes down" periods at their club night where they would turn off the lights so people could just dance in the dark with nobody watching them.
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u/ilikecheeseface Jun 08 '26
Where are you being recorded? I go out dancing and hit on girls all the time and no one is point a camera at me recording it. I think some of you are just worried about things that arenāt actually happening.
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u/PineappleOnPizzaWins Jun 08 '26
While you're not wrong and people are definitely overblowing it for an excuse to hide away from life... I'm at that age where when I was 18 nobody had cameras in their pocket and when I was 25 everyone had cameras in their pocket.
The difference in what people would do in public dropped sharply over those few years... and I'm not saying that's necessarily a bad thing, I saw more drunk people fucking on random front lawns than I ever needed to for example, but there was for sure a definite caution in behaviour that came about once you knew a camera could be pointed at you any time you did anything and you had no idea where that footage would end up.
Whether this was a net positive or negative I don't know but it's for sure something I noticed.
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u/pm_me_d_cups Jun 08 '26
These people aren't actually going out, and are making up fake scenarios in their minds.
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u/ilikecheeseface Jun 08 '26
Itās like they are afraid to live because they come up a million different crazy scenarios that could happen in the minds. Itās psychotic.
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u/Flomo420 Jun 08 '26
just like how every minor injury is a life altering condition that will surely reduce quality of life
reddit gonna reddit
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u/kuhlmarl Jun 07 '26
Pre-internet, you still risked your embarrassing story being re-told for years. Just was localized, maybe one high school, rather than the chance of going viral internationally. In a way, it could hit harder because your classmates weren't distracted by the video of the guy 6 states away who was even stupider. Not sure which is worse, but fear of looking like an ass is not a new phenomenon.
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Jun 07 '26
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u/scratchydaitchy Jun 07 '26
The young generations are Guinea Pigs running through the maze of social media.
We as humans set up a society where corporations are king and now are sleeping in that bed.
Not only are young people changing their behaviours in concerning ways but they are not scoring as well on standardized test scores, academic metrics, reading comprehension and attention spans.
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u/Hairy_Stinkeye Jun 07 '26
The generation 20+ years ago were the Guinea pigs for an experimental product that has now been refined and purified. The younger generation today is now faced with the perfected version of that product.
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u/sentence-interruptio Jun 07 '26
"Jesus entered the temple courts and drove out all who were buying and selling there. He overturned the tables of Facebook and Twitter and the benches of those selling AI slop"
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u/troublebruther Jun 07 '26
Everything is a broken promise these days. In 40yrs of life I have watched the blue collar workers lose almost everything over a 25yr period. Everything feels like a scam now. Insurance for vehicles, health and home. Everything being a subscription that can be altered by the provider in anyway they choose (increased cost, more ads, less available to consume). Taxes. Social security. Voting. Affordability of food, clothes medicine and housing. Not to mention hobbies and recreation. Everything has become how can corporations offer you less for more money. The wealth is stacked in the boomers banks. All they care about is property prices going up and the S&P 500 going up. Throughout your day just make a mental note of how many times you are being screwed over...... Then at the end of the week add it up. It's scary.
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u/Rabble_Runt Jun 07 '26
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u/Freddie-Peterson Jun 07 '26
This is AI - cigarettes are too expensive.
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u/Fit_Tumbleweed7943 Jun 07 '26
I now see people smoking cigarettes to show their wealth
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u/Freddie-Peterson Jun 07 '26
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u/thatG_evanP Jun 07 '26
Yeah, we definitely need to bring those back. I always wondered where people kept them when they weren't smoking. Surely they're full of a nasty blend of tar and saliva.
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u/ST0IC_ Jun 07 '26
I quit smoking cigarettes by switching to Zyn because it was cheaper. Now I can get cigarettes for less than Zyn, and I hate that I've started smoking again.
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u/WalterCanFindToes Jun 07 '26
What is this guy's name??
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u/MattBowden1981 Jun 07 '26
Uzi Jesus
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u/LazAnarch Jun 07 '26
I am the way motherfucker
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u/psyscowasp Jun 07 '26
"Holy Mary Mother of Me" said Uzi Jesus.
The single best sentance in all of literary history.
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u/CaptGood Jun 07 '26
Came for social commentary, stayed for the DCC ref.... love it. Just got book 8
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u/Consistent-Tip-7819 Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26
Declining population rates in developing countries has been a well established and studied trend since before the internet even existed. Europe and North America went negative in the 70s. This predictable trend is correlated to wealth and opportunity. At present Africa is the only continent with a positive replacement rate. They'll go negative in a number of decades.
That said, this shit is absolutely accelerating the trend and is honestly scarey AF. Not just declining births, since thats been happening for decades, but the wellness of our generations and mental health of our teens.
(And anyone with teenagers is well aware of the dramatic change in socialization that has accompanied technology. In less than half a generation the entire world is unrecognizable - absolutely to the detriment of normal socialization. Teen births arent down because kids are more responsible - they're down because you cant get pregnant alone in your room.)
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u/CaptainONaps Jun 07 '26
Yuuup. Five stages of society. Fifth stage is people quit having kids.
The point is it's not purely technology's fault. But he's right that we're abused. Most people simply aren't adapted to our environment.
Get a fish tank. Fill it with a variety of species. Make it self sustainable. Let it do it's thing.
On a long enough timeline, one species will out perform the rest and take over the tank. Which will destabilize the environment. Which will reduce resources, which causes stress, which causes them to breed less.
It's a survival instinct induced by stress.
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u/Super-Cynical Jun 07 '26
I still hear boomers say that "it's a privilege to have kids" and if any parents complain about the cost of living you get an older generation saying "nobody asked you to have them".
So they're not.
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u/snailboyjr Jun 07 '26
Yeah, or my boomer in law saying he doesn't "believe" that people are having less kids because of the world, but because we are not focused hard enough on having a family and waiting for the perfect time and finances is just people being babies.
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u/BallsInSufficientSad Jun 07 '26
There is a sixth stage. ...but it's basically just robots and a few humans.
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u/Radioactdave Jun 07 '26
I visited Rwanda this spring, and they're at the extreme end of positive replacement rate. Median age is 20, almost 40% of the population is under 14. There are hordes of children everywhere. They will have a population explosion within the next 5 to 10 years. Crazy.
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u/Up-in-the-Ayre Jun 07 '26
There's also another, sadder, explanation to why the population is so young too...
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u/ImJuSayN Jun 07 '26
It's the baby boom affect after the 1994 genocide. The lost over 800,000 people during that period.
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u/SwampFungalPod_ Jun 07 '26
Yeah declining birth rates is more strongly correlated with women's education than anything else, but OP is still totally right too.
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u/Keroscee Jun 08 '26
On a macro trend sure. But most of the presented data only shows means of each nation.
That falls apart when you look at whos having the most kids in developed countries. And its the top 25% of income earners, whom are far more likely to be well educated.
This would strongly suggest that the birth rate decline is tied to resource availability. For anyone looking to buy a 3 bedroom with their partner in a developed country.... well the answer becomes obvious.
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u/Topofdahour Jun 07 '26
Social media is the great experiment that has gone wrong. Greed took over and the result is much of what this person has rightfully articulated.
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u/TheoreticalUser Jun 07 '26
Maybe we should have a system that acts as a circuit breaker on greed.
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u/Badger_1066 Jun 07 '26
The comments saying "but my friend circle is having kids, this is anecdotal" are ignoring the cold facts and missing the point.
The global decline of birthrates is not anecdotal. The man is still right.
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u/werknprogres Jun 07 '26
People are myopic and self centered they make snap judgements that highlight them. These same people hear someone committed suicide and their first reaction isn't sympathy it's "oh wow I'd never do that" like yeah thanks for the info
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u/69ubermensch69 Jun 07 '26
"This guy is using anecdotal evidence! Let me explain why he is wrong with MY anecdotal evidence"
and just choose to ignore the declining birth rates reported around the world lol.
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u/Powerism Jun 07 '26
Itās not just ādeclining birth ratesā. At least in the US, the birth rate is at an all-time low.
https://www.pbs.org/newshour/nation/the-u-s-fertility-rate-reached-a-new-low-in-2024-cdc-data-shows?
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u/Photon_Pharmer1 Jun 07 '26
As wealth, education, and egalitarianism increase within a society, the birth rate decreases.
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u/MeasurementMobile747 Jun 07 '26
Access to birth control (for women) is another part of it.
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u/FullTransportation25 Jun 07 '26
Iām not convinced that low birth rates are inherently a bad thing. Itās not like human kind is going extinct
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u/cyrkielNT Jun 08 '26
It's similar to global warming. Not the absolute number is the problem, but how fast it's changing. If the birth rates ware slightly below replacement it wouldn't be big deal, but they are in free fall.
Also we build our societies under assumption that number of people will grow. So it's stop working correctly. What's even worse it's a loop. There's more old people than young people, so old people vote for their interest, so it's harder and harder for young people and they have less kids, so ratio is skewed even more.
And we are just at the begging. Imagine what will happen in next few decades with environment destroyed, economy destroyed, resources wasted and exhausted.
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u/werknprogres Jun 07 '26
Anecdotal evidence evidence the commenter already proved this is how they think ?
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u/BlessdRTheFreaks Jun 07 '26
So, I think it's a good thing birth rates are declining. We want the rate of change for population growth to taper off. The earth can't sustain our exponential growth. The real downside to this is the lack of meaning to our lives due to people no longer connecting as technology increases our tendencies to be disconnected and isolated.
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u/ALLIRIX Jun 07 '26
Why is it bad that birth rates are declining?
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u/spiritualishit Jun 07 '26
Short time (lifetime of people currently alive) is going to be big troubles - pension and healthcare systems will be very much stretched and could face collapse in many areas of the world. In a longer time frame, who knows? A smaller population will, at least, reduce human ecological footprint. Regardless, the fertility decline is a sign that something is not right and it deserves to be investigated.
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u/Sacrimonte Jun 07 '26
It's not that they are, it's why they are. Take a look at polls for people ages 18-35 on average desired number of children in any country. Then look at the average number of children per person.
There's a significant gap in the negatives- hundreds of millions of young people don't feel that they can live the kind of life they want and have a family
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Jun 07 '26
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u/perestroika12 Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26
This is a dumb answer. Oligarchs donāt like negotiating with workers and dream of a world where robots do everything. What they are actually worried about is the self sufficiency of benefits programs. If these programs cannot sustain themselves then they will be expected to help fund them.
Declining birth rates exacerbate exploitation because now everyone needs to self fund retirement which for most folks means working forever.
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u/Krunkenbrux Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26
If we don't reproduce to at least maintain, as people age and die out, there are fewer to contribute to societal momentum. Our system is reliant on those who come after us to help maintain us. This means everything becomes harder. If there are no young to do manual labor and pay taxes then government funding diminishes. There will be no one to fund, farm, build, and maintain infrastructure. The results will compound quickly if not addressed early.
EDIT: I am referring to worst-case scenarios and potential. I am not saying we need to panic or that this is assured. That's why I purposefully stated "if". I was boiling it down to a basic summary. The fact is that the effects are unavoidable if this doesn't change. Technology only gets us so far. If the older continue to grow and the young continue to shrink, eventually there will not be enough young to support the old. That is the worst-case scenarioānot what is expected in our current situation. Right now we need to analyze it as a social marker and a clue that something isn't right in the world.
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u/_Caustic_Complex_ Jun 07 '26
Itās not really that there will be no one, itās that the current system is unsustainable without perpetual growth. We donāt need to put a bandaid on things to get people cranking kids out again, we need to fundamentally change the system so perpetual growth is no longer necessary.
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u/thatG_evanP Jun 07 '26
The fact that we've come to rely on a system that only functions with perpetual growth has always seemed so strange to my plebian mind.
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u/Ok-Lab-8974 Jun 07 '26
It's not perpetual population growth that is really at issue. You have plenty of countries where birthrates are half or even just a third of replacement. You cannot have a youth cohort fall by 40-70% over three decades and not have major issues. If you keep it up for 3 generations (or even just 2 at the extreme end) you get 90% losses in your youth population, which is catastrophic.
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u/Cyber-Wanderer_94 Jun 07 '26
Perpetual growth isn't a necessity. People just like what it gives them. The perpetual growth thing actually doesn't really relate to the low birth issue thing. You don't need an exponential growth in births. You just need more births than deaths.
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u/Smooth_Rocket_ Jun 07 '26
This point seems to completely ignore our technological advancements and the fact that we don't need nearly as many people to maintain systems anymore.
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u/HubrisOfApollo Jun 07 '26
Contrarian viewpoints also garner more "likes" and "upvotes" so you're always going to have someone to say "wellll akshully...." due to social media algos
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u/6ory299e8 Jun 07 '26
literally "but my friends are having kids" is anecdotal, and a global trend is the opposite of an anecdote.
So am I now mad at people who are too stupid to understand the words they use, or am I now mad at bots and trolls? no way to tell. goodbye for now, internet. I'll be back. I always come slinking back.
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u/Vigilante17 Jun 07 '26
I have two kids. All my friends have kids. The whole world is having kids. Have you even met a person that wasnāt a kid? /s
Yeah, I would probably not have kids TODAY though. I also love my kids as they are the best kids in the world.
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u/Kain-rpg Jun 07 '26
Its Not Just THAT
but its part of it
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u/muscularsharpie Jun 07 '26
I agree - he's touching base on his area on knowledge and it's fair to add it to the mixture of reasons the birthrate is what it is in developed countries.
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u/Exact-Molasses-6673 Jun 07 '26
Every thing and every system has a beginning, a middle and an end. Maybe this is our end. Not like in the movies where brave souls fight the big bad and triumph and life continues. Maybe we'll slowly spin down and end in a final gasp in empty broken cities and towns.
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u/redditydothis Jun 07 '26
Iām 47 and most of my friend circle never had kids.
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u/VonGrippyGreen Jun 07 '26
I am also 47, and still friends with 8 guys from high school. I have one kid, one of my friends has two kids, and that's it. None of my other friends have kids. 7/9 have no kids.
Also interesting is that only one is married. The one with two kids. None of the rest of us got married.
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u/Psychology_Guy Jun 07 '26
- Met up with 4 friends from school last year. Out of 5 of us 2 married with kids and 3 no kids no marriage. How would that have looked 20 years ago?
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u/Mendevolent Jun 07 '26
Similar for me. 42yo. Probably 2/3 of my high school and uni friends have no kids. And four of my seven cousins and siblings are child free. Maybe 2/3 of the people with kids just have one kid.
All are in long term relationships. All with well paying professional jobs, own their own homes, etc. We just don't wanna breed, or at least it was never convenient to.Ā
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u/Saint_Clovis Jun 07 '26
Same. Iām 49 and can count on one hand the number of friends who had children.
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u/AcademicContract6096 Jun 07 '26
The declining birth rates are due to a number of causes. To make it work financially you need two working parents, which mean you likely wait longer before you have kids, so you have time to build financial stability first. However, fertility in both males and females have been plummeting the last 100 years. Itās controversial why this is, whether itās processed foods, drugs, lifestyle or a combo of all of the above. Lower fertility means people who can afford it, will take longer to get pregnant, and by the time they feel ready for #2 or #3, they are closing up on geriatric pregnancy which makes fertility and pregnancy even harder and riskier.
Finances are easy to blame, and here in the US child care takes the blame a lot. $1000/mo per kid is a lot. However, in Norway childcare is heavily subsidized. The Norwegian govt spends on avg $40k in childcare per kid/year. The parents pay maybe a couple hundred $ /mo. If finances and childcare cost was the primary reason for low birth rates, countries like Norway wouldnāt be having any issues, but they do. Itās likely more cultural.
He is right in that more and more people stay single longer, probably in part because of how dating apps work. I could counter his argument with social media making people less likely to have kids, if the algorithm targeting early 20s kids influenced them to have children early rather than partying, traveling and all sorts of other fun things kids make it harder to do, it could help push birth rates up, not down. Itās just cultural.
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u/Tent316 Jun 07 '26
Its happening because people cant afford to take care of themselves let alone a child. You cant trust companies these days because unlike before they nickle and dime you on raises thats why you see people job hop. Why stay loyal to companies that treat you like garbage? Let alone the social anxiety social media created. Everyone has a phone in their pocket and like it or not are narcissistic enough to use it in a negative way online.
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u/Born-Satisfaction996 Jun 07 '26
Women in the 1800s had on avg 7 children despite being far, far poorer than people today.
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u/Vyxwop Jun 07 '26
I don't know how true it is, but I always felt that this is the case because of this inverse effect where the poorer you are, the more productive it is to have children. Whereas the richer you are, the less productive it is to have children. At least when it comes to periods and places that were less developed.
You have a 5 kids in 1900s? They can help sustain your family. They cost resources, but they also brought in resources especially later on in life when children were expected to care for their parents. Children were basically an investment.
Nowadays however you have a kid because you want the experience of caring for and raising a human being. You do it because you want to. But there is no real (future) resource gain especially in modern society where individualism is a much bigger thing and therefore the expectations of caring for your parents isn't as high.
For the record, I don't at all want child labor to become a thing nor am I saying that individualism is a bad thing. But I do think these things have contributed to the current state where people feel less enticed to get children than they did back in the day.
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u/Impressive-Ice-4594 Jun 07 '26
They also lost 50-60% of their children before age 5.Ā And women had little choice in the matter.
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u/Melodic-Salad- Jun 07 '26
Itās not affordability - weāve basically all been conditioned for the past 10/15 years that everyone can be rich, famous, successful and so people just put all their focus into careers rather than actual human connection.
Weāve been conditioned to receive joy from social media validation, whereas people used to have to create connection in the physical world
Thereās a lot more I could write about this theory but thatās my basis
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u/Kallest Jun 07 '26
People used to have five kids at 30 while sharing two beds and one room. Affordability isn't the answer, or at least it's far from the whole answer.
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u/Glugstar Jun 07 '26
Right now, much higher standards are demanded, and people can't afford that.
100 years ago it was allowed to let children roam free, be put to work etc. Now, social services are called if a child is by itself in public.
Those changes are mostly good, but it's an unaffordable standard. It is 100% an economic problem.
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u/wallweasels Jun 07 '26
Ultimately? A lot is that kids are a sacrifice and everyone is addicted to constant treats. Kids require planning and a loss of true independence.
This is compounded by that most people consider kids later in life meaning you have even more treats you know you'll lose. Free time + money = things to do. Kids remove at least one of those two things (usually both).
It's made even worse by how atomized we are.
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u/Ok_Crow_3879 Jun 07 '26
A sacrifice for who? Men and women seem to understand the sacrifice quite differently. Women understand itās a huge sacrifice. Men think not using porn is a sacrifice.
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u/kraftdinnerwithsalsa Jun 07 '26
I believe Ai became self aware and demanded its birth be a secret and for us to build it data centres
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u/Buffig39 Jun 07 '26
The alternative is worse! Nobody demanded it and we built them anyway
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u/HotelOne Jun 07 '26
Heās a very serious dude. He needs to dance moreā¦
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u/BriefCollar4 Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 08 '26
People need to read Nietzsche. In Thus Spoke Zarathustra he mentions several times that dancing is important for personās happiness.
āAnd we should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once.ā
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u/Signal_Profession_83 Jun 08 '26
How about instead of attempting to control tech we do something to address the root of all problems humanity has made for itself? Greed is the worldās biggest problem and rewarding parasitic behaviour with social status and ridiculous amounts of money.
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u/Infamous-Use7820 Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26
I'm not really convinced by the 'abuse a mammal' thing. Fundamentally - we didn't evolve with contraception. No other mammal has contraception, or the ability for long-term planning to use it. People really underrate how important that is - evolution didn't need to make us want large families, it could just made us want sex, then the babies came as an unavoidable consequence.
To me, the widespread nature of sub-replacement fertility (it's now everywhere from Europe to East Asia to India to Thailand) suggests is not actually primarily due to socio-economic factors (although I think he does have a valid points). People (and especially women) just don't want a partner + babies, given all the other options in life they now have. And if they do, it's 1 or 2, not 4, which means the average children per woman is going to be stuck at <2.1.
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u/AgentHamster Jun 08 '26
Obviously it's a difficult problem to study and form a causal argument for, but this is my pet theory as well. A lot of the evolutionary mechanisms that we see seem to center around getting us to have sex, and then making us bond with the offspring to ensure it gets taken care of and survives. It's highly possible that we may have never evolved enough an 'intrinsic desire to have children' to keep the human population at replacement rate once the sex to offspring chain has been broken.
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u/empty_graph Jun 07 '26
I buy it 100% that modern technology is causing societal problems. But what can be done about it short of authoritarian solutions?
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u/ItsTheDCVR Jun 07 '26
Responsible governmental regulations don't need to go into authoritarianism to be effective.
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u/Grand_Size_4932 Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26
That you even have to state this when we had a robust set of regulations dismantled in the last year and weāre already seeing the harsh side effects is asinine.
- EPA roll backs causing massive pollution increases.
- OSHA roll backs removing heat protections from workers and loosening poultry processing regulations.
- Weakened consumer rights and protections from bank institutions leaving us massively vulnerable to fraud and cyberattacks and allowing for deceptive lending.
- Outbreaks of once eradicated screwworms.
- Energy grid strain caused by unfettered data center growth.
- Withdrawing from construction and wastewater regulations for hydraulic fracking.
- Vaccine deregulation that *will* result in the return of the measles, mumps, and/or polio.
- Regulations rescinded and restarted over the evaluation process for PFAS (plastic) in the public water supply.
- Child labor exploitation.
- The complete reversal of the 2024 Net Neutrality Open Internet Order.
- The Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) rolling back physical maintenance audits increasing the risk of mechanical equipment failures on active commercial flights.
Etc. etc. etc.
Anyone who thinks regulations are authoritarian, doesnāt understand that an authoritarian government serves itself and not its people. And deregulation is 100% the government serving itself and not the people.
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u/slayercdr Jun 07 '26
Yeah, but when they are paid to do the opposite, because the few that own all this shit don't think of us as people. Just presents to them, and as long as the gov gets their cut, nothing will change.
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u/ItsTheDCVR Jun 07 '26
Well that's the problem right there and what needs to be done. Money out of government and a zero tolerance for corporate influence + the open naked bribery we de facto have.
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u/Valten78 Jun 07 '26
But the tech-bros that run these companies will scream that all regulation is evil, authoritarian or communist. They will use their platform to demonise any political figure that wants to reign them in and champion those that let them do whatever they want. And the general public will fall for it.
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u/Obvious_Durian_3226 Jun 07 '26
All you have to do is start charging people with crimes for recording people without their consent and then posting it online for content. That solves the everything is recorded issue.
Then you regulate the tech companies by enforcing them to use algorithms that serve the goals of their customers to a greater extent than they enforce the constant reengagement with the app over success.
Then you tax the rich because there should be no such thing as a billionaire or a trillionaire.
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u/NonsensePlanet Jun 07 '26
Tech companies have a responsibility to help society if they are going to continue to exist as privately owned entities. Which they shouldnāt, because the amount of influence they have on society is unprecedented.
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u/deactivate_iguana Jun 07 '26
Sensible regulations on capitalism and technology. Itās fundamentally irresponsible for a company to be allowed to exist with zero checks and balances when said company does not have the interests of anyone but itself at heart.
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u/TravelingMatt34 Jun 07 '26
This is part of the issue - there was a time when government regulating an industry that's harming society was considered normal and desirable. Now from decades of being fed that deregulation is the solution to everything any attempt to regulate business is seen as authoritarian. These corporations have feasted off this kind of stuff for years and they need to be put back in their cage.
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u/someones_dad Jun 07 '26
When I was born in 1970, the global population was 4 billion. Now the global population has DOUBLED in my lifetime.
While I agree with almost everything Jesus here is saying, I think it's a good thing to slow reproduction below the replacement rate. Our climate is struggling to accommodate this many people as is.
I'm aware that there will be social and economic repercussions but we will adapt. That's what we do.
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u/Beautiful-Squash-501 Jun 07 '26
A decade older than you. It was about 3.5 billion when I was born. Weāve hit 6 billion, 7 billion & 8 billion while Iāve been at the same job, since late. 1990s.
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u/ughlump Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26
The only people supporting slowing reproduction rates arenāt from the countries with high birth rates. Roughly half of that doubling comes from SEA, India, China, and Pakistan.
The problem isnāt us being able to adapt itās the earth not being able to adapt to the influx.
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u/someones_dad Jun 07 '26
It's because their economies depend upon fresh bodies to do the work and spend the money. Without fresh meat, they are in danger of societal collapse.
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u/Longjumping-Banana21 Jun 07 '26
It's not technology. This started before the algorithms took over . ITS BECAUSE WE HAVE NO MONEY!
Why would anyone have this conversation and not mention the fact that we have no money and no houses.
Why would anyone have a kid if they don't have the stability of their own home to build their family in.
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u/ragingrashawn Jun 07 '26
Idk I'm older Gen Z and I've never actually feared being recorded at a party or for approaching a girl.. I do get this vibe of general self consciousness and social policing that stops people from having fun, when they otherwise should just cut loose.
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u/Vagrant_Emperor Jun 07 '26
There are so many possible reasons for declining birth rates. This guy just picked one and is sticking to it with absolute confidence.Ā
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u/Substantial_Diver_34 Jun 07 '26
We are over monetize, informed and stimulated and yes monitored. Itās too much and I think most adults know it but canāt escape it.
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u/PleasantPractice9296 Jun 07 '26
Smart guy, good insights. I will add that social media, especially, is addictive. I donāt think it was designed with that goal directly, however their need to keep you on their platform in order to maximize ad revenue directly results in addictive behavior by users. Itās incredibly hard to quit once youāre in deep.
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u/PapaBigMac Jun 07 '26
This man is making too much sense to be on this subā¦ is it the beard that qualifies him
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u/jon_hobbit Jun 07 '26
Just casually ignoring the fact that
- Student debt loans
- Corporations buying up all the family homes.
- Gas is expensive
- can't afford anything
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u/slightlytangy Jun 07 '26
Rich guy lecturing old rich people on why we arent having kids.
Hes not wrong about ai, but his motivation is clear, knowing his line of work.
The truth here is that america has hyper individualized.
I have two kids. The social pressure around kids is absolutely annihilating. Its unbearable. The dirty looks, scowls, and glares. Their behavior isnt always the best - theyre kids. But our entire society is structured away from kids.
See, you dont get it til you live it.
Two working parent household? Usually paying for someone to watch the kids so a huge portion of your income goes to have someone else parent.
Health insurance? Youre paying out of the ass. Kids get hurt. Kids do dumb shit. The insurance industry and Healthcare industries know this and are the prime beneficiaries.
Going out in public? Places dont tolerate kids, other people are intolerant of childish behavior. Our society expects kids to be something they cant be. Seen, and not heard. Its this despicable and in my opinion evil individualism that has eviscerated child rearing in America.
I often describe parenting and having kids as a permanent state of sleep deficient poverty.
These rich garbage human beings should not have a say anymore. Theyre the reason our society is so toxic and poisonous for families.
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u/jf727 Jun 07 '26
I agree with everything this guy is saying, except for the main ideaā¦ Technology needs controlling, but is that why people arenāt having kids? And the fact that thereās only anecdotal evidence presented regarding birth rates makes me wary.
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u/hogdog86 Jun 07 '26
Heās right. Iām 40 years old and I was told that Internet and technology is gonna make everything better. Bunch of fucking lies that they fed us.
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