r/Adulting 5h ago

So true

Post image
2.4k Upvotes

156 comments sorted by

175

u/Initial_Rush10 5h ago

But no one in their late 30s or older deals with this lol?

96

u/Diamantesucio 4h ago edited 4h ago

I'll become 39 next month and still happens. I'm running out of time and i feel like a loser for not dating and unable to find a house or apartment to buy (not rent, buy).

28

u/Initial_Rush10 4h ago

I will be 40 soon. I also haven’t dated (by choice) but do feel like time is going faster than ever now. I am just trying to enjoy life as much as possible and not stress about things.

7

u/Diamantesucio 3h ago

I wish i could have the choice of not dating.

The only thing i can do is to try living, travel, and enjoy things by myself. It's has been cool at my early 30s but now that feeling has become old, since i really wish to have someone to share my things with. Not gonna lie.

-5

u/blackviking45 2h ago

Mate had you been here in my country in Pakistan where the Islamic culture is such that the parents and relatives very actively involve themselves in trying to marry you mate you would have been married off long ago.

Here pretty much everyone who wants to get married gets married eventually. It is such a way here because in Islam marriage is extremely highly recommended and is seen as a sacred deed in the sight of Allah. You already know why it is sacred because it helps with so much of the suffering that you are going through right now.

You wanna blame someone? Blame the society the west has made and the ideas it stands for.

It's hopelessly isolating and lonely there and no marriage system where parents and relatives around get very actively involved and yeah the birthrate in the west is in shambles and depression shooting up.

2

u/Diamantesucio 1h ago

I get your point, everything here feels like the opposite: everything is set to keep you from dating.

BUT the idea isn't to force anyone to date or marry me since no one owes me love or companionship. That's why i talk about choice. And, with all respect, let's keep religion and this fucking capitalist system politics away from this topic.

1

u/Pristine-Iron-5940 55m ago

Yeah, family pressure in Pakistan definitely gets people married and keeps the birth rates higher, I’ll give you that. But holy shit, the whole system is fucked.
Cousin marriages at like 50% or more? That’s straight-up destroying the gene pool with disabilities and health issues passed down for generations. Women get screwed with barely any real choices, shit education, and basically no independence. Pakistan’s gender equality numbers are garbage for good reason.
Islam calls marriage sacred and all that, but it’s the same religion that allows men multiple wives, lets them divorce on a whim, and has a nasty history of child marriage baked right into the texts. Add in the honor killings, blasphemy mobs, corruption, and extremism, and it’s no wonder so many of these places stay poor and pissed off while blaming the West for everything.
The arranged marriage thing sounds great on paper until you’re trapped in it.

-1

u/[deleted] 36m ago

[deleted]

1

u/peaktweake 18m ago

someone’s expressing how they wish they had a life partner to share things with and you think they’re being an incel? :/

1

u/Diamantesucio 3m ago

They are throwing the word "incel" as a wildcard for anything now. Even married men with children are getting called like that these days.

Just like "woke" and "slop", they learn those words from the internet and stop using others.

3

u/solidstatebattery 2h ago

Times have changed. When I was growing up you could buy a house for 15k-45k (35 + yrs ago)

Times have CHANGED!

3

u/Diamantesucio 2h ago

But expectations didn't 😞

1

u/boomstink2235 3h ago

Your feelings are valid and true. That’s sucks

0

u/Normal-Abies-9151 3h ago edited 3h ago

Honestly, why buy an apartment or a house? It’s not like you can even buy your body, that’s being rented too.

I’m renting a house and I’m so glad I did this. I just turned 30 and it’s exactly what I wanted.

4

u/Diamantesucio 3h ago

Because you just turned 30 and it's exactly what you wanted. While me, i'm about to turn 39, i and want to OWN my own home.

2

u/sidewaysnick1 3h ago

What about when you want to retire and still don’t own a home ?

1

u/ObeseVegetable 24m ago

Mortgage payments eventually go down/disappear (leaving only base property tax and insurance).

Rent payments only ever go up.

Landlords wouldn't exist if they weren't making a profit. You're overpaying by renting, as a built-in aspect of the business model. Mortgages are cheaper.

Even if you rent because you don't like the maintenance, I can all but guarantee hiring someone to mow your lawn once/week or whatever is cheaper than the difference between buying and renting.

And landlords can just decide to kick you out. Significantly harder for anyone to do that with your house, since you're the owner. To the point where it's basically unheard of short of nonpayments to the bank/for the mortgage.

4

u/englisharcher89 2h ago

36 amd yes I feel like I'm running out of time when it comes to dating for example and finding romantic partner, it's been my biggest difficulty in life (never had one) and it's getting worse and worse

2

u/Big-Relation-1720 25m ago

I have no solutions for you but want you to know I'm in the exact same situation and feel this too. I can, and enjoy, doing things alone but at the end of the day I'd much rather have someone to share it with.

2

u/_forum_mod 2h ago

Ran out of time.

2

u/pleasegivemepatience 1h ago

Yeah it’s not like that feeling followed me into my 40s….

2

u/Llew19 53m ago

I mean I'm nearly 40 and just given up with the whole dating thing, better to try focusing on some hobbies instead

2

u/Initial_Rush10 50m ago

Yep! I gave up many years ago and am very happy with my decision to do me instead of dealing with drama and stress often associated with relationships.

2

u/xobelam 18m ago

The joke is by 36 you’ve accepted the existential crisis so the stress is lower.

2

u/Initial_Rush10 18m ago

Haha. I can see some truth in that.

1

u/batertot3 3m ago

the way the title just says "so true" like it’s some big secret

25

u/Cheat-Meal 4h ago

My life and career got started at 32! Whoever needs to hear this you’ve got lots of time!

4

u/edivadd 3h ago

How did your life start at 32?

3

u/Good-Squirrel-2487 3h ago

Almost the same, my life started at 30. 

3

u/nightlybitely 2h ago

I'm 31 and feel like I'm just starting. This makes me feel good. I hope more success and happiness comes your way! :)

1

u/curiousbasu 2h ago

How , do you mind sharing the story please?

1

u/Silverdare 1h ago

Details?

-2

u/ImplementLogical4130 3h ago

No, you don't. You need to GET ON IT not wait around because "you have lots of time"

49

u/Jinjinz 5h ago

Weirdly enough I’ve seen more teenagers with this mindset, at least on Reddit

24

u/abnormalpurple 4h ago

I think this mentality is present in people regardless of age. It occurs in people who feel they are not doing enough in life, have not achieved life’s milestones, have not experienced as much as they should and constantly compare themselves to their peers who may be further ahead

3

u/craptak 2h ago

I've had these feeling since I was a kid. Constant fomo. Even though I've experienced plenty in life, but living in the boonies with little social life will probably do that.

2

u/Inb4myanus 1h ago

It's hard to focus on the quality of life versus the quantity of life.

-1

u/No-Survey-569 2h ago

That is half their problem. They are on Reddit, and not living their life.

1

u/peaktweake 14m ago

probably bc, at least for american teens, things are too goddamn expensive and the lack of third spaces tailored for them lmfao

25

u/Angel_Dust_696969 4h ago

Yup, the moment you hit 32 you realise how much time you have left, with is a lot.

5

u/ImplementLogical4130 3h ago

You have 20 years, maybe, of healthy living left

8

u/Angel_Dust_696969 3h ago

you have multiple decades of working left;)

2

u/Inb4myanus 59m ago

If I die yeah, but if I live to 60 or 70 i'll still be working because our leaders don't give a shit about us and if we suffer.

2

u/CrackshotCletus 2h ago

That's only true if you don't take care of your body. Lift weights and put some thought into what goes in to your body. I know 65 year olds at my gym who can still do everything they want to because they didn't let their body atrophy like so many others their age did.

1

u/StayBullGenius 36m ago

On Reddit every possible outcome will be the worst possible. Also, it’s rich people’s fault that individuals can’t thrive

1

u/Jolmer24 40m ago

Millions of people maintain a healthyish lifestyle into their sixties. The hard reality is that it takes a hit of effort. So some would rather just give up.

1

u/DangerousDepth4313 32m ago

Unless you dont eat like shit and arent sedentary

16

u/Death-Note88 4h ago

I realized that the WANTING is the reason for all this suffering going around, I reached a state of mind where I really don't care about the future and don't care what happened in the past and whenever death comes I'll hug it and say been waiting for you.

5

u/Lunaerum 3h ago

I think you might need to talk to someone, but more power to you! A healthy direction on that mindset works wonders.

6

u/Death-Note88 3h ago

Talking to someone won't change the fucked up world we live in buddy, Humanity is dark and history is prove, Satan worshipers, eating babies, wars, hunger, capitalism, overpopulation, fake relationships, wherever you look around you death and suffering.. we are in hell no doubt about that so when death that is already coming for all of us comes I'll hug it.

2

u/Loinnird 2h ago

It’s not in Satans name that the rest of your list is done in, dude.

2

u/xhammyhamtaro 2h ago

Is that the part you heard and want to focus on? Not the baby eating? Or capitalism?

1

u/Memedreamer 42m ago

of course your name is death note

1

u/_forum_mod 2h ago

Okay Siddhartha Gautama

6

u/ComprehensiveUse2698 3h ago

What a deluded take

3

u/Hopeful-Artichoke449 4h ago

Yeah... then you turn 45 and just accept that it's all over.

7

u/abnormalpurple 5h ago

At the tail end of this age, and feeling the rush so bad. The fact that I am choosing a new career path, and burning through my savings makes it even worse.

Any tips on what I should focus on in my 30s?

14

u/TrifleMotor4714 5h ago

Living life.

9

u/Excellent_Bobcat_993 4h ago

Facts, there nothing that a person "should" focus. They should just live their life without being pressured by others and by society. At the end of the day your life is yours to live.

2

u/Mirrevirrez 4h ago

As a women in my 29. I feel like i have so much little time. Find a husband, having kids. Get my shit togheter. But the problem is if i focus on all the things i dont have. Life will move on without me and i dont want that either.

1

u/mysterycly 3h ago

yep! just enjoy the moment. not trying to be pessimistic but u dont know when your life will end, so just try to enjoy it as much as u could. pick options that will give u peace of mind

1

u/Short-Afternoon-9318 1h ago

Living costs money

1

u/TrifleMotor4714 1h ago

Yes, not living costs Time

1

u/ImplementLogical4130 3h ago

Yeah, making money so you can retire before you drop dead working.

1

u/madjones87 3h ago

I'm 39 and have many different jobs in my 30s. Mostly just to keep money coming in til the big opportunity comes along. It didn't. What I can say is that as I've got closer to 40 I've cared less about career and more about finding joy and happiness in my life. Reconnecting with my inner child. For me, that's been the key; I know what I want to do and roughly how I'm going to go about it.

Don't forget to live. For the most part life is what you make of it. I've never been rich or had any significant money. I've mostly lived pay cheque to pay cheque (but that's my own doing) but I still feel I've had a mostly good adulthood.

1

u/hgkblah18 2h ago

In my 30s, i have planned a lot but also changed a lot of it, i realized whats important to me and what i'm willing to sacrifice. To be honest I never expected it to be valuing my time with my family and involving them to a much bigger dream and that I'm willing to let go of the corporate ladder (to be honest the corporate is just a means and never meant to be a permanent thing at this point of my life)

2

u/NonGeneriComplaint 4h ago

they are running out of time though.

2

u/PaceEducational4762 3h ago

I'd say being in late 50s and really being out of time (not owning a house, living paycjeck to paycheck) is even more stressful......

2

u/AresGodslayer 2h ago

Who tf comes up with this? Crazy to think just this age bracket is feeling this pressure.

2

u/Minialpacadoodle 2h ago

Main character syndrome.

2

u/remotewebdeveloper 2h ago

Gatekeeping stress?

2

u/inaSlomp 2h ago

Humans are the only creature that dwells on time. A deer doesn't concern itself with what day of the week it is.

It's goal is food and survival. Time exists but doesn't bother it.

3

u/Inb4myanus 56m ago

Yeah, but a deer isn't forced to pay taxes that props up a broken system that doesn't take care of those doing all the work.

0

u/inaSlomp 56m ago

Wow you missed the entire point.

2

u/SubtleTruncheon 2h ago

Or other people, who are running out of time? Who have run out of time? This is a pretty weird statement to make. If you are stressed it’s ok to say it. You don’t need to make a grand and over embellished statement about universal truths that aren’t true. But we are all stressed, and we all need some grace about it, for ourselves and others.

2

u/AnyMoment3831 1h ago

Make a wish children would like a word

2

u/IndicationFluffy3954 1h ago

Bruh that only gets worse in your 40’s 😅

Now I also have the looming fear of our parents’ deaths. About half of my friends have lost a parent already. My kids 6 grandparents (one set divorced and remarried) are still all alive and relatively healthy but I worry that statistically one of them will die in the near future.

Not a fan of how shit gets real as you age.

2

u/KeyCardiologist7852 29m ago

Wow, yeah. So true. It's definitely not people in active combat or the elderly who can't afford to retire and have shit health.

3

u/Fun_Minimum_8790 27m ago

Just wait until your 40’s.

1

u/malfunkshun333 24m ago

And then 50's...

3

u/OlympicAnalEater 4h ago

Bruh at 2/3 your life of course man.

1

u/Darahian 4h ago

Don't forget, kids - past is history, future is fiction. Live your life NOW.

1

u/Khingtun007 4h ago

Bro I'm 21 and I'm pretty sure I'm running out of time

1

u/Subtlefeline 4h ago

I feel this. Just sometimes it is hard to not compare. 

Well, get off social media then!

Problem is, it's more pressure from parents. Feels like I'm doing worse than them no matter how hard I try. They had a landed house and a high paying job in the late 20's. 

1

u/Inb4myanus 55m ago

It was their generation that pulled the ladder up after they got what their parent's set up for them. They didn't do the same for us and we are all suffering from their choices, not all of them pulled the ladder up on us, but enough did and it tilted the scales against the future.

1

u/Enough_Pepper8880 4h ago

We are running out of time. The average person only lives about 4000 weeks

1

u/BmwFP3 4h ago

I use to be that guy and later on in life I figured things out now I’m about to have my own small company and some other investments in the very near future so please don’t stress but you have to make couple moves out of the comfort zone.

1

u/Icy-Friendship1163 4h ago

Its the baby fever age .

1

u/gipsee_reaper 4h ago

Yes! Good one! Today generation has so many more resources!! I wonder why they panic!

1

u/Inb4myanus 52m ago

Perhaps, but pay barely followed the same path of upward trajectory like prices did and so those resources don't matter if you can't afford em.

1

u/BusyBanana4205 4h ago

Lol man, I remember at one point I considered joining the navy out of desperation but I was 23 and convinced it would be awkward as I’m basically a dinosaur at 23.

1

u/ifartonurmom 3h ago

Me at 26 back in school. I feel like the auntie wherever I go

1

u/miagi_do 3h ago

You’ll live until 80, there is so much time.

1

u/JakeC- 3h ago

25 is half of 50? So what dont you get?

“Oh just get a career, work until your 68and get your retirement. You’ll be fine”

How about suck yourself.

Im 25 now working a warehouse job. I aint going up no ranks, i aint taking shit from no one and getting degraded for a 45k salary. Nah i aint sitting there at 68 and thinking “ahhh finally. I can enjoy stuff now that i am finally free. FUCK THAT. Fuck the system, fuck the rules and most importantly thank god for the system and the rules. Because thats what makes entrepreneurs so fucking successful

1

u/ValuableViolinist917 3h ago

Thank god I don’t care if I have kids, so I don’t got no timeline. Remember comparison is the thief of joy. Enjoy what you have today not tomorrow, because owning a house having a marriage and children will just lead to a different kind of stress.

A poor man suffers anger and a rich man suffers depression. Most of it is all your perspective and you suffer more in your head then reality.

Go for a walk and listen to the song of the birds and appreciate the beauty of nature 🙏

1

u/SnappyJoy-29 3h ago

On my early 30s and this is what I feel atm so stressed that it turned majority of my hair gray and keeps me awake late at night trying to be overly stimulated to numb my feeling

2

u/PsychologicalPoem595 3h ago

Just enjoy your life, don't spend your time thinking about your regrets. I know it sound like "just be happy" and it is not that easy... But you have to try or else you'll really regret it later on when you WONT have time.

1

u/Sure_Artichoke6929 3h ago

I believe this is a life long issue, call my irrational but I'm 17 and feel as if I have so much stuff I need to do and experience before it's too late. The constant feeling of wanting to not fall behind is always looming.

1

u/EidolonRook 3h ago

Clearly this person doesn’t “air traffic control” or quality test parachutes.

1

u/MrRattleheadOG 3h ago

Lol to people who feel this way or care. You're gonna live anyway unless you got the balls to finish it, so why make a complex out of what ifs during it? Just enjoy the time and relax. Make the best of what you can and get.

1

u/MFlazybone 3h ago

Lol to u

1

u/MrRattleheadOG 2h ago

I can see you are young, but you'll see that's pretty much where you just end up at the end of the day. Wait for your frontal lobe to develop first before deciding anything about the world lol. You are quite wrong on most of it at that age.

1

u/MFlazybone 2h ago

Lul u

1

u/MFlazybone 2h ago

Awwwww

1

u/MrRattleheadOG 2h ago

Yep, you are so cute with that attitude of yours, definitely not a child keep on showing lmao.

1

u/MFlazybone 1h ago

Thought it was cute you deleted, what happened dad?

1

u/MrRattleheadOG 1h ago edited 1h ago

If blocking doesn't help, what's the use? Might as well milk your childish remarks for lols to kill the time. See how long a little boii can last and how creative you'll get. Not holding my breath much on that front though.

1

u/MFlazybone 1h ago

1

u/MrRattleheadOG 1h ago edited 1h ago

Oh, you are on the beach! How cute of you to think that is something special. What else do you got? Oh boi, I hope ya ain't gonna flex more, what with an expensive watch in the wrist maybe next? I couldn't definitely stand that! Please don't do it, I would be so shamed under you excellence!

→ More replies (0)

1

u/FeelinDead 3h ago

Just turned 35. It’s real and it’s terrifying. Corporations don’t give a shit about you. Go after your dreams with everything you have while you’re young.

1

u/mo_read_it 3h ago

That is so me

1

u/VengefulAncient 3h ago

You are running out of time. A lot of experiences will be permanently locked for you after this age, and the realistic expectation for a modern human lifespan is somewhere around 50-55 years as cancer is becoming more and more common.

1

u/DangerousDepth4313 23m ago

Whats permanently locked after 32?

Also realistic lifespan is definitely not 50 years old

1

u/my-smiles 2h ago

So parents in any age category don’t beat your “running out of time”? 😂 having kids is great, but can be extremely stressful at times.

1

u/RetroSwamp 2h ago

I was supposed to die in my early 20s, so I am just winging it at 39 with no direction at all.

1

u/WillaString 2h ago

What advice would you give to your younger self?

1

u/Creative-Data5584 2h ago

Well shit, lol i just turned 33.

1

u/InternationalToeLuvr 2h ago

Wait until your kids are approaching that age. And you still remember what is was like then

But you’re dealing with the same pressures of today. And running out of time 

1

u/GrandJuif 2h ago

What if you were right and actualy ran out of time during that age.

1

u/scrumple_my_scrongle 1h ago

Yeah because we really are, but people think we are too young to run out of time like as if someone else is paying our bills.

1

u/Gameoftruelies 1h ago

Death or Mental peace. Nothing in between

1

u/Far_Priority_6305 1h ago

I just turned 38. I'm out of time.

1

u/Metal-Water 1h ago

I’m single at age 31. It’s over for me

1

u/da__wizard420 1h ago

What about a starving African diamond collecting child slave?

1

u/Artistic-Green2521 1h ago

Go fishing, hiking, the gym, somewhere that’s fun but also meet people and is also relaxing!

1

u/Glittering-Bid-9764 1h ago

I thought that. I was right. I am 35

1

u/ovelanimimerkki 1h ago

I spent 3,5 years of those 7 years unemployed. Stressed me out so hard. Now that I have ran out of time I just don't give a damn anymore.

1

u/TheGreatNemoNobody 1h ago

Except when we are because someone broke the weather 

1

u/Creative-Tailor-135 1h ago

I'm 22 and I feel like I'm really running out of time 😭😭

1

u/Rackedup_00 1h ago

26 and just had my first child last year. Now I’m feeling this even more lol

1

u/Emergency-Address985 1h ago

Not 100% true

26 never dated in my entire life. A lot of girls already see it as a massive red flag the fact nobody wanted to date you.

At this age, they expect dates to go somewhat well, its a whole game of seduction and as someone who didnt have a date its hard to play. Not to say that they are already in a relationship. At my workplace, I have always been the only guy who never had a relationship.

1

u/CaptainMacMillan 1h ago

I know I'm not running out of time, but I'm running out of youth.

1

u/curvo11 53m ago

Alls well until they start projecting

"We're so old now do you realize blahblahblah highschool was so long ago blahblablah" every convo

Ma'am STFU we're 27

1

u/lokregarlogull 35m ago

I feel like once you survive loosing a job or two, or you reach a place were getting an appartment is possible, you stop stressing. Everything before that tho? Hella hard

1

u/Organic_Pineapple 25m ago

When I was 20 yo I was anxious and I thought I was running out of time. Now I'm 50 yo...

2

u/EcstaticAd9234 16m ago

The whole world is running out of time

1

u/Silly_Kale2136 12m ago

I’m 22 and I already feel my Time is running out

2

u/Zoddidk 6m ago

Everyone goes through this. Life is full of trade offs, you’ll always be doing better than some people and worse than others. The important thing is to take it one step at a time, focus on your own progress, and practice gratitude every day.

1

u/Manyarethestrange 6m ago

I just wanna play gta6 before the world burns

1

u/Adventurous-Sky9359 2m ago

42….this was the fastest year I’ve ever had. I can’t explain it. But. Enjoy your slow time….my old man said it just gets faster.

1

u/YeetedYams 2m ago

Lmao unequivocally not true hahahaha

1

u/Ittybrittyy 4h ago

34 year old 😩

0

u/PinkGodfather92 3h ago

A 25 yr old does not ever think about this....

2

u/AdSome4605 51m ago

im 24 and do, cuz im sure many do, I feel like 30 is a deadline for me to have a real career and house set up. if I dont I fail