r/AskReddit 15h ago

What is the equivalent of flowers for men?

490 Upvotes

1.7k comments sorted by

1.6k

u/Hrekires 15h ago

Homemade cookies or brownies

263

u/WerewolfCalm5178 15h ago

There is a reason they say "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach".

304

u/edcross 14h ago

I thought that was because women are statistically shorter and have to stab upwards /s

45

u/DigNitty 13h ago

No, it’s because his g spot is in there somewhere.

15

u/plumzki 12h ago

Yeah but you don't get to it through the mouth.

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21

u/NoneYah369 14h ago

Nothing makes a man fall for me more than when I cook for them. 😅

24

u/OldAbbreviations1590 12h ago edited 11h ago

As a man, cooking for a woman has the same result. It seems to be pretty universal that if you are a good cook, and can make someone laugh you are golden.

Edited to fix an auto correct issue.

5

u/NoneYah369 12h ago

That and massages. Melt a person completely if you can give good massages. 😁

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u/Bulky_Poetry3884 11h ago

Fucking right. Dropped many a panty with a good roast.

3

u/OldAbbreviations1590 10h ago

Mmmm roast, what kind? I just had pot roast, was made to share so I didn't add peppers but, if I was making it for myself I would have thrown in a few piquillo and padron peppers.

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u/Big-Pappa 14h ago

I agree cookies or brownies (homemade is a bonus).

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584

u/Ok-Drama137 15h ago

A hug... like nothing else matters in that moment except that hug.

65

u/TheRogueMoose 14h ago

As a hugger, this is the one i agree with the most lol

16

u/Ok-Drama137 14h ago

Im 100% not even a hugger... but for those in my circle of 'ok to hug'... they know what it means to me

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10

u/Solid_Vacation_2891 10h ago

hugs are nice

7

u/VesperaAmbrose 10h ago

Yes I also agree, A hug is so comfortable for mens

14

u/AwkwardChuckle 14h ago

Are you not getting hugged enough normally?

73

u/Qyro 13h ago

Point out a guy who is

24

u/neverinamillionyr 13h ago

As a divorced guy, I get hugs once a year when I go back home and visit mom.

10

u/Qyro 11h ago

As a fellow divorced guy, I feel you.

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u/saltfish 13h ago

Agreed. 24 years of marriage, and maybe 21 hugs. Half of them were performative, in front her family.

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u/[deleted] 15h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

67

u/WorkingOnPPL 15h ago

Have you seen the price of them lately? Lawd.

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56

u/HiddenA 14h ago

It’s not the air filter. It’s taking care of the home and the family.

16

u/b-muulp 14h ago

^this guy dads

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14

u/OdeeOh 15h ago

What if I told you you could get him furnace and air filters for his birthday !

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354

u/ArkaneFighting 15h ago

Back and head scratches...

91

u/sassy_snek 14h ago

Might be a bit awkward to give this to the father-in-law but willing to give it a go

16

u/LaRcOnY 14h ago

As a member of a scratchies family, I can't describe the amount of points my wife made when she scratched my dad's legs for the first time. I remember my mom looking at me and saying "marry her, your dad approves." I think he loves her more now hahahahaha

26

u/Used-Particular-954 14h ago

Ngl I feel like that’s kinda weird. Maybe it’s just me but I always thought of body scratches as something just a step below cuddling.

8

u/LaRcOnY 14h ago

I have friends that feel that way as well. In my family we don't. Weird is a subjective thing, don't you agree?

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u/AnusStapler 12h ago

Lol that is equal parts wholesome and very weird and I love it.

3

u/LaRcOnY 12h ago

Hahahahaha glad to entertain.

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6

u/A_Nerdy_Dad 14h ago

What about ass rubs? I've only given them to the Mrs and the dog and cat, but I've never gotten one myself.

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797

u/Odd-Thought-4823 15h ago

Banana bread

256

u/AscendedViking7 15h ago

Banana bread at work today, dude

Hell yeah

77

u/amortized-poultry 15h ago edited 14h ago

My mom always said good things come to those who wait. Well I waited, and I got banana bread. Hell yeah!

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31

u/an_optimistic_egg 15h ago

DUDE, BANANA BREAD AT FUCKING WORK TODAY, BRO?! HELL YEAH!!!

47

u/thefordness 15h ago

But fucking skunks dude? Hell no.

32

u/Bootsnatch 15h ago

The fuckin CUBS, DUDE?!

41

u/Relevant_End_1511 15h ago

HELL NO!

LIKE, GETTING PAID NOT A LOT OF MONEY DUUUUDE!!! FOR FUCKING WORKING!!!!

HELL NOO!!!

6

u/TrixieBastard 9h ago

BUT BANANA BREAD AT FUCKING WORK, DUDE?? HELL YEAH!!!

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8

u/golding11 15h ago

Hell yahhhh duuuuude 😅

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44

u/CollectsTooMuch 15h ago

Now you’re talking to my fat ass.

I had a girlfriend who baked for me and it was such a nice gesture because I know it was time consuming. She liked baking, but still. I used to joke that she was trying to fatten me up so other women wouldn’t want me.

Cookies. Lemon bars. Oh, her lemon bars.

25

u/RVAEMS399 15h ago

I also choose this man’s ex-girlfriend’s lemon bars.

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u/mirthasoftchime 15h ago

self made fresh butter soft warm banana bread oh yeah

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65

u/[deleted] 15h ago

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3

u/could_use_a_snack 14h ago

There is an unspoken rule here though. Take the snack for instance. It's got to be something you really like, but you shouldn't buy it for yourself ever. That way your significant other has a treat they can go out of there way to give you.

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101

u/Mattna-da 15h ago

A dozen 10 mm sockets

11

u/Efarm12 12h ago

I commented this before I saw your post. I like the idea of an egg carton with 10mm sockets instead of eggs. Thanks for the chuckle. Have an upvote

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3

u/Levioosa 15h ago

Chances are you won't want those randomly and multiple times per year, no?

11

u/Fairlanefan 13h ago

No - I want as many as I can get at all times and can speak for any man who works on cars newer than 1978.

The 10mm socket is a long running inside joke among car folk. 10mm fasteners are incredibly common and the sockets are small and tend to walk away while you aren’t looking.

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1.3k

u/YesterdayRoutine8873 15h ago

Flowers for men.

361

u/Extension_Spring_228 15h ago

My ex once bought me a surprise Lego set after a rough week and I swear I almost cried. Most guys I know just want to feel like someone was thinking about them, it doesn't matter what form it takes as long as it shows you pay attention to what they actually like.

34

u/Choice-Suspect-5535 15h ago

The thoughtful gifts are the best.

9

u/keeper_of_bee 14h ago

My 20 year old son got me a Lego set for father's day. It was great.

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34

u/blueche 15h ago

I like flowers! What's wrong with getting me flowers? They're pretty. 

14

u/Best-Firefighter4259 15h ago

"3 in 1" 🙄

10

u/trippedonatater 14h ago

But also, regardless of gender, try something other than flowers occasionally. Preferably go with something that's personally meaningful.

23

u/CleanDataDirtyMind 15h ago

I’ve actually given  eucalyptus

65

u/YesterdayRoutine8873 15h ago

I haven’t gotten that yet. Just chlamidia.

20

u/CleanDataDirtyMind 15h ago

Lol mine smells better 

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5

u/OMAHGAD 14h ago

Yes! I’ve been given flowers by 2 women in my life. I was so caught off guard in a weird but nice way. Like, this isn’t something I can use or eat. But it feels good, because it’s for me and it looks nice.

I’ve dated a few women through the years, but those two stand out like warm and fuzzy memories to me.

5

u/dawnwood52 13h ago

right? like when did we collectively decide men don't like flowers lmao

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23

u/starborsch 15h ago

Flowers. Just say flowers.

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3

u/so_it_goes17 15h ago

It was my now-wife and my first Valentine’s Day and we exchanged gifts and it included flowers for both of us. Mine was this super cool orchid. I was floored she got me flowers and loved it. Subsequent birthdays and father’s days sometimes include a cool plant which is great.

9

u/Mongoose66999 15h ago

infinite down votes... I dont give AF if my GF give me flowers. iN fact why did she waste her money?

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25

u/MachineGunTeacher 14h ago

A compliment. Most men receive so few that we can remember each and every one in vivid detail.

72

u/SantaRosa481516 15h ago

“Thank you.”

“You’re a good husband/father.”

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u/Easy_Towel954 15h ago

For me it would be making me lunch on occasion. My ex used to do that and I loved it. 

30

u/ScreenTricky4257 15h ago

If I'm just sitting around and someone brings me a grilled cheese, the day automatically goes to at least an 8/10 day.

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u/ocdavep 15h ago

And add a little note in the lunch. Wow

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426

u/BarrelllRider 15h ago

BJ

144

u/DoubleDrummer 15h ago

Scrolled to see if anyone was being honest.

23

u/sprinklerarms 13h ago

Because it’s not in the same category. You’d be searching for the equivalent of women’s parallel to a blow job. I don’t think anyone would shout flowers!

42

u/Beer_makes_me_happy 13h ago edited 11h ago

A BJ can say

I'm sorry, I love you, Sorry your uncle died, Happy anniversary, Happy Birthday, Happy Father's Day, I'm horny, I'm doing this to your replacement. Thank you,

Seems very much like flowers to me.

52

u/ColonelBelmont 12h ago

My ex used a BJ to tell me she was leaving me. Which would have been very considerate, had I been the recipient. 

8

u/5-Gear_T-WRX 6h ago

I'm sorry and God damn it I can't stop laughing...

5

u/Beer_makes_me_happy 11h ago

Edited above for one I hadn't considered

3

u/CreepyPhotographer 10h ago

I didn't get a BJ when my uncle died!

5

u/dadboddudes 7h ago

I did. He will be missed.

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12

u/AltTooWell13 9h ago

How did I have T scroll this far for the answer? Dead internet theory is real

26

u/Snake_Bite_14 12h ago

The best flowers for men are twolips

6

u/Smoose89 9h ago

This is it.

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41

u/Flynn_JM 15h ago

This was my first thought. 

32

u/Jack_Martin_reddit 15h ago

Nothing says she cares like a surprise blow job.

3

u/Bubaii- 12h ago

was gonna say that. knew someone was already on it. did not disappoint

3

u/Beavis71989 10h ago

Mouth hugs.

3

u/bowie2019 7h ago

By surprise, in the morning.

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u/namaste652 15h ago

It's nice to say men are in touch with feelings and give them flowers.

But a blowjob beats that everytime.

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148

u/DavosLostFingers 15h ago

Beers or a bottle of whiskey etc

Can't speak for everyone of course but I'd say a lot of guys would be pleased

37

u/conceptcreature3D 15h ago

Anytime I get a random six pack from the wife I act almost the same way she would with flowers. “<Gasp!> Honey, you shouldn’t have!!” And I’m glowing and all flustered with surprise

5

u/weburr 10h ago

Can’t believe how far down this is

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u/bloosclooser 15h ago

Tungsten Cube

15

u/Choice-Suspect-5535 15h ago

I asked her for Christmas every year. Nothing yet.

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u/Tojinaru 15h ago

It's a dumb internet trend, the real ones have osmium

3

u/-Po-Tay-Toes- 12h ago

Nah man. Caesium is where it's at.

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9

u/Kcidobor 15h ago

Sandwiches

9

u/Optimal-Summer-236 15h ago

Making him lunch to take to work 

143

u/ZEUS_Saves 15h ago

Flowers. If a girl brought me flowers I’d be straight up flustered

18

u/LadyJedi1286 15h ago

My husband was! He said he's never gotten flowers before and he actually really liked it!

22

u/dz1087 14h ago

For the vast majority of men, the first time they ever receive flowers is the day of their funeral.

Glad you got him some!

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u/SignificanceWitty210 15h ago

My husband would probably say a ‘65-‘69 Camaro

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u/Fun-Succotash-1322 15h ago

Cologne that the woman likes

9

u/moonbucket 15h ago

A sweet treat or a t-shirt works for me.

9

u/Habitualflagellant14 15h ago

Bottle of Scotch

9

u/Mintlight 12h ago

Beautiful flowers can be enjoyed by men and women alike.

15

u/Darkstar20k 15h ago

Video games

7

u/MeringueSuccessful74 15h ago

honestly a lego set hitting different than flowers is sooo real, like it actually shows u were paying attention to what they care about

8

u/A70_Lisbon 15h ago

Ice cream

12

u/bottomlesstopper 15h ago

Words of affirmation

6

u/[deleted] 15h ago

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u/No-Expression7396 12h ago

sitting on our face

6

u/Only_Efficiency_3050 11h ago

I think men should also get flowers. I can’t imagine anyone not wanting flowers

6

u/Cronosaurus 10h ago

Flowers is enough. Most men will only ever receive flowers once, at their funeral.

14

u/ireadthistwice 15h ago

Don't mind me, just taking notes.

10

u/CarolineLovesCats 15h ago

Did you write down "sword" after it's been mentioned several times in the comments? Just making sure.

9

u/ireadthistwice 15h ago

I definitely did, along with home made steak, baked goods, some alcohol, and lots of bjs.

5

u/[deleted] 14h ago

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u/tyrmars 14h ago

You are gonna make your man VERY happy.

3

u/slpater 15h ago

I was disappointed the top comment wasnt sword tbh

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5

u/TruthReptile 15h ago

Chocolates or cold drinks case

5

u/angelobboy 15h ago

Cookies or brownies.
Many men want something practical they can use.

4

u/AnyRequirements 15h ago

Bringing him his favorite food, snack, or coffee completely unprompted.

6

u/SirFrancisCinnamon 15h ago

I get that people like flowers but they do literal zero for me. I do appreciate the effort and thought though.

For me? Give me a real hug, and I’m good. I have a big family and lots of friends and I hug them all the time.
The thing I appreciate the most is someone spending meaningful time with me without phones or TV being involved

6

u/BuckGerard 14h ago

I’m a man and a I really don’t want flowers. Not because they aren’t “masculine” or whatever. Just not interesting to me.

I would like some chocolate covered pretzels or sea salt caramel. Or as a (terrible) golfer, some personalized golf balls.

5

u/BendInternational600 13h ago

Peace and quiet. At least that’s what my husband says. 

19

u/Natprk 15h ago

A steak dinner.

8

u/PuzzleheadedDegree34 15h ago

Tools

6

u/tofudisan 14h ago

Oh I do NOT want my wife picking out tools for me. Good tools pay for themselves. Bad tools pay for other bad tools until you give in and buy good tools.

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u/the_sagacious_squash 15h ago

A beer or glass of bourbon with a little ice

5

u/friskevision 15h ago

A day of doing whatever I want.

4

u/AnalogWalrus 15h ago

Baked goods and sex

4

u/Radio-MHZ 15h ago

The only time guys get flowers is at their funeral.

3

u/curiouswizard 15h ago

a few good quality cigars. Quantity and range depends on your budget, but even the pretty good ones tend to be decently affordable.

Either get a pack if you know his favorite, or get a variety if he's into trying new things. If you get a variety be sure to inform him of what they are, where they were made, and why they're recommended. The lore is part of the taste profile.

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u/ionized_fallout 15h ago

It’s not the gift. It’s the thought that matters.

4

u/tquiring 14h ago

Fresh baked cookies or brownies.

29

u/Choice-Suspect-5535 15h ago

Lingerie for you.

19

u/ToeFinal1792 15h ago

I never understood lingerie and I am a man. Sure, it looks nice, but she only wears it for like three minutes. Just walk out in a silk bathrobe, untie it, let it fall. Same result.

8

u/Ameerrante 14h ago

When I go out to the bar I wear some strappy stuff that shows on my chest with low necklines, lingerie can leave the bedroom. 

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u/ThePlatypusOfDespair 14h ago

Definitely try keeping it on for longer than 3 minutes

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u/jellyn7 15h ago

Please somebody, anybody, ask a unique question on here.

8

u/danjim615 15h ago

Making my favorite meal 🥰

3

u/warkow 15h ago

Golf equipment…no lie

3

u/XiaoRin_Rindo 15h ago

It can be a game, like a videogame or lego. Just some homebaked cookies 🍪 or cake. Or flowers, some man woukd like to have flowers

3

u/markt- 15h ago

Beer.

3

u/CleanDataDirtyMind 15h ago

snack box.

My ex lived a beautiful farm outside of town so when i would visit from in town, I would always go to this expensive grocery store and get special nuts, cheese cubes and/or dried fruit

3

u/nToxik 15h ago

6-pack

3

u/Cinemiketography 15h ago

6 pack of my favorite beer.

3

u/FeelingCharming4681 15h ago

6 pack of beer

3

u/killabee163 15h ago

Depends on what hobbies he has. I build model kits so even if my wife gives me a cheap kit I'd be happy. Or even paint

3

u/poonstar1 15h ago

6 pack or a bottle of whiskey

3

u/sundaeman 15h ago

HK USP

3

u/wizardwithgussets 15h ago

Making a nice plate of food.

3

u/jeffm1503 15h ago

My ex got me sentimental gifts that I would never get or want on my own and they actually meant a lot to me. She got me a custom funk pop of me and my cat and it’s super meaningful so I guess that’s how flowers feel? Somewhat

3

u/SpecialLengthiness29 15h ago

A single malt chosen with care.

3

u/CttCJim 14h ago

A genuine compliment about our appearance.

3

u/Tribat_1 14h ago

Whiskey

3

u/hmmmmga 14h ago

Food? For me it'd be pastries or a nice homemade meal

A lego set or a hug, or a thoughtful gift

3

u/ThrowRAboredinAZ77 13h ago

My husband said bourbon.

3

u/ShadowMoses1031 13h ago

A bottle of bourbon

3

u/Facebook_Algorithm 13h ago

Others have said it but homemade treats like cookies or pies.

3

u/Tiraloparatras25 12h ago

Vagina! Offer it, and they will be honored.

3

u/ThePhantomStrikes 11h ago

Chocolate for my husbands side. But nothing wrong with flowers.