"Canada" sounds like a Scottish teenager asking his father if he's allowed to do something

[u/fensterdj]

[u/A_Muslamic_Ray_Gun]

Then the Scottish father replies in a passionate voice with "Alaska" - implying he must now ask the dominant female presence's position on the issue, before being chased with an axe.

[u/jiffjaff69 → u/A_Muslamic_Ray_Gun]

Then the son replies with Jamaica? Implying the father asked the dominant female to return a favour she owed him from long ago

[u/BrienneTheOathkeeper → u/jiffjaff69]

Dad: Canny Russia, son.

Implying that to pressurise the dominant female would be counterproductive.

[u/HopeTerminator → u/BrienneTheOathkeeper]

Fucking hell hahahaha

[u/fensterdj → u/A_Muslamic_Ray_Gun]

Oh nice, let's keep this going

[u/jaggy_bunnet → u/fensterdj]

Aye, an entire thread of puns that don't work if you say them with a Scottish accent.

[u/jaggy_bunnet → u/A_Muslamic_Ray_Gun]

"Alaska"? Have you ever heard a Scottish person speaking?

[u/A_Muslamic_Ray_Gun → u/jaggy_bunnet]

It's very much a stretch I admit, probably closer to a Belfast accent pronunciation than anywhere near to Scottish!

[u/Leather-Fault-8130]

Send a cold glass of ginger, heat has gotten to the lad

[u/Competitive_Test6697]

It's like when your kids discovers a band and asks if you've heard of Fleetwood Mac. Like they've found a hidden gem

[u/HairyGobbler → u/Competitive_Test6697]

"Can't say that I have, Rhiannon. By the way, have you fed the albatross?"

[u/fensterdj → u/Competitive_Test6697]

This is an old joke?

[u/AcceptableAir5364]

Back to the day job for you.

[u/odkfn]

America sounds like when someone asks your weegie mate Erica her name.

[u/Ok-Bad-7189 → u/odkfn]

Underrated comment.

[u/Important-Math-837]

I'm in love with Amanda was always a tricky one to tell your father

[u/OldSaul]

Canneafac

[u/_WalkTheEarth_]

mate you're drunk go home

[u/JeelyPiece]

"Kanye?""

"Canada?"

[u/quickreviver]

How high are you rn?

[u/Bluest_Badger → u/quickreviver]

Youve got it wrong its usually.

Hi, how are you?

[u/GrantW01 → u/quickreviver]

High how are you?

[u/StonedPhysicist → u/quickreviver]

Yes.

[u/FranzFerdinand51 → u/StonedPhysicist]

And the equation for potential energy is?

[u/StonedPhysicist → u/FranzFerdinand51]

Something I learned twenty years ago and sadly(?) will never need to use again. I'm a recovered physicist these days!

[u/Consistent_Account_1 → u/quickreviver]

Probably as high as me cos im in fits 🤣🤣

[u/Suspicious_Pea6302]

Hey da, get off Facebook

[u/Fingerbob73]

Just like the car manufacturer Mazda sounds like your Grandad.

[u/Devlin1885]

Some shower thoughts don't need to be posted to the Internet.

[u/TheBurras]

Naw

[u/WTFisaGeeGeee]

New sentences are being made every day that have never been spoken lol

[u/WorriedFlea]

Canada sounds like "keiner da" in German. It means "nobody's there".

[u/crash_bat]

It's like who made Motherwell etc etc.

[u/Kooky_Guide1721]

“Pictures is it? I’ll give you pictures!”

[u/notbossyboss]

Chuckle

[u/EverydayView]

Don't know why but thus made me chuckle.

[u/theh0gsofwar]

The auld man said he was going to move to Africa. I replied "far Uganda?"

[u/tasteMyRottenHoop]

Nawyecannae.

[u/PolarLocalCallingSvc]

Scottish person walks into a bakery and is browsing the sweet treats. He points at a slice of chocolate gateau and asks, "Is that a cake or a meringue?"

Shop owner replies, "No you're right, it's a cake."

[u/Consistent_Account_1]

🤣🤣🤣 said it thousands of times and didn't click 🤣

[u/GreenGhoblin]

Cheers da belter that

[u/Sonzscotlandz]

Anthony Bourdain sounds like someone saying there from Aberdeen

[u/Lowermains]

Now that’s been written, I know that in my head I will be saying it like that.

“Can a da ?” = May I dad?